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Original poster

Wearing White to a Wedding

91 replies

Belladonnamama · 05/10/2022 18:00

Would you wear this dress to a wedding as a guest? Couple are in their 40s,getting married in a hotel, together years with two children.

Wearing White to a Wedding
OP posts:
SalviaOfficinalis · 07/10/2022 08:04

I would stay out of it now. You’ve done your best to get friend to change a bad decision. There’s nothing more to be done without crossing the line into “meddling”.

SalviaOfficinalis · 07/10/2022 08:05

Actually the only thing you could do is suggest to friend that she checks with the bride… then it’s between the two of them.

oct · 07/10/2022 10:13

SalviaOfficinalis · 07/10/2022 08:05

Actually the only thing you could do is suggest to friend that she checks with the bride… then it’s between the two of them.

Good idea this

Original poster
Belladonnamama · 07/10/2022 15:15

SalviaOfficinalis · 07/10/2022 08:05

Actually the only thing you could do is suggest to friend that she checks with the bride… then it’s between the two of them.

I've said it to friend to check with bride if she is OK with her wearing the dress. We shall see what happens.

OP posts:
Divebar2021 · 07/10/2022 15:23

Is this for a wedding coming up because that’s even weirder for an autumnal wedding.

IncompleteSenten · 07/10/2022 15:27

Your friend is going to get a lot of people talking about what a twatty thing she's doing.

Tell the bride.

It's just not on.

There are so many colours to choose from. The only reason to wear white (at a white wedding) is to get some attention.

Even if that attention is people looking, thinking well she's a twat, and laughing at her behind her back while the bridesmaid figures out the best way to trip and spill red wine on her.

nomistake · 07/10/2022 15:39

Eeek this Virgos lounge dress was literally my wedding dress for my evening reception - absolutely not suitable for a wedding, especially a low key wedding as its a low key wedding dress!!

Original poster
Belladonnamama · 07/10/2022 15:40

Wedding is in December.

OP posts:
TooHotToRamble · 07/10/2022 15:51

It is definitely definitely not ok (unless the bride ok's it if course). Especially as it's a less formal wedding because the bride could be wearing a similar style.

Your friend is very unreasonable to risk for one second upsetting a bride on her wedding day. Just wear another bloody colour. It's not difficult. And no accessorising with gold won't make it any better.

Is she a narcissist? Can't bear to think of someone else being centre of attention? That's what I'd be wondering if I saw her dressed in that at a wedding.

RaininginDarling · 07/10/2022 16:08

I find it deeply weird when people wear white/trad bridal outfits as a guest to another's wedding - its very look at me! I also find it odd when the bride's mother does it, which is weirdly common judging from some of the wedding FB groups I've been following.

FKATondelayo · 07/10/2022 16:42

Rebekah Vardy would wear that to Colleen Rooney's wedding. If that is the vibe your friend is after.

Couldbemeoryou · 07/10/2022 17:42

@Belladonnamama I have worn a white retro (1960s) top but with a contrasting skirt to a wedding many years ago. In hindsight it probably did look too bridal on the top half. I didn’t stop to consider that it might offend the bride. I was in a rush, it looked smart and in my mind I thought that the bride is just that and no guest is ever going to be mistaken for the bride unless they wear a entirely white or an ivory dress.

OP, the dress you show in the photo is more of a cocktail style and perhaps they think that with the gold on the shoulders, it’s sufficiently different?

All eyes are on the bride and I don’t think a secure bride would be bothered by what other guests are wearing, unless it’s as extreme as another guest wearing a white, puffy, off the shoulder meringue and clinging to the groom throughout the event!

RaininginDarling · 07/10/2022 17:59

Couldbemeoryou · 07/10/2022 17:42

@Belladonnamama I have worn a white retro (1960s) top but with a contrasting skirt to a wedding many years ago. In hindsight it probably did look too bridal on the top half. I didn’t stop to consider that it might offend the bride. I was in a rush, it looked smart and in my mind I thought that the bride is just that and no guest is ever going to be mistaken for the bride unless they wear a entirely white or an ivory dress.

OP, the dress you show in the photo is more of a cocktail style and perhaps they think that with the gold on the shoulders, it’s sufficiently different?

All eyes are on the bride and I don’t think a secure bride would be bothered by what other guests are wearing, unless it’s as extreme as another guest wearing a white, puffy, off the shoulder meringue and clinging to the groom throughout the event!

I think its bad manners.

Secure bride here, thanks. Not all of us want to look like we're hiding a giant toilet roll under our wedding dress on our wedding day - which is why ambiguous semi-bridal outfits are particularly obnoxious

Couldbemeoryou · 07/10/2022 18:16

The puffy, meringue dress image is a stereotype for satirical effect. It’s what many think of when they imagine fractious brides trying to control the uncontrollable.

I don’t think a calm and collected bride would care one hoot what any guest was wearing unless it was ridiculously, stereotypically bridal - as described above.

Could well be ‘bad manners’, it could be that the guest, isn’t thinking much about the day and has rashly decided on an outfit that isn’t too revealing or tightly fitting and the only one that she has is something partially white, OR it could be a narcissistic terror of a guest who has made it her sole purpose to try and upstage the bride purely by what she’s wearing.

I mean, who cares?

The bride is usually too happy, busy and exhausted to give any credence to what other guests are wearing or doing.

lara894 · 07/10/2022 18:39

Why does it matter or why would it make it ok for you to wear white if the couple

  • get married in a hotel
  • have been together years
  • have children.?

Seems like you're trying to justify your dress choice using the above.

Don't be a sh*t and wear any other colour.. there's lots of other choices

lara894 · 07/10/2022 18:40

Sorry read the entire thread & it's not you then - the above is for your friend

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