Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

Is this suitable?

58 replies

Percie · 10/04/2022 10:39

It's a loved ones funeral next week and I still have no idea what to wear. I've been looking for something long that keeps my arms covered and came across this.
Does the rose gold make it unsuitable? Is there an etiquette beyond black/navy I need to know?

Is this suitable?
Is this suitable?
OP posts:
ShirleyPhallus · 10/04/2022 10:41

That’s lovely and very suitable, (as long as you’re not planning on wearing those sandals with it)

Sorry for your loss

thisplaceisweird · 10/04/2022 10:41

It's rather glam for a funeral. Unless some mafia boss has died then I'm not sure I'd wear this. Do you not just have some simple black trousers and a blazer?

Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 10:42

Thank you.

No sandals, I have plain black court shoes which I thought would be more appropriate.

OP posts:
Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 10:46

@thisplaceisweird

It's rather glam for a funeral. Unless some mafia boss has died then I'm not sure I'd wear this. Do you not just have some simple black trousers and a blazer?
I don't have an outfit like that unfortunately. I have some sensory issues so there are quite a few clothes that are problematic for me. Long sleeves and long length are a must. I tried wearing black trousers and a jacket to a funeral previously and it made a difficult day harder.
OP posts:
KimikosNightmare · 10/04/2022 10:48

It's a bit glam for daywear , let alone a funeral. The funerals I've been to in the last few years weren't by any means a sea of black and navy. I think not being scruffy is more important than wearing black.

That dress looks like using a funeral as a dressing up opportunity.

Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 10:51

@KimikosNightmare

It's a bit glam for daywear , let alone a funeral. The funerals I've been to in the last few years weren't by any means a sea of black and navy. I think not being scruffy is more important than wearing black.

That dress looks like using a funeral as a dressing up opportunity.

Thank you - I'll keep looking. I absolutely don't want to stand out in any way.
OP posts:
thisplaceisweird · 10/04/2022 10:52

Is there a smart ish outfit you like to wear day to day?

A blouse of any colour, trousers and dark coat is the go to I think

Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 10:59

@thisplaceisweird

Is there a smart ish outfit you like to wear day to day?

A blouse of any colour, trousers and dark coat is the go to I think

I'll need to start looking at trousers and tops as I've mainly focused on dresses.

Since the pandemic I've moved to permanently WFH and so have just worn the clothes I find comfortable. It's been a huge relief because I spent so much time feeling uncomfortable at work before that, but I know my comfy stuff is totally wrong for a funeral. Unfortunately I donated my smart work stuff when I thought I wasn't going to need it any more.

OP posts:
KimikosNightmare · 10/04/2022 11:08

It's a very nice dress but wouldn't be my choice for a funeral. My funeral dress is actually a dark green lace dress worn with a black coat.

This isn't me but this was taken at a recent funeral.

Is this suitable?
Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 11:23

@KimikosNightmare

It's a very nice dress but wouldn't be my choice for a funeral. My funeral dress is actually a dark green lace dress worn with a black coat.

This isn't me but this was taken at a recent funeral.

Thank you - completely different to what I'd been thinking.

I like the idea of green/dark green and will add that to my searches.

OP posts:
WildCherryBlossom · 10/04/2022 11:29

I think that dress is lovely. I would wear it to a funeral.

user1497787065 · 10/04/2022 11:48

I think it is perfectly suitable and rather lovely. I can't see what is 'glamorous' about it.

If it makes you feel good and helps on a difficult day wear it.

shazzer1978 · 10/04/2022 11:51

I wore a pretty dress to my mum’s funeral. I didn’t glam it up or anything but it looked nice. I didn’t feel inappropriately dressed. It was a similar time of year. I’d wear the dress in your OP, it’s beautiful.

Minikievs · 10/04/2022 11:52

I think this would be totally suitable. It's a lovely dress. Sombre and fitting. I don't think it's "glamorous" either.
I think you could make it glamorous if you dressed it up but obvs you aren't going to do that for a funeral!
I'd possibly team it with boots. But black shoes would also work ok.

Pyri · 10/04/2022 12:08

@KimikosNightmare

It's a very nice dress but wouldn't be my choice for a funeral. My funeral dress is actually a dark green lace dress worn with a black coat.

This isn't me but this was taken at a recent funeral.

I think OP’s dress is more suitable than the outfit on the left tbh
notawittyname1954 · 10/04/2022 12:17

I think it is perfectly suitable and if you feel comfortable in it that is the main thing. You would look very smart.

Towelseverywhere · 10/04/2022 13:29

The dress is lovely op and I think fine. But I’d you are worried about the good bits then something similar in plain black would be good. Don’t wear trousers if they annoy you as you’ll fee uncomfortable and that’s the last thing you need.
For what it’s worth I went to a funeral this week, lots of black dresses, different lengths and styles, yours would not have been out of place at all

Towelseverywhere · 10/04/2022 13:29

I meant IF and GOLD. Sorry

Candleabra · 10/04/2022 13:35

I didn’t even wear black to my mums funeral. I think things are more relaxed now.

Original poster
Percie · 10/04/2022 13:43

Thank you all for the feedback. It seems a little divided which reflects how I was feeling.

I've decided to order this dress and a second one I've found that's plainer to try them both. I'll go with the more comfortable one. My relative was very lovely and relaxed but if there was a formal event she would always look stylish and beautiful - it feels important to try and do that for her, within my own limits.

OP posts:
Dammitthisisshit · 10/04/2022 13:48

I think it’s a stylish and beautiful dress, so based on your last post would be good. When you see it for real you can see how bright the gold is - from the picture it looks fine.

RMS0209 · 10/04/2022 13:49

@Percie hi I op I like it I would wear it and black court shoes. And a coat sorted x

HermioneWeasley · 10/04/2022 13:53

It’s fine with black tights and boots or black shoes and somber accessories.

I’m sorry for your loss.

shinynewapple22 · 10/04/2022 13:56

The last outfit I purchased specifically for a funeral was a midi length fit and flare jersey dress - black with small polka dots on . I wore with flat black shoes and a dark grey jacket .

During first Covid lockdown I attended two funerals wearing a dark grey jersey dress, tights,
Boots and just wore my parka style coat over the top as that was black . There were no 'after' events to attend.

Towelseverywhere · 10/04/2022 13:59

I see people here all the time saying black isn’t worn that much for funerals and I usually wear navy or grey but almost everyone at the funeral I went to recently was in black. And it was a relatively young persons funeral.
Nothing wrong with wanting to look nice op. My friend was very glam and I wanted to honour that somehow by wearing something nice. Lots of people felt the same.