I have barely any money, but need to look better!

[Macademiamum]

A couple of years of lockdowns, health struggles, depression and low self esteem, I have put on a lot of weight so none of my old clothes fit and not been shopping really so wearing a combination of massive baggy tops (from pregnancy), supermarket legging and old cardigans. I need to look better because it's having an impact on my socially and professionally and as a parent. I am losing weight (slowly but surely) and have started wearing makeup again. But I basically need a whole new wardrobe, on a lemonade budget but that looks smart and put together.

Kind of in the same boat here! Ive found nice things for very reasonable prices recently in Sainsburys (currently have a sale on, got lovely leather boots for £30, lots of midis/ maxi dresses and jumpers). H&M are always good for basics that can be accessorised up. New Look are also really good value, reliable sizing and have a good range of stock. Also pretty much always have sales on! TK Maxx can have some bargains if you can be bothered rummaging.

Good luck, hope you find some nice new things

eBay. I get pretty much all of my clothes there now. You can get some real bargains. I just search for brands I like.

I used to volunteer putting out clothes in a charity shop. We had lots of lovely bits. I visited a local affluent area with a friend and had a good clothes shopping experience in their charity shops.

We just told our friends we got our new outfits in a little boutique in So and So.

I really want to try everything on, look in the mirror and if it looks dreadful throw it out (or recycle/charity shop anyway) but I'm worried I will have nothing left and I have a feeling doing the school run or going to work in my undies or my pyjamas might be worse! I know I am losing work because I look so scruffy. I mean like faded clothes, clothes with holes in, things that don't fit. It is so depressing when I know I have smart casual clothes which would be perfect but are just 2 sizes too small. But I lost weight slowly so realistically could be a long time before I fit into them again.

I'm not sure I even know what I'm looking for. Kind of smart casual, with a hint of glamour. Instead of scruffy casual with a hint of homeless 😞

It isn't really about losing weight, I know I need fo do that for health reasons but I would much rather be making career progress instead of focusing on my weight. I just don't have the confidence. There are so many women my size of bigger that look fabulous, and not like a sack of potatoes

How do I work out what body shape I am or what might suit me? I don't really care about fashion, I don't want to look totally unfashionable either but more timeless.

I used to be able to get away with wearing skinny jeans, a baggy T-shirt, blow drying my hair and putting a face of slap on and look glam. I don't know if it was being young, slim and confident. I miss those days!

I think the problem is it's either a time or money investment and I don't have enough of either. But I'm going to have to make an investment in my appearance or it's going to get in the way of my other goals.

I might start with throwing those clothes out actually. Then I will be forced to do something! Might be the only way it happens. Or I'll just continue to walk around in baggy hole-y scruffy gear.

I'm embarrassed by my appearance it's not in line with who I think I am

What’s your budget? Could you sell the old clothes that don’t fit to buy new ones as it’s going to be difficult to buy a new wardrobe if you don’t have the money! I would start with a few key items that can be dressed up or down, nice midi dresses, good fitting jeans, nice jumpers that can be worn a variety of ways etc

What body type am I?
This woman has loads of ideas about cosmetics clothing and style.
Start with this one 👍

If I were you I'd go to the main clothes stores, try on loads of stuff and take note of the size you are in each thing eg jeans, trousers, skirts and tops, then go on ebay and search for those brands and order a few bits. Ebay works well if you know the brands sizing well.

I think step one is to work out exactly what kind of outfits you need. I used to buy so many dresses and jackets/blazers when in reality I'm a skinnies and sweater kinda person.
Figuring out the "what" will help guide the rest of it.
Smart shoes/trainers/boots, whatever suits you and your lifestyle, also help with looking tidier.

Also, I know it's a bit old school but take the body type quiz, Trinny and Susana do one and there's a host of other ones if you google. I'm a goblet so all boobs and a bit of tummy, but long thin legs, I tend to wear skinny jeans and low neck tshirts or shirt dresses. Things that show my legs but are fitted under my bust.

Clothes recycler for anything you would be ashamed to answer the door in. Grab a bag & get rid today.

Better to invest in one pair of black trousers that fit & you wear fairly contantly while you are losing weight.

Book a haircut / colour if needed - always makes people look better.

When you say it's losing you work - how do you mean? Have you got a decent plain shirt you can wear for interviews?

By the way I think where you are at is fairly common. I was similar after having kids and a couple of years as a SAHM when I didn't go out much, wasn't following fashion as much was living on one salary & basically grabbed comfortable stretchy shapeless clothes like leggings & tunics everyday. Once the kids were at school and I got back to work I started finding a more grown up style again and can afford to wear nice things again now I don't spend the day crawling around the floor! Saying that I have loads of nice workwear in the wardrobe that doesn't fit after 2 years wfh and comfort eating!

I agree, make sure your hair looks good, your nails are clean and neat. I am a big H&M fan: get some plain basics in black, navy and cream. What shape are you? Don't be down on yourself.

Sorry if it’s already been said, but get on Vinted. Cheap good quality second have clothes with good buyer protection.
Do you know how to make the most of your shape? Ie : empire line for apple shaped, always showing the waist of your hourglass or pear. O if you’re not sure Google something like’ dressing for body shape’ and find what will suit. Wrap dresses seen to be universally flattering.

Good luck, there’s nothing like a revamp for boosting confidence.

Placemarking so I can come back later and read the whole thread, I’m in the same boat (but currently undergoing chemotherapy and the steroids have piled weight on me ) and need a wardrobe overhaul, but if I throw away everything that doesn’t fit me I’ll have nothing left!!

Just been trawling through sainsburys(Tu), Dorothy Perkins and new look websites clearance.
You can get some great stuff at low prices. Just got a lovely pair of dark denim jeans for £7.30 (sainsburys)and a pair of black denim jeans for £6.80 (dp) plus other stuff at great prices. Don't pay for postage go for click and collect if you can and it's a win. I trawl on there most evenings and there's always different stuff on clearance
Facebook and charity shops are always great too.

I also put on weight during lockdown. Every charity shop charges different prices.

I was fortunate that the local Cancer Research charity shop sells clothes for £3 or less. I bought a pair of jeans for £3. I also bought a long length grey wool coat for £3.

The local Heart Foundation charity shop has clearance items, which either sell for half price or there is a bucket for £1 per item. I bought a Hollister skirt for £1.

The Hospice charity shop has a £1 rail.

Clothes from charity shops are great for the environment and kinder on the purse.

I'm 41 and I felt exactly like you describe after having kids.

What has worked for me is wearing make up all of the time. I can't get away with no/minimal make up anymore. It's a full face of slap or nothing now. Also having nice hair too. I kept toying with the idea of growing out my grey and I looked awful. When my hair is coloured, I look so much better.

For clothes, I feel much better when I dress smarter. I WFH now so don't need office attire. But jeans with a heeled boot and a fitted jumper or blouse makes me feel better than a baggy jumper and skinny jeans with converse.

If you're on a budget, Matalan has some good cheap smart bits, like cheap dresses you could wear into the office or blouses you could wear with work trousers or jeans.

I colour my own hair BTW for a fiver a month. You don't need to be dropping £300 at the salon.

Do you have a local college with hair dressing courses that require models? They charge a lot less than hairdressers.

I’d start by throwing a lot of your really old stuff out. Then do you have enough money to buy a few new bits from Primark? Some jeans/leggings/joggers and sweatshirts/jumpers perhaps or a midi dress and cardigan. Their stuff washes well and it’s a start. You could buy it all in a couple of hours compared to hours and hours looking though charity shops.

I have yo-you’d through the cycle several times of weight gain / loss / depression / lack of self care - it’s tough, and you have to be strict with yourself to make a proper difference. Some simple things that I find help me look and feel better are drinking plenty of water, taking a daily multivitamin, using moisturiser day and night (face and hands), always making sure my hair is clean. I have used the website everything5pounds which sells overstock clothes from large retailers to pep up my wardrobe - but also agree with PPs suggesting eBay / Vinted and FB Marketplace x

I find Uniqlo good for quality but budget basics.

My hair wasn't done that long ago actually (at the college) & I am happy with my natural colour. I had some hair loss alongside the Health issues, but it's come back through now thicker and looks good condition so I will be avoiding dye for the time being.

My skin I have a good routine and people actually comment on how good at is (not boasting, in my head they only do that because it's the only thing that is objectively not awful, but maybe not?) this is because I have started eating better and drinking lots of water, and doing a moderate amount of exercise.

For the first time in a while, inside I feel full of life and joy and creativity and ideas, and am just shocked that the vibrant person I feel like inside is not reflected outside. Outside I look browbeaten and forgotten and like I'm neglecting myself. Which I suppose I have been. Putting the kids ahead. It's shocked me to realise the state of my clothes tbh.

Budget wise I basically have no money to spend but I will have to find some! I have been selling what I can on eBay and am going to do some Facebook marketplace as well, at least bits like maternity clothes which I won't wear again and aren't totally knackered.

I did throw away four items this week because they had actual holes in (well, bagged them up anyway) for clothes recycling. I am loathe to sell some of my older clothes that don't fit in case I do get into them in the next couple of years because I did invest some time, effort and money in some 'timeless' pieces a few years ago, just for a different figure.

I have done lots of those quizzes but find they just confuse me further. Thinking about tinny and Susannah I can imagine what they would do with me! In fact maybe I should hunt out some reruns! They would get me in an underwired bra and some shoes with a bit of a heel and throw away almost everything.

I don't want to go on a Tv show or anything though, I'd be way too embarrassed. I just want to be seen as a grown up, a woman and a professional. It sounds simple but actually it's hard isn't it?