Anyone gone grey then changed their mind ?

[Desmorelda]

I'm so torn about what to do. Mid 50s and went fully grey over lockdown. It's now slightly wavy and shoulder length. Initially I liked it because it's in fairly good condition now but I'm really having a wobble at the moment. Last week I inadvertently caught sight of myself in a mirror and was shocked. I just looked so well..grey and washed out. A work colleague said she liked it. Another when asked reluctantly said it made me look older. Ds 2 14 said older but 'You still look nice' 🤔 and a good friend was non committal. OH isn't fussed....
What options are there for someone with slate grey hair ? Brorange or trusty highlights which I really cannot afford regularly ? Or maybe a better haircut ? Any advice ?

Just to add - the colleague who liked it is 60 but the colleague who didn't is almost 20 years younger...

I am similar age and similar hair length , gone pretty well grey all over -no white roots , mine started as grey 'highlights' which became more in number !

I'm going to have a good few inches lopped off to give me
'on shoulder' length .
I'm noticing quite a bit of hair loss which I'm hoping is just due to the weight on my poor menopausal scalp. And as my hair is wavy , I look a bit witchey with it loose .

Absolutely no way am I going down the route of dyeing it again though
I have used a semi permenant dye in the past , probably over 4 years since I've used it .
But I think now I'd have too much colour grab on the white hairs and colour fade
And the root regrowth.

I've got some Aveda Blue Malva conditioner which doesn't add any colour but tones it a bit

My skin tone has changed, I'd have to go to a colourist and factor in the cost and time of having ongoing treatments .
Though I do sometimes catch sight of myself in a mirror if I'm out and I See My Mother Looking Back !

I first went natural in my y late 40's and it was still quite dark in places. Because I had a pixie cut it was very patchy looking and I tried to bleach bits, mucked it up and had to do the whole lot. I really regretted bleaching it again.

A couple of years later I stopped bleaching. I'm 53 now and I'm growing it out , its below my ears now, I'm trying for chin length.
I brighten it up with purple shampoo and dry shampoo is good for covering dark bits.
I definitely use more blusher, I use Benefit Dandelion over my face and Nars Orgasm blush.
I never used any type of demi dye, my hair is very white around my face and I'd be scared it wouldn't wash out.
When my hair was darker grey I did use grey toners to darken it more.

I’m wobbling too. Lockdown pepper and salt - I’d been using henna before. Took ages for the grey parts to settle down and lose a nasty yellow tinge.

I don’t know … The henna takes a whole afternoon and realistically will barely last a week now on short, half grey hair. But I can’t get used to this new look. It’s bearable in the mirror but I really do not like how it looks in photos.

(Also I’m in an occupation that values youth above all else. But that’s another story.)

Just not sure I can bear to go back to all the labour and effort …

Same here. Salt and pepper and one minute I like the grey/silver, especially at the moment as I have a bit of colour to my face but the next I feel like it really ages me and I have to sit on my hands and fight the urge not to rush out for a box dye!

I really wish I didn’t have this negative attitude towards aging- I always said I would grow old gracefully and not give a stuff what society thought! 😁

Ah, my DD tells me my hair is ok , I think she panics if my eyes stray towards hair dye , because she's the one who'd need to help me apply it.

I did try some Bleach London Fade-to-Grey on a hair portion, it did diddly squat so I wasn't inspired to do my whole head .
I tried a non-colour henna powder last year , my hair was so dry after . At least when I used Lush henna I got a glossy soft head of hair ( but it is really too much faff to think about going back to henna again )

Glad in a way that others feel the same ! I wear makeup and probably overdo the
blusher to counteract the pallidness... I'd love to wear the mythical bright red lippy that everyone with grey hair talks about but just don't have the confidence and I wear a mask most of the day at work plus hair up so it's a bit pointless.
I'm thinking about sorting out my hairstyle rather than the colour. Been there and done the pixie (not flattering) although appreciate on some it can look fab, same with the sharp bob (face is too pointy 😥). Problem is my hair is wavy but can verge on scruffy. My dress style is a kind of seasalt casual so I guess it's getting the hair/clothes match right !

This is exactly what I did, stopped having highlights ( used my natural colour and a reddish shade) during lockdown and decided to go grey, aged 64. After about 15 months I looked in the mirror and suddenly changed my mind! I shocked my hairdresser when I said I wanted purple highlights though!

She suggested that I had low lights ie coloured the hair underneath the top layer which I’d not heard of, she said that brightly coloured highlights in greyish hair would show the roots really badly. I went ahead and love the results! When my just below chin length bob style hair is freshly washed and shiny, the purple streaks show through especially when I move my head. I’ve had them done about four times now so the colour is quite well defined. I tend to have a trim every six weeks with lowlights done every alternate visit.

With the increased energy bills and food prices I did think about stopping but have decided not to, I’ll cut back in other areas if I need to as I feel much happier about myself now than when I was just plain grey. I am thinking of having two colours next time, the original purple and a lighter mauve or pinky colour - just to be different!

Yes, I'm fed up,with mine but don't want to do all over dying again as the roots show so quickly

I find my hair takes so much longer to dry when it has no dye in it

Ilovetocrochet can you post a photo? Your hair sounds amazing!

I have a theory that the grey should be a shade that suits you. So if you have Mediterranean tanned skin a steely blue grey suits you but if you are pale and pink skinned a blondey or soft grey is better.

No way. I wasn't a recent convert though. It's been nearly 10 years for me.

I love it.

I'd let my hair go natural but during covid my DC and I alll put blond in our hair. I did it as a stripe framing my face (do they call it a money piece?). When I finally got back to the hairdressers (with bad roots) they agreed the brightness framing my face was more attractive than natural. I've stuck with it. It lightens my face.

@Desmorelda what length is your hair? You need a good sharp cut to avoid the ‘given up’ vibe
but done well, grey is fabulous

Rude.

Me, I gave up. Grew it out for nearly 10 months, but the colour - pepper with a bit of salt, just made me look washed out even with loads of makeup, and I felt old. After I dyed it back to dark brown I ended up with loads of compliments in work the next day on how nice it looked. I think it depends on your colouring. I'm olive with dark eyes and need the dark hair for balance, I think paler complexions can transition much easier.

See I'm dark with brown eyes, sallow skin. I agree with the idea that the dark hair balances out your complexion.
I bought a curling wand at the weekend and put some more defined waves in. It actually looked really good, far less frizzy and more shiny/vibrant. I don't agree about a sharp cut necessarily being the answer as it wouldn't really go with my dress style (casual boho-ish).

I did early 40s. It was so aging and I hated it. Did the blonde highlights for 4 years and hair is trashed. It's awful. I want to go dark again just for a few more years. Hopefully then my hair will be a nice silver and not steel grey. Not looking forwards to the roots though, but I'm sure I'll feel much better about myself as I'll feel like me.

Gosh. 🤯 This is rude.

Yes. I've 'given up'.

Completely!

You probably just need to change up your make up and clothes to suit your new colour of hair. I'm letting my hair go grey and I have needed to brighten up my make up.

Your outfit looks fabulous.

Thanks @FurAndFeathers.

And here's my hair! I've not given up.

Grey hair can be very positive.

I adore myself.

I've always really liked myself.

Getting older isn't necessarily a negative thing.

Here is a photo of my purple low lights taken by my hairdresser, I love them!

That is amazing @Ilovetocrochet .

Beautiful.

I let my grey do it's own thing.

Yours is superb..