What to wear to a 50th party?

[PartyWhere]

DH's friends from uni. I don't really know any of them except one couple. I have a top something like this (John Lewis link), slightly shorter and black with small white dots. DH says it's not "party" enough.

I haven't been to a party in over 14 years.... No idea what to wear. It's a meal with dancing after, which we won't stay for. I'm early 40's, generally wear jeans and t-shirt to hide my belly. Carrying a bit extra weight. Usually size 12-14/L trousers, 8-10/S or M top, 1m75 and 72kg. Wear bootcut trousers to hide my clown feet (43). Don't really have the legs for a dress. Have two months to sort something. What should I wear?

Now this, is a party top.

www.lightinthebox.com/en/p/women-s-blouse-shirt-plain-sequins-v-neck-casual-streetwear-tops-khaki_p8881022.html?litb_from=pinterest_sns_paid&utm_source=pinterest_sns_paid&utm_medium=sns&utm_campaign=litb_catalogs&epik=dj0yJnU9Xzc2ZWNKR1FLcThRbUQ0V2xOZGE1RWhSbGE1OUpzenEmcD0wJm49bWp3TUNMQlh5YjBLYjMwQzFVNDJMQSZ0PUFBQUFBR1FFX2t3

Wear something you are comfortable in, but also a bit glam. If there’s dancing people will dress up a bit.

lits of women will be in dresses I reckon

nobody cares what size feet you have, mine are 42, I don’t hide them, nobody cares

how about a dress? So many around

Reply kind of party is it? Is it a hard core drinking -disco or a string quartet and a finger buffet?

That top is more parents evening and lunch in m and s that party. It uk k it's the sunflowers.

You use need a nice outfit. And then you can party- fly it!

I went to lovely party last year and wore a nice black and pink floral tiered skirt and a plain black short sleeved fitted sweater and gold necklace, suede heeled boots and a gold buckled belt. black leather bag with a gold and pleather strap. I wore tights because I don't like my bare legs.

Do you have shoes? I find this key! But. Have awkward feet

Maybe some palazzo trousers and an a tucked in top? Or slim leg and a voluminous top. Sainsburys have some nice oversized shirts that you could zhuzz up?

Where do you like to shop?

I love a jumpsuit for an easy way to look dressy. I have this one and confirm it’s super flattering on the stomach. SilkFred Jumpsuit

It has cropped legs though which might not work if you‘re looking for a long bootcut style, but you’d definitely be able to find a longer style. What’s your budget?

Really depends on the venue as above but generally speaking a good pair of jeans and a silk (or silk look) shirt looks great and is still comfortable, add big earrings and some heeled boots, maybe get your hair done. The top you've linked to is definitely not party-ish.

Out of interest why have you not been out in so long and why have you already decided that you'll be leaving early?

I have had the Silk Thead jumpsuit for a couple if years. It's on old favourite on there and I love it! It's perfect for a party.

Your husband's right. If you were the filing clerk in a solicitor's office you could wear that top and nobody would notice it.

I know that's not helpful but you haven't given enough information about you or the venue.

My own university reunions, which meant travelling back to the university city, so we were there Friday night all day Saturday and Saturday were everyday clothes for the daytime activities but dressed up, quite glamorous for the evening, particularly the Saturday night.

I went out last night and wore a gold satin pleated midi skirt, fitted black top, high black boots, gold accessories felt smart yet comfortable. Perhaps something like that? The skirt was £2 off vinted.

A suit. Ideally with long, wide leg trousers and a heeled boot it’s a pointy toe. Something like this or in black, with a tux jacket. This one is Mango.

*with a pointy toe.

Reply kind of party is it? I'm not really sure, DH has given me limited info. It's in a trendy bar, there will be a meal but he think not necessarily sit down dinner kind. Not hard core drinking but will be alcohol flowing. More disco music type. It's not a uni reunion- it's a husband and wife joint 50th.

Do you have shoes?
I have some black shoes and black boots with heels although I haven't worn them for a good 10 years. Have DM's - pair of canvas and pair of boots.

Where do you like to shop?
jeans + decathlon/icebreaker 😳 I don't like shopping anywhere...

Out of interest why have you not been out in so long and why have you already decided that you'll be leaving early?
DC and DC. DH wants to leave them alone at home (IL's 10 min drive away) so we need to be on the last train back.

The first thing in noticed about what you write is that you do not feel confident in your body. Your all about 'hiding' your stomach and feet.

The measurements you give were quite a surprise, they sound completely normal and something to be prod of rather than hiding away.

Whereabouts do you live? If you are anywhere near a John Lewis, I'd encourage you to book a personal shopper appointment, tell them about the occasion and see what they come up with. There will be no pressure for you to buy anything. You can book as many appointments as you like until they find something for you to fall in love with.

After so many years of not going out, you totally deserve at least one outfit in which you feel lovely. One that concentrates on your many good points rather than attempting to hide any not quite perfect parts.

At any stage in your life you completely deserve to feel good about yourself. Find some advice to help you find the right outfit. I too hate shopping, when it's just an aimless wonder around with nothing 'jumping up at me'. Finding someone who can suggest things that you feel good in will transform your feelings.

All the very best

I'm of the age where we & our group are all turning 50 & the celebrations are all definitely dressy.
We've had house parties, drinks & fingers food in smart bars, sit down meal in a super nice restaurant & a party in a tennis club with a dj...so quite a mix of venues over the past 18mths

Without exception people have dressed up very nicely.

I really don't think the top you've shown is right for an event like this. You need yo think more ocsasion dressing.

A desks seems like it might be too far out of your comfort zone so in your shoes I'd be looking for smart wide legged trousers, mid heel ankle boots & a really dressy top. Pay attention to hair / nails / makeup & maybe consider getting them done professionally if you're not confident doing them?

And finally - why go all that trouble to not stay for the whole event? I think you should stay for thr dancing & have fun?

I truly can't imagine not having been to a party in over 14 years 😱

I hope you go & have lots of fun!

Dress - not a desk !! Stupid autocorrect 🙄

I'd also go widelegged jumpsuit. They feel like pyjamas and look dressy! And you can wear DMs. If you get black accessorize with nice jewellery.
Next do loads so you could order a bunch online and see what works.

That's great. DMS are everywhere so as long as they are clean you can wear them. Even with skirts and dresses.

I would guess that most women
Will be wearing Dresses and jumpsuits as that is what I would wear to a party in a trendy bar.

If you don't want to wear a party dress /skirt / jumpsuit /trouser suit and want to stick to more usual style you can just do "jeans and a nice top" party version. So some "good" dark jeans, DMs and a "nice top" which depends on he style of jeans and your body shape which would look the best. Evening bag, nice belt makeup hair and maybe gel nails,

Really? @StephenDedalus@StephenDedalus

Sorry posted too soon!

@StephenDedalus I was going to say that I just thought about it and I haven't been to a party for 9years. I hate that kind of thing. And honestly I'm now at the stage where if someone invited me to a party I'd be wearing what I wear for work, wide leg trousers and white trainers. And maybe some lipstick instead of bare lips.

OP, maybe you could think about what you normally wear and find something quite similar but more presentable than, say, a decathlon fleece (that's my kind of comfy too).

So if you like to wear a v neck t-shirt, find a nice one, maybe Cos for an affordable version.

And I like the wide leg trouser vibe as per PPs. But I would go for flat shoes rather than a heel if you don't know whether you will be able to sit down. So a dressy ballet shoe or shiny brogues.

The loveliest party guest is a happy and comfortable party guest.

If you're not confident, wear black. It's slimming, it's chic, it doesn't shout look at me. A lovely jumpsuit would be fantastic. Buy some new shoes that you like and put on some sparkly earrings or a necklace, nice lipstick and enjoy yourself

Agree with the black jumpsuit. Can look dressy but understated. I like the top hat someone posted the sequin one, and a pair of black jeans or boots. So times wearing jeans with heeled boots is nice- and if you feel underdressed you just need to feel confident, enjoy your night out, and you will look beautiful in any case

I went to one last weekend. Wore nice oversize blouse, high heels boots and jeggings. I wouldn't have enjoyed it in a dress. It was lovely and we danced the night away. (Maybe look for a blouse which is more evening and less work).

I was going to say that I just thought about it and I haven't been to a party for 9years
In 9 years you haven't been to a 40th, 50th or a New Years celebration or a leaving do or baby shower, hen party or any gathering to celebrate something?

I was at a joint 50th a couple of weeks ago (wore a Cos dress and boots), and a friend looked wonderful in this Whistles high-necked sequinned top, jeans and Docs.

2nd a jumpsuit. I wore one to a 50th last week. Super comfy and can so easily be dressed up. A wide legged on would work if you are conscious of your feet, but I agree, no need to hide them!