Have you ever had a 'cull' and regretted it?

[humptyspartyhat]

Had a massive cull of my clothes over lockdown last year. Gave about 15 bags to my cousin of jumpers, coats, Christmas jumpers, dresses, bags.. you name it. I loved the space but now I only have 3 jumpers, 1 scarf, hardly any bags and I got rid of a coat which I regret I did ask her for it back straight away but I think she's misplaced it. Massing kicking myself.
Anyone else made the same mistake?

Yes. I’m just glad I had the foresight to keep my sequinned trousers that I wore out on New Year’s Eve 1999. My daughter is going to look amazing in them. But I got rid of tonnes over the years and I miss some of them as they remind me of very fun times, especially the stuff from 1995-2005.

Omg yes. I had a lovely wardrobe full of plus sized but flattering clothes built over years of ebay finds, knowing my shape and size. Lovely colours, all tasteful.

Went on a crash diet, lost 3 stone. Took the advice to throw away your old wardrobe. Off it all went to charity shop.

Of course like 99% of dieters, I had regained all the weight within 2 years. I've been similar size plus or minus a bit for the next 5 years. 🙄

Never throw away a wardrobe of any size clothes.

I had the most amazing vintage coat - a sheepskin calf length number with a huge collar - that I still think of now. I got rid of it because it really needed cleaned, which was going to cost about five times more than I paid for it, but I wish I had just bitten the bullet.

Yes! Although the majority of stuff I get rid of definitely deserve to be binned

@anon666, yes, I hate that advice!

"Get rid of your clothes in a bigger size because you'll never be that size again". But, but... I was that size for years and I've only been this size for a few weeks? Logically, wouldn't you think there's a chance I'll go back to the old size at some point?

I swear it's a conspiracy to get us to buy clothes! adjusts tinfoil hat

See also, "I've gained weight but I don't want to buy too many things as I won't be this weight for long" (sensible).

Vs "You've lost five stone in six months, so you must bin your old wardrobe and buy all brand new in my your size which is totally permanent" (not sensible).

I have jeans in two sizes and all my dresses, skirts and tops can be worn at different sizes, as I tend to move between the two sizes pretty much all the time, even depending on being a bit hormonal, or having a day where I've eaten more than usual etc.

Anyway, massive derail, but your post just resonated with me.

@SuperSketchy

I know right? I can't believe I was taken in. As if throwing away clothes was any sort of protection against putting weight on again......

I had an amazing sequined dress from Whistles that I bought BNWT on eBay for about a fiver and wore it to loads of posh events. I got rid of it once I had kids as I thought I would never go to that kind of thing again (or fit into it)

I would fit into it again now and have had lots of occasions where it would have been the perfect outfit

Slightly different, but I also still mourn a sequinned playsuit that was in the French Connection sale about 15 years ago. I tried it on multiple times but it always felt just that bit too extravagant for teenage me. I still think about it and how good it looked!

Rtft so deserve my wallow, always ditch stuff when I move house which has been about 7 times in 10 years- regret what was an undeniably tatty hook and eye fronted top which id removed the frilly sleeves from, it was fitted and gorgeous and I’m so annoyed. Meanwhile DH has boxes and cases of stuff he never wears. My own fault!

But also keep looking on eBay if it was a branded item- I won back a silk H&M kimono which I lost at a restaurant and was so happy! Still wearing it

I had a beautiful ball gown that I used to wear for work black tie events. Decided I’d worn it enough and I should sell it.
I couldn’t actually remember selling it but thought I must have as I didn’t have it anymore. I was a bit gutted as we’ve got a New Years party it would be perfect for and I’m also now since deciding to sell it, trying to buy less.

Then last week, I discovered it in a suitcase and was so so happy so really pleased I actually didn’t end up selling it in the end.

I used to have cull regrets because I used to buy tons of stuff for the sake of it and so I would have to make room for the incoming stuff by getting rid of the old. I lost of a few really beautiful items this way. But I don't buy half as much anymore and my wardrobe is much more curated sorry, i hate the word too I'll only buy clothes that I need and is a perfect fit for me and matches other items in my wardrobe. Meaning that the outgoing stuff is usually because its totally worn out or it doesn't fit me anymore.

When we moved house I had a massive clear out. I do regret a couple of jumpers and 2 jackets I got rid of plus a few skirts that now I have lost a bit of weight would now fit. Oh and the biggest regret an animal print fake fur pill box hat that DH bought me for a wedding. I try not to think about them as I get very annoyed at myself.

Yes - I had a crisis of confidence a couple of years ago and was convinced that I was dressing too much like a middle aged primary school teacher, i.e. lots of bright colours and cheerful prints. I didn't want people to think of me as "fat and jolly" so I ditched quite a lot of it. I really miss a couple of the tops and skirts, particularly a summer blouse with a jungle animal print.

I also periodically miss a cream silk dress with a sort of watery red poppy pattern on it, which I had in the late 90s. In reality, it was bias cut, spaghetti strapped, and drape fronted so it would have screamed I'M FROM THE 90S!!!! if I were to wear it now!

Yes - I donated my favorite Kate Moss for Topshop tea dress 7 years ago because my Mum said it was faded. I miss it every summer.

When I was pregnant and had crippling antenatal depression, I donated loads of my vintage dresses because I thought I'd wrecked my body and that I'd never fit into them again - I also bought in to the myth I'd only wear "Mum Clothes" and my old life was over. 2 years later I'm the same size as before I had DS and still dress the same as before I had him .

I miss those clothes.

@allfurcoatnoknickers

Yes - I donated my favorite Kate Moss for Topshop tea dress 7 years ago because my Mum said it was faded. I miss it every summer.

When I was pregnant and had crippling antenatal depression, I donated loads of my vintage dresses because I thought I'd wrecked my body and that I'd never fit into them again - I also bought in to the myth I'd only wear "Mum Clothes" and my old life was over. 2 years later I'm the same size as before I had DS and still dress the same as before I had him .

I miss those clothes.

Yes, this is like the problem anon and I were just talking about, but in reverse! If you were a certain weight for years and suddenly gain weight, there is a chance you'll go back to your original size at some point. I was a little smaller when breastfeeding than I was pre DC. Gained some and went back to exactly what I was before DC. I think the lesson for me is, don't get rid of clothes because of a "new weight", if you've been the same weight for ages before. I mean, obviously, if you then stay the new weight for years that's different, but it isn't always the case that you will stay the new weight, whether it is the result of a loss or a gain.

@SuperSketchy I think you're right. I didn't even put on that much weight when I was pregnant, but my depressed brain couldn't think logically at the time.

I actually threw one of the dresses in the bin because the elastic went in the waist band :(. Still kick myself that I didn't get take it to a dry cleaner/seamstress to get new elastic put in, but again, not thinking straight.

No, but I don’t get rid of stuff very often. I’ve only just cleared out some old work clothes that haven’t been worn for 10 years and will never fit me again!

Yes, all the time. I don't have much space so I get clearout-happy and chuck things, then want them back. because of this I often umm and ahh about what to get rid of.

I have a TopShop printed top that I loved but eventually decided was not really my style any more and stored it away. Then I had a clearout and took stuff to the charity shop. A couple of weeks later I saw my Topshop top in the charity shop and regretted getting rid of it so bought it back. I later found I had two, as I had rescued the first one from the chuck pile, but forgotten about it.

I don't regret the clothes so much as the mindset that led to the cull. Most of the clothes were nothing special but I felt as though I was "too old" (early 20's!) to wear them. My ex's bad attitude and judgemental comments were dragging me down, but I couldn't see that then. I'd lost my carefree spirit, but thought it was growing up that had done it. I don't look any different now to how I looked then and the pandemic, in particular, has made me lose the "age appropriate" attitude. I took the "if nobody will see me what does it matter what I wear" approach in a different direction to most. While others were embracing hairy legs and tatty lounge wear, I was digging what was left of my oldest lovliest clothes out from the back of the wardrobe and wearing those. I've replaced donated things, reclaimed my old style and it suits me the same as it ever did.

The two items I miss are a pair of gold satin snakeskin print trousers from Joseph bought in the sale for £10 and a white bias cut cotton maxi skirt with lace goddets in the bottom from a stall at a county show, both of which I got rid of after not wearing them for years except once or twice. I loved them but didn't have the confidence to wear them and thought I never would. I was wrong.

PLEASED TO SAY I NEVER LET OTHER PEOPLE'S CLOTHING RULES OR LIMITATING BELIEFS DICTATE WHAT I WEAR.I WEAR WHAT I WANT TO WEAR AT ANY AGE.I PICK THE COLOURS I LOVE AND THE STYLES, SIZES, AND FABRICS THAT PLEASE ME.AND I NEVER BRING OTHER PEOPLE'S OPINIONS INTO THE EQUATION..UNLESS I AM UNSURE. MY SITUATION IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT. I WAS GIVEN CERTAIN PSYCHIATRIC MEDS. THEY MADE ME PUT ON 10kg. ALWAYS BEEN A SIZE 10 MOSTLY.EVERY DECADE. WAS ALSO MOVING AT THE TIME.BECAME HOMELESS. KNEW I WAS MOVING INTO A MUCH SMALLER EMERGENCY ACCOMMODATION AT FRIEND'S UNIT. I TOOK TWO LARGE GARBAGE BAGS TO OP SHOP.THEY HAD BEEN SITTING IN STORAGE UNTIL I WAS SURE I WANTED TO RELINQUISH THEM.WHEN I CAME OUT OF A MENTAL HEALTH WARD I IMPULSIVELY DROVE THEM TO OP SHOP. IT FELT LIBERATING- FOR A BRIEF MOMENT. LATER IT HIT ME WHAT I HAD DONE. THEY TOOK ME OFF THE MEDS THEY PUT ME ON IN HOSPITAL ( DUE TO THEIR HORRIBLE SIDE EFFECTS ). NEXT THING YA KNOW I AM BACK TO MY USUAL SMALL SIZE.AFTER BUYING A HEAP OF SIZE MEDIUM CLOTHES. I AM ALSO LIVING IN A NEW PLACE, A SMALL HOLIDAY VILLAGE WHERE THERE AREN'T THE RANGE OF CLOTHING STORES I HAD IN THE CITY. JUST ABOUT EVERY MORNING I AM TORMENTED IN MY MIND BECAUSE NONE OF THE CLOTHES I THROW OUT ARE WORN OR TORN. AND THEY ARE NOT REPLACEABLE.EACH SEASON'S CLOTHES ARE DIFFERENT. IT IS TOO EASY TO GET CAUGHT UP IN WHAT OTHER PEOPLE TELL US ON TV AND IN MAGS AND BOOKS ABOUT DE CLUTTERING. I BELIEVE THERE IS IT'S OPPOSITE PROBLEM- IMPULSIVE THROWING OUT OF TOO MUCH STUFF, OR THINGS THAT ARE SPECIAL.CAN BE JUST AS DETRIMENTAL TO THE HUMAN PSYCHE. WE EACH HAVE TO FOLLOW OUR OWN INSTINCTS.I WASN'T TO KNOW I WOULD FIT BACK INTO THEM A WHILE LATER. THERE ARE SO MANY DRAB CLOTHES OUT THERE. I PRIDE MYSELF ON COLLECTING BRIGHT, COLOURFUL ITEMS. GOING OUT AND TRYING TO REPLACE THEM CAN BE JUST AS FRUSTRATING AND DISAPPOINTING AS SO MANY STORE STICK TO SAFE COLOURS AND BORING PATTERNS. IT JUST ENDS UP COSTING ME MONEY TRYING TO FILL THE GAP. WHEN I COULD HAVE RELIED ON MY OWN OP SHOP AT HOME. I LOOK AFTER MY CLOTHES AND THEY CAN LAST FOR DECADES. WE TAKE TIME TO CAREFULLY SELECT OUR FAVOURITE CLOTHING ITEMS. AND SOMETIMES CERTAIN FAVOURITES WILL COST A BIT MORE. THEY COME FROM DIFFERENT SHOPS, IN DIFFERENT LOCATIONS. OUR CHOICES REFLECT OUR OWN PERSONALITY, QUIRKS, AND, UNIQUENESS , AND FREEDOM. THAT'S WHY WE MUST VALUE WHAT WE HAVE. NOT BE SO QUICK TO DISCARD JUST BECAUSE OF A WHIM, OR BECAUSE WE HAVE HAD THEM FOR A WHILE.SO WHAT?! SOME PEOPLE IN THE WORLD HAVE NOTHING. AND CLOTHES ARE MORE EXPENSIVE NOW. IT IS CONSIDERED VERY ADMIRABLE TO DONATE TO OP SHOPS. BUT IT IS NOT WORTH IT IF IT COMES AT A GREAT COST TO US. WE NEED THINGS TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT IN LIFE. NO MATTER WHAT SPIRITUAL GURU'S SAY. WE KNOW WHAT MAKES US FEEL GOOD. WHAT IS THE POINT IN DONATING A ONE OFF PRETTY FLORAL $90 MYER DRESS TO AN OP SHOP, ALMOST IN BRAND NEW CONDITION.ONE OF YOUR FAVOURITES IN YOUR WARDROBE.ONE OF THE BEST. AND THEN GOING WITHOUT? OR REPLACING IT WITH ANOTHER ONE ONLY HALF AS GOOD FROM ANOTHER OP SHOP. CLOTHING CAN BE A BIG PART OF WHO WE ARE. IT HAS DEFINATELY DONE MY HEAD IN THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE. AS I KEEP RECALLING ALMOST DAILY.....THAT DRESS...THAT PAIR OF SHORTS...THAT JACKET....THAT I CAN'T GET BACK. I LOST MY HOME.MY CAT RE EMERGED INTO PURE POSITIVE ENERGY. AND LOST MY MENTAL WELLBEING. ALSO MY CLOTHES. BUGGER DECLUTTERING.IT HAS ONLY CAUSED ME GRIEF. I'D RATHER BE A HOARDER AND KEEP MY FAVOURITE CLOTHES THAN SUFFER REGRET DAILY. THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THAN FIXATING ON THINGS YOU CANNOT CHANGE AND NOT KNOWING HOW TO STOP YOUR MIND FROM DOING IT. WHEN I WAS YOUNG MY MOTHER THREW OUT MY ENTIRE SHELL AND POLISHED STONES COLLECTION.ONE DAY I CAME HOME FROM SCHOOL AND THEY WERE GONE. NOW, I DIDN'T HAVE MUCH IN MY LIFE AS A KID TO ENJOY. SOMETIMES I THINK WE CARRY WITH US OUR PARENTS WAY OF TREATING US. AND WE UNKNOWINGLY SABOTAGE OURSELVES. WE DO THINGS THAT CAN HURT US BECAUSE WE LEARNED IT IN CHILDHOOD. WE LEARNED TO DEPRIVE AND PUNISH AND HURT OURSELVES. WE LEARNED TO PUT UP WITH FEELING BAD. SO MUCH SO THAT WE ALMOST UNCONSCIOUSLY FIND WAYS TO CREATE NEW SUFFERING.JUST BECAUSE ON SOME LEVEL WE GET USED TO FEELING THAT WAY AND IT BECOMES OUR NORMAL PATTERN. WE CARRY ON WHERE OUR PARENTS LEFT OFF. SO DEAR FRIENDS...I SAY....IF THERE IS ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE THAT MAKES YOU FEEL A LITTLE MORE HAPPIER, FREER, AND INDEPENDENT...THEN GO FOR IT! IT DOESNT MATTER IF IT IS A FAVOURITE PAIR OF SHORTS, A SCOOTER- TO HAVE FUN AGAIN.....WHATEVER! DON'T LET SOCIETY DICTATE HOW YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE ( THEY DO ENOUGH OF THAT NOW WITH COVID RULES ). BE VERY CAREFUL IN CONSIDERING WHAT YOU GET RID OF. TAKE YOUR TIME. AND WORK IT OUT FOR YOURSELF. YOU DONT NEED SOMEONE IN A GLOSSY MAGAZINE TELLING YOU WHAT'S RIGHT AND WHAT'S NOT. FIGURE IT OUT FOR YOURSELF.THEY AREN'T THE ONE'S THAT HAVE TO LIVE WITH YOUR FEELINGS WHEN YOU REGRET A DECISION. WE ARE ADULTS! THE BENEFIT OF THAT BEING WE CAN SAY YES! TO OURSELVES. WE HAVE OUR OWN PERMISSION. LET'S BE A LOVING PARENT TO OURSELVES. LIKE LOUISE HAY SAYS.AND LET'S ALLOW OURSLEVES TO HAVE NICE THINGS IN OUR LIVES...AND KEEP THEM FOR AS LONG AS THEY GIVE US PLEASURE. WE CAN'T CHANGE AND REVERSE SOME OF THE THINGS WE'VE DONE.BUT WE CAN LEARN FROM IT. I SURE AS HEAVEN WON'T BE SO CARELESS WITH MY CLOTHES IN FUTURE. BECAUSE I'VE LEARNT HOW CLOSELY TIED THEY ARE TO MY MENTAL WELLBEING. NO WAY WILL I DO THINGS LIKE THAT AGAIN THAT CAUSE SUCH ONGOING GRIEF. HARD LESSON TO LEARN. I REMEMBER NOTHING HELPFUL LEARNT IN ALL MY SCHOOLING YEARS. 15 YEARS OF BLANK. EVERYTHING THAT WE NEED TO LEARN HAPPENS ONCE WE LEAVE.THROUGH TRIAL AND ERROR. OFTEN WITH NO ANSWERS. WE STUMBLE BLINDLY. AND WE GO ON SITES LIKE THESE BECAUSE WE CAN'T GAIN SOLACE OR SOLUTION FROM PEOPLE AROUND US.INCLUDING MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS.

Socksy - most people struggle to read lots of upper case text. It looks like lots of shouting and doesn’t flow.

The only item I have ever regretted getting rid of was a lovely striped yellow mini dress. Sold it on eBay for about a tenner I think.
It was such an easy throw on dress (had pockets too!) not sure why I got rid, I had a massive clear out and was being ruthless.

Yes . I threw out loads of my beautiful vintage/designer dresses when I had antenatal depression. I was convinced my body would be wrecked and I'd only ever wear frumpy mum clothes and would never need a party dress again.

Turns out my body is exactly the bloody same as pre-baby and I've regretted every single dress I gave away/binned in that purge.

I also donated my fave Kate Moss for TopShop dress after my Mum said something bitchy about it. I regret that every summer.

Certain bits yes but I figure if I’d liked them that much then I’d have kept them.

Not being funny but what you culled and are left with is quite brutal!

a couple of dresses that my late mum made for me, probably wouldn't wear them but I regret giving them away, just for sentimental reasons, I do have one she made which I can no longer zip up but I'm so glad I held on to it. She was a great seamstress.