How can I have nice hair?

[Arsebucket]

Trivial I know, but it’s getting me down.

Is there anyway I can sort my hair out at home?

I had beautiful reddish brown hair, but I started to go grey at 30. So I stated dying it. I can’t afford to go to a hair dresser, so it was home dyes.

About 7 years ago, I really messed up and dyed it too dark.

and it’s stayed that way.

I’m now entirely grey under the dye, and my hair is a mess of different dyes (all dark brown, I stick to the same brand but it’s awful). They grey comes through so fast, ideally I would need to do roots every 3 weeks but Incant afford to buy a box of dye that often.

I don’t want to go grey, I’d look terrible.

I want lighter hair again, the dark brown just drags me down.

I’ve not done anything for a couple of months and now I have a halo of three inches of grey/white around my head, crappy dark dye on the rest. I feel so terrible about myself.

Like I said, I really can’t afford a hairdresser (I go for an £8 dry trim once a year, there’s no way I’d ever be able to afford to get it sorted professionally we’re just not in the position to).

How can I sort it at home? I’m 41 and I just feel like an old woman.

Superdrug have a range of £1.99 hair dyes - wash in/wash out - that are very effective. You only need to use a blob of the dye so one bottle can last a while. It doesn't hide the grey as such but it blends it.

At £1.99 I think it's worth a try, but you need to be realistic that you're not going to achieve a lighter look without bleach.

I think you should brace yourself for sacrificing six months to growing it.
The wash in wash outs can help you in the meantime.

Maybe when it gets cold again, that might be a better time to start growing out the box dies. You can style it out in a hat!

I think going to a salon and having it professionally died a walnut /dark blonde colour is the best solution. You're only 41!

Sorry, just read that you can't afford to go to a hairdresser regularly.

I would accept that you're going to have lighter roots for a while.

Start using lighter dies and it is going to look mismatched for a while but you'll get there.

I think going to a salon and having it professionally died a walnut /dark blonde colour is the best solution. You're only 41!

Very clearly says she can't afford to in the OP.

Are you sure grey will look awful? It might be your best option and grey is in , people are embracing their natural colour these days and tbh it looks much better. You won't make your hair lighter without bleach so not sure you have any other options.

@PearlNextDoor x post!

I was going to suggest the Superdrug wash in, wash out, it's called Colour effects, 2 for £3, I get the warm copper gold, I've had more compliments and better condition using this than spending at the hair dressers!

Offer to model at your local hairdressing college - it would be great for the students to see how to rectify this on a real head of hair. Even the big professional brands like Wella need models for this sort of thing when they do demo days for qualified hairdressers.

How much were you spending on box dyes? Could you save that up to get a decent cut? Your hair would then look better and healthier and would perhaps make it easier to grow the old dyes out and start again, especially if you have a decent amount taken off the length. In the meantime I also like the Superdrug wash in wash outs.

Given your financial situation, it’ll be hard to address the dye problems with home kits. Are you certain grey would look bad on you? If it’s all grey underneath, after the difficulty of growing it out, it could look good!

@MrsPelligrinoPetrichor I don’t want to be grey. I know some women love it, but to me, I’d just look and feel old.

@Rina66 I emailed a few colleges a while back and they have huge waiting lists and weren’t taking anymore people onto them!

Would the wash in wash outs work on grey though? I mean, my hair is almost white.

I hate looking in the mirror at the moment, I look so bad.

Once years ago, I had a horrible dye job with blue black - I just wanted to even out all the awful browns. I went with it for a few months but then I used colour b4 XL and it got it all out. Left me with horrible copper/grey hair but it was ok when i put a dark brown on again.

Maybe that’s worth another go. I couldn’t look any worse.

The only way to get rid of the dark hair is to cut it off, I’m afraid, and start again. I’m not what else to say. What % of grey are you? Salt and pepper or fully grey?

Not a great photo but this is the front of my head.

The lighter bits are my natural hair colour, the rest grey and then the back all the awful, dark dye.

Short bits at the front as I have a baby, I lost a lot of hair afterwards and it’s growing back with lots of grey and a bit of my natural colour.

The colour remover boxes are about a tenner. I would try and remove as much dark dye as possible and then put a lighter one over the top. It'll cover some of the dark and hopefully grow out into the new colour.

www.superdrug.com/Hair/Hair-Colourants/Hair-Dye-Remover/Colourless-Hair-colour-remover-Max-Effect/p/705718
This is the best one I've found. Follow the instructions carefully.

My real natural couloir is slightly darker than what is growing though with the rest of the greys.

In the past I've bought a kit to strip colour from Superdrug
My hair came out a gingery colour which actually was ok as I'm a natural ginger
You can buy loads of good timers nowadays so could put a toner on rather than another hair due to protect your hair a bit

Or I go to a hair academy and get colours for free nowadays but I guess if you neeed a lot of stripping first they may not be so keen
I have to go with an open mind so go on specific data where they do balayage or funky colours

Ah, have read that you’re almost white.

I understand about not wanting to go grey, however, grey hair is the hardest to cover. I am assuming your hair is all one length and quite long? I think you might have to cut it short and look into a more natural hair colourant such as Henna.

My friend's hair is the same as yours, she is best friends with a home hairdresser which helps with cost, but up until this year she's had her hair professionally dyed dark brown every 6 weeks for 20 years!

However, over lockdown she decided to let it go natural. What she did was get all the colour stripped out, then she bleached it blonde. Then she had highlights put through to blend the old blonde with the grey coming through, then kept going with that, keeping it short but blending it in regularly for about 6 months. At that point the roots were long enough to just have toners and cuts, toners and cuts. It took her 18 months but now it's all grey and she looks amazing.

However, if you can't face the grey, you could strip and bleach at home and just keep doing that? Once she went blonde it all became a lot easier.

This thread is moving faster than I can type.

Your hair doesn’t look too bad. But hair is a personal thing and you will only be comfortable when your hair looks the way you want it to.

@Ocsetldil

Ah, have read that you’re almost white.

I understand about not wanting to go grey, however, grey hair is the hardest to cover. I am assuming your hair is all one length and quite long? I think you might have to cut it short and look into a more natural hair colourant such as Henna.

Oh man, never short again!! I made that mistake years ago, I don’t have the face for it Honestly, I looked so awful my aunt cried when she saw me!

Yes it’s long and one length.

I don’t know, I look at women with beautiful hair and i’m so jealous! My sister in law has amazing hair but she gets it done professionally every six weeks.

I'm similar OP. I'm the same age too and it's shit.

Your choices are put up with shit hair for a year to grow it all out. Or get a pixie cut and cut all the dark hair off now. This means accepting the grey unfortunately.

Ask the hair dresser to bleach your existing hair. Which might not work if its box dye over the top. And it will be expensive.

Put box dye over it every four weeks. This is what I do. I do religiously use the same make and shade though. I use Live colour which is usually quite cheap anyway and is always on offer in Asda or Boots for about 4.50. Its not ideal, but it's better than being grey for now.

The other thing to consider is that most 'dark blonde' colours come out brown, so if you do strip your hair down and want to tone it, start at a dark blonde (number 7).

If you have a hairdressing wholesalers near you it might be worth popping in to see if they can give you any advice? Again, the independent wholesalers do demo nights, they might need you, you never know.

I don't know if you have the Nextdoor Neighbour App, but perhaps you could post something on there? A hairdresser may be looking to use a new product and need a model? Or a newly qualified might want a bit more experience?

I had a very similar problem a few years back, when I used box dye after box dye, my hair looked weird and I was SO grey. I used something called Stripper Stuff which took out loads of the colour (and frankly make me look like an aged ginger and grey tomcat for a week), and then put a nicer red-brown colour over it. It was a bit of a project, at a point where I had time but no money at all.

I would try the Stripper Stuff if I were you, and then put the colour you want back on after that.

I think i’ll try the colour remover first then. Like I did, last time it took out the really dark dye and left me with copper/grey.

And then try a light brown?

Agh. This is crap! I know it’s only hair, I do feel daft as it’s not a real problem. I just want to look nice for a change!

Any recommendations for. good colour remover?

Box colours almost always come out darker than expected. Put in a dark blonde if you want light brown.