Help me look less mumsy

[ChoChoCrazyCat]

I'm stuck in a floaty dress-leggings-cardi-side parting time warp. Have had the same look for the past decade...it worked for me but is now quite dated and makes me look frumpy. I'm early 30s and want to look stylish/vaguely fashionable but not like I'm trying too hard to be trendy, and I don't want to dress like a teenager.
Any suggestions for "looks" that would work? What is your style like if you're my age and a mum?

White leather trainers, jeans & tucked in T-shirt’s tend to be my go to during the weeks.

Sometimes add a scarf / swap trainers for sandals weather permitting.
Today I’ve worn a white tshirt with broderie anglaise sleeves, black leather high waisted straight leg trousers and white Valentino sandals.
Tomorrow it’s cooler so it’ll be back to jeans & trainers.

I don't think your age matters too much, what size and shape are you and what sort of lifestyle generally?

Do you have nice legs? A bit of a tummy? Big or flat boobs etc? Do you have young children that you're getting down to ground level with? Do you work? If so in what industry?

There's so many options for outfits but if all depends on your shape & lifestyle.

I'm tall, size 10-12, bit of a tummy now so anything with tight stretchy fabric is out...small boobs and hips, long legs, quite boy-ish body overall.
Have a young child so need to be comfy and move easily. I work in a creative industry but am still expected to look smart-ish (no jeans and trainers for work).
My go-to style apart from the one described in OP is skinny jeans, trainers and long, loose top. But that seems to be dated now too.
For work I normally wore the dress and leggings combo or skinny chino-type trousers with a loose top and ballet flats or loafers.
Any pics of styles? (Can be from Google)

A simple win with a bit of a tummy is to switch the long top to a waisted peplum wrap style top or blouse. You can add a statement sleeve to look less mumsy.
Wear this with looser leg jeans - either straight or cropped kick flare or Mom - and add mules with a 1 inch heel, trainers or sliders.
Add a slouchy long line blazer and a short cross body bag - high, closer to your armpit than your bum.

For work, same kind of style, but switch jeans for high waisted paperbag trousers or wide leg flares.

I like straight trousers or midi skirts + shirts or plain tops, something like: www.cosstores.com/en_gbp/women/womenswear/shirts/product.seersucker-shirt-white.0987747001.html

www.massimodutti.com/gb/women/collection/dresses%2C-jumpsuits-%26-skirts/skirts/vented-skirt-with-buttons-c675013p9104359.html?colorId=742&categoryId=675013

shop.mango.com/gb/women/skirts-midi/denim-pencil-skirt_87082517.html

www.massimodutti.com/gb/women/collection/dresses%2C-jumpsuits-%26-skirts/skirts/linen-and-cotton-denim-style-skirt-c675013p9259016.html?colorId=513&categoryId=675013

I wear a lot of floral dresses, mainly from New Look, with a sweatshirt, cardigan and trainers or boots depending on the weather. They are the tiered and empire waisted so easy to move in. I’m mid 30s.

I am not much help, I am size 12 and mid 30s mum to a toddler and still love a dress-cardi-flats combo. It's just sooo easy to put on and play/run around after little one. I alternate with converse, skinnies (I know, I know, but I love them) and a stripy tee.

would love to look more current but I just can't find a way to do it with the styles I'm seeing on (much, much) younger women.

@JMAngel1 I like that. What shoes would you wear with this outfit for work?
And what type of jacket?

@Pinkcadillac I like how they've paired the skirt with a T shirt...I always felt like I looked too formal with a shirt skirt like that but it looks more casual (but still smart) with the T.

I'm not on trend by any means but I'll tell you what I've changed. I've put the skinnies away and wear slim fit jeans. I've put my parting back in the middle. I avoid striped tees because I hate that mum uniform anyway. I've got a lush tie dye hoody but then I'm a bit of a hippy. Et voila! so far anyway. Its not stylish but any means but I feel less dated.

@Laundrydragon I feel the same...I think it's a sign of no longer being "the youth" when you look at current fashions and think "wtf".
I don't want to look like I'm trying to be down with the kids, but am also not quite ready for the head to toe M&S/Boden look. There seems to be so little in between.

I wear mom jeans and usually one of my husbands t shirts tucked in (nice ones!) and with other stories boots or a white trainer. I also have a cropped cardigan in pale pink that I wear as an over layer or when colder a leather jacket.
I have a bit of a tummy and think I always will so I’ve kind of embraced this about myself. The mom jeans give a nice neat waistline and a good fit around the arse.

What’s the issue with side partings? Because teenagers have centre partings, suddenly they’re dated?!
I’m not a teenager and have no desire to look like one.
Or am I missing something?

I feel sooo the same. Where are the clothes for 30 somethings?? Loads for 20s, loads for 50+, but I really struggle like I never used to.

I've started wearing coulottes and wide leg trousers, high waisted with a fitted top tucked in. I used to wear skinny jeans (still do a bit), with baggy tops but this new style seems to smooth my silhouette and is a lot more flattering. I wear them with converse or trainers usually but can wear sandals or ballet bumps too which would work.

I am short with a flat tummy but big bum, hips and legs though so quite different shapes.

Straight leg or wide leg jeans (I prefer cropped) or paper bag trousers.

Interestingly cut t shirt, or a boxy shirt, or a cropped jumper.

Just try to choose more interesting shapes and colours.

I like Other Stories, Monki, Zara and Mango.

I'm fond of loose fitting midi dresses at the moment. They probably aren't the best thing for my shape tbh, but I still love wearing them.

Usually with lace up ankle boots, but also with leather birkies on warmer days. I've gone off my white trainers tbh, so rarely wear those, but I do have black runners which I sometimes wear with dresses. I wear too much black though and that's my personal style rut which I'm currently trying to break out from!

@ChoChoCrazyCat I’m also in my 30s but I’m not a mum (yet - I’m 20 weeks pregnant) and I think I can see where you are coming from.

If you want to look less casual and more polished, I’d suggest some tweaks to your current outfits:

• if wearing a dress, either wear it with bare legs (weather permitting) or with tights rather than leggings, and with shoes that are a little bit “sturdier” than, say, ballet flats - could be a ballet pump with a small heel, or ankle boots. Depending on the look you are going for, wear a more polished Chelsea boot or another boot without a very chunky sole, unless that’s your style of course.

For that look, if your work environment is smart, wear a jacket rather than a cardigan. Play around with different styles, fits and lengths of jackets before buying one that really suits you.

• If you are wearing trousers, for work I’d go for fitted trousers like cigarette stile rather than skinnies or chinos. Most shops have a version of that, it can be called something like “fitted leg” or “slim leg trousers”. I also have a bit of a tummy and find that high waisted trousers suit me best (also because I have short legs). The fabric here is very important: avoid stretchy cotton as these don’t have a flattering fit on most people, and tend to fade/look cheap quickly. Go for ones made of wool (can be a mix of wool, elastane and something else, just avoid those with very high elastane content as they will fit almost like leggings on the thigh). The choice of top will really depend on your proportions, but try wearing a top that is loose-fitting overall but perhaps not too long - you’d want something that covers the trousers’ waist but not as long as a tunic. I would avoid ballet-type flats (those that are very flat, with no structured and made with soft material) and go for a more structured flat with a little heel, a sturdier material or which a slightly pointed or oval toe. Same for loafers: those that look very soft and too flat tend to look more casual than smart. It’s worth talking some time to research and find the right shoes as they can kill your effort in looking smart if they look wrong or too casual.

I want to stress that you need to find the proportions that work for you. I noticed that I can wear the most beautiful or expensive jacket, but if it’s too short I won’t look good. Same with the trousers’ rise and shoe style. Try a few clothes on in a shop (now that we can do this!) and take some pictures to see what works.

I recommend Trayslounge on Instagram. Her outfits are very wearable and mostly from affordable high street shops.

If you are on Facebook, I recommend a group called "the confidence Bible". People post ideas about outfits and I find it very inspiring

Or you could look at the Instagram videos of Styled By Sally. She's tall and slim, so she has good ideas for that body type

If you like the whole leggings/ tunic thing there’s no need to give it up. Just update. Asos have tons of smock type mini dresses that would look great with footless tights (snag do lovely ones) or leggings. Add some chunky white trainers (puma Cali lift or suchlike) and an oversized denim jacket. That’s the sort of thing I’m wearing at the moment- I’m 40 and a size 16. I can’t wear jeans due to disability issues (lupus, etc they all dig in).

@ChoChoCrazyCat
For the work outfit you could wear your loafers or I would personally wear either a pointed toe flat or a western style ankle boot with a heel to funk it up a bit. Something like an Ash style with the dip down at the front of the boot as it elongates the leg. Then the paper bag trouser turned up to expose a smudge of ankle. If wide legged trousers, then the pointed toe flat.
For a coat, either a voluminous trench or a long line blazer.

Thank you all, lots of really good tips. Will have a look around online for clothes soon to update wardrobe.