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August wedding guest and need shoes/sandals

51 replies

Jins · 13/04/2023 08:21

Let me start by saying that I’ll be building my outfit round my footwear 🤣
We’ve been invited to a family wedding in August. Smart country house type venue with a formal dress code. I’m in the father of the bride’s generation.

Over the last few years I’ve been prioritising comfort over style and I’ve lived in Fitflops, birkies, Skechers etc. I have boots for cold weather and brogues (which I hate) for smarter occasions which I wear with trousers. I also have a crate full of heels and strappy sandals which make me wince to think about wearing them.

So I need something dressy but comfortable and it needs to be either a timeless classic that I’ll get years of use from or a really cheap throwaway that I can charity shop afterwards. Size 3.5 - 4 wide fitting and I’m short in stature.

Any suggestions?

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OrchidsBlooming · 13/04/2023 08:38

Honestly, If they work for you, I'd buy brand-new Birkenstocks in a fabulous colour, get a great pedicure and wear them with wide-leg trousers or a maxi-length dress.

However, there was this thread a while back that had some good brands to look at https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/style_and_beauty/4732822-trying-to-remember-a-shoe-recommendation-pretty-flats

Jins · 13/04/2023 10:04

Thanks for the suggestion and the link. Some useful ideas there.
I was thinking about a maxi dress.

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myvinted · 13/04/2023 21:28

LivelyBlake · 13/04/2023 21:20

OMG this website 😍

Jins · 14/04/2023 06:11

The suede slingbacks look possible. Thanks @CharlotteStreetW1

Not sure about the flats for a full day.

Proper statement shoes there @LivelyBlake and part of me is tempted but I know I’d only wear them once.

I keep coming back to Fitflop fisherman sandals in either black or tan
https://www.fitflop.com/uk/en/shop/gracie-matt-buckle-leather-fisherman-sandals-p-FV3#592

Women's Gracie Leather Back-Strap-Sandals | FitFlop UK

Women's Gracie Leather

https://www.fitflop.com/uk/en/shop/gracie-matt-buckle-leather-fisherman-sandals-p-FV3#592

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Lightningrain · 14/04/2023 06:22

I live in flats now but I bought a pair of these to wear to the races last summer and my feet were surprisingly fine at the end of the day. I have wide feet so most court shoes and strappy sandals are a no for me.

i thought I’d only wear them once but I ended up going back and buying them in black and pastel pink too. Obviously not as comfortable as my usual footwear but not crippling to wear for an occasion.

OrchidsBlooming · 14/04/2023 06:43

My first thought was not sure how you'd style them for a wedding but Pinterest showed some options. Very much a linen/natural vibe.

So I'd start thinking about outfits next as the choice of black or tan would depend on what your clothes choices were.

I think you could do better, and definitely more colourful. But end of the day you want to be comfortable and if they work for you, then just work round them.

August wedding guest and need shoes/sandals
August wedding guest and need shoes/sandals
OrchidsBlooming · 14/04/2023 07:02

One more brand to consider, they are $$ but the sandals are super comfortable with padded soles. The Lena or the Chloe might be an alternative?

airandgracelondon.com/collections/sandals

gogohmm · 14/04/2023 07:37

I'd go for the fisherman's sandals op. I have a similar pair that are timberland. If you have a suitable strappy sandal and are staying in the hotel you could wear them for the ceremony.

Btw at the last two very formal weddings I've been to nobody was in maxi dresses, midi is definitely the style du jour last year at least

OldHouseLover · 14/04/2023 07:57

I understand your dilemma but I don't think fit flop gladiator sandals are at all suitable for a wedding in a smart country house setting. Sorry OP. I also think maxi dresses are a bad choice especially if you're short & wearing flat sandals.

But I'm sure a million posters will rush on to tell me how wrong I am now.

I think you need a midi dress from a petit range so the proportions are correct for you & a mid height block heel.

CharlotteStreetW1 · 14/04/2023 08:40

The suede slingbacks look possible. Thanks @CharlotteStreetW1
Not sure about the flats for a full day.

I've worn them for a full day wedding including dancing and a 20 minute walk home 🙂

Jins · 14/04/2023 08:43

I’ll be making my own outfit. I’ve been sewing for myself for years. I’ve got a few patterns in mind and a couple of fabrics ready to roll. So I’m not worried about the clothes side of things.

I won’t be wearing a block heel. They do nothing for me. If I need a heel I’ve a number of pairs already that I could wear for part of the day and then change to something more comfortable.

I’ve set aside some time this weekend to have a look round the shops and try a few things on.

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Jins · 14/04/2023 08:45

CharlotteStreetW1 · 14/04/2023 08:40

The suede slingbacks look possible. Thanks @CharlotteStreetW1
Not sure about the flats for a full day.

I've worn them for a full day wedding including dancing and a 20 minute walk home 🙂

You described the day perfectly. There will be a lot of dancing and we’re walking about a mile back to our accommodation afterwards.
Flats go back on list 🤣

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Backtobed · 14/04/2023 08:57

What's your budget?

Jimmy Choo have a style called Bing which are extremely comfortable and very easy to wear. They do a few different heel heights and loads of colours too. But if that's more than you want to spend, Kurt Geiger do a near identical copy for a lot less ££.

Jins · 14/04/2023 09:12

@Backtobed I’m more Kurt Geiger budget than Jimmy Choo but I love the Bing mules. I love mules actually - might go hunting along those lines.

Realistically the budget is up to £150-200 for something timeless that I’ll get loads of wear out of. For something I buy because it’s ‘suitable’ for one day the budget drops considerably and I’ll be scouring primark and Matalan. Matalan had some sandals yesterday that were comfortable and very budget friendly but I couldn’t get past the block heels.

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Backtobed · 14/04/2023 09:17

I've just had a scroll on Kurt Geiger and they have some absolutely stunning shoes at the minute! Although the bing style mules are one of my faves.

I've fallen into the trap of buying shoes for a specific occasion too many times and you always end up wearing them once and never again. With your budget I'd definitely invest in something nice like the KG that will make you want to wear them again, best of luck!

EveryWitchWaybutLoose · 14/04/2023 09:17

I bought these after asking in here about smart sandals. Even my mother (a real style maven, as an ageing actress, no really) approves, and she tends to think that I dress down far too much.

https://www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-lisbon-leather-caged-fisherman-sandals/p6025568

Theyre leather, and have been comfortable from 1st wear and will become more so as the leather softens and shapes to my feet.

EveryWitchWaybutLoose · 14/04/2023 09:23

And if you want heels, but not block heels (I tend to agree they can be rather unflattering - too clunky and chunky) then you could scour places for kitten heels.

I’m only sorry they’re out of fashion, because I think they can be very flattering, due to the tapered heel tip and the wide base of the heel where it joins to the sole of the shoe gives you more comfort and support than a standard high heel.

PS fellow dress-maker here, so I understand the freedom you have in designing the dress. What patterns /styles are you thinking of? I’m rather disappointed with the major pattern companies’ current spring/summer releases, especially Vogue (I spend a fortune on Vogue patterns some seasons).

Jins · 14/04/2023 09:28

Fisherman sandals are everywhere aren’t they? I’m definitely going to look at them @EveryWitchWaybutLoose.

I had a gorgeous pair of Kurt Geiger T bar 4”heels that used to be my go to wedding shoes but I sold them last year. A 4” heel on a size 3.5 shoe makes for a very uncomfortable day.

I’ve just fallen into the rabbit hole of ballroom and dance shoes. I may be some time
https://www.dancewearcentral.co.uk/dance-shoes-c46/ballroom-latin-shoes-c55

Ballroom Dance Shoes, Latin Dance Shoes - Salsa -Women's, Children's & Men's

Ballroom dance shoes. Latin and salsa shoes

https://www.dancewearcentral.co.uk/dance-shoes-c46/ballroom-latin-shoes-c55

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Jins · 14/04/2023 09:36

@EveryWitchWaybutLoose I’m old enough to be forgiven for being unfashionable but I adore kitten heels. Always have.

I tend not to look at the big 4 pattern companies as the independents have suited me better. I’m leaning towards True bias calvin in a cotton lawn I have in shades of turquoise

Calvin Wrap Dress / Top

The Calvin pattern is a wrap dress and top with exposed bias binding that extends into long ties to form a bow closure. It has rings and sliders which create adjustable shoulder straps for an easy fit. View A is a short top that hits approximately two...

https://truebias.com/collections/all/products/calvin-wrap-dress

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ErrolTheDragon · 14/04/2023 10:15

The last time I wore nice suede shoes to a wedding the photos were taken on a lovely lawn ... they ended up with mud and grass clippings on them. Women in heels were in trouble sinking in...

Flat or wedges in leather not suede or fabric, whatever else you do!

Jins · 14/04/2023 10:50

Great tip there @ErrolTheDragon I got married on a Caribbean beach and my heels sank to the sole in the sand. Not the elegant glide I’d envisaged 🤣

I think I’ve got some wedges in the crate of doom. I should really go through it before I hit the shops

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