Alternative style in middle age

[tunainatin]

I think I need some help. I've always loved clothes but had an alternative style and not wanted/felt I needed to follow fashion. However, I am now undeniably middle aged, and I'm feeling that the clothes I'm naturally drawn to are no longer doing anything for me. For example, vintage/old lady dressed used to look cool, now they just make me look like...well, an old lady! I love quirky patterns and have some boden/seasalt dresses - they look beautiful in my wardrobe but on I suspect I look like a frumpy mum.
I have a nice figure, but I'm short and a size 12, quite hourglass, so it doesn't take much to make me look a bit plump. I'm thinking I might need to limit the patterns, and go for more of an 'edgy' look than a ditsy look.
I think I need some 'rules' to follow, so I don't end up buying stuff that looks much better off than on. I know what colours suit me, so that's a start. Would love to hear from others with the same kind of style perhaps. I've no desire to look 'polished', and no need either, work is fairly casual.
Thank you!

Cone to Glastonbury you'll see some alternative middle aged ladies here

[quote Thighdentitycrisis]@Branleuse
Thanks I’m a 10 and think I’d go for medium
What is the fabric like? It says polyester which can be ok but can be horrible too!

Sorry for multiple questions[/quote]
they dont feel like polyester, they feel cottony/linen to me. I dont think theyre polyester. I think some ebay sellers dont label stuff correctly. I think theyre good value

Billie and blossom skater dresses (was Dorothy Perkins but can get on eBay etc). With thick tights/cable knit tights and DMs.

Or if you pick well Yumi. www.yumi.co.uk/ax-paris-floral-ditsy-print-milkmaid-dress
This type of thing, (I’d probably prefer it a bit longer but it’s to give you an idea),
I’d dress that down with a biker jacket (scuffed), thick black tights, 18 hole DMs. You can pick up yumi second hand too.

www.dorothyperkins.com/black-ditsy-print-frill-hem-mini-dress/AQQ13213.html

Or this: www.dorothyperkins.com/khaki-organic-cotton-t-shirt-dress-/AQQ41199.html

www.dorothyperkins.com/navy-beth-mini-dress/AQQ16218.html

I’d dress all these down too. White converse or dms plus a biker jacket! Patterned tights if the dress is plain or you can get away with it.

@Branleuse

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/233956598614?var=533601077702 Im in love with these trousers at the moment. Ive got 2 pairs, which look a bit more hippyish under long tops than leggings and more forgiving

I’ve had those on my watchlist for ever. Thanks to you I’ve just pressed the button on them.

It’s true that sometimes we stop and take stock a bit because what we used to love no longer seems to work. That said, only change things if you are genuinely ready to move on - don’t censor your style because of some idea that you ‘should’. I love a tunic dress over slightly looser trousers and give not a stuff if others think it offensive to the eye. I’ve sold a lot of things on eBay over the past year as they no longer feel right and I got to the point of wanting a few slightly more ‘classic’ things in my wardrobe alongside the oddball bits and pieces.

An inspirational person to follow is Alternative aging on Instagram. Much older than you I'd say, but definitely doing alternative style into later life.

I think that as you get older you have to be more considered in your approach. I'm a casual, jeans-and-t-shirt type of woman, but as I turned 40 I realised I didn't look so good in 'just' jeans and a t-shirt, so I instead 'upgraded' the t-shirt to a blouse instead. Works for me.

If you're an hourglass, I'd add belts, and maybe the occasional more 'formal' piece, say, a well-fitted jacket.

I don't know if it's been mentioned already, but have you tried www.gudrunsjoden.com/en-gb

I love Popsy Clothing for comfy, flattering dresses that area it different in terms of the prints. Loads of different prints and styles so you should find something that works. My style is kind of vintage. I love tea dresses and fifties style dresses and tend the pair them with docs (boots and shoes). I'm middle aged (although desperately in denial still!) and i think this look works. I wear tights sometimes bright colours for when I need to be smarter then leggings for more casual . I've found I've stopped caring about if I am dressing my age etc and more about feeling comfy and happy in what I wear as I've got older. I'm also a size 12 hourglass but got a bit of a belly thanks to the kids (and cake) and I find these style of dresses super flattering.

Link to Popsy

www.popsyclothing.co.uk/

You can usually size down, they have pockets and don't need ironing. I've got quite a few now

Mmmmm too many rules and you end up beige and boring - I just go for simple well cut styles, one or 2 colours and no "comedy items", I think the only rule for older women is to wear good natural fabrics, silk, linen, cashmere and merino - much kinder when your bodily thermostat is bit on the blink

Interesting thread.... I love the All Saints slightly edgy look but the colours are very muted or black/white. It does my complexion no favours - but I still wear their stuff! Maybe try added a studded belt (from All Saints) or look at Sézane? Still a bit floral/vintage but more edge than Boden and Sea Salt! Also - I realise stuff I like is more expensive than I think it 'should be' now - and not always fab materials (£165 for a viscose dress from Whistles seems a bit much even though I like it).... So I am thinking of spending a bit more and buying v v little every season. Quality not quantity. I think if you introduce some slightly edgier/less 'ditzy' stuff to your current wardrobe, that would be a great look!

Sorry if it has already been mentioned as I've only read p1 (due to many interruptions). Have you looked at hellbunny clothing? Some vintage styles but more quirky patterns.

I was just coming on to say Popsy too. I like quirky interesting clothes but due to my job they can't be too way out there. I've never worn dresses before but I love the Popsy patterns and the styles are really flattering and comfortable. Their tights are fab too, so I'm slowly building up a collection of bright funky coloured tights.
And the dresses all have pockets!!!

Placemarking with interest.

@Branleuse I've had my eye on those trousers. What would the minimum height be to pull them off do you think?

I think mixing unusual colours can be really fun. Forget all the standard colours and think more like olive green, plum etc.
It's easy to fall into a uniform and good to mix stuff from different styles. Classic piece with bohemian. Or lagenlook with something very sharp.

A couple of Instagram recommendations from me cabbages and roses, very expensive but they look sounds right so might inspire you. And instagram.com/arabella_designerwear?utm_medium=copy_link

They do insta lives trying on loads of styles and all of them are different sizes and heights. Expensive but may give you inspiration

Apologies if this has been me tinned but I love Get Cutie. Gorgeous clothes, vintage style and plenty of fabric choice.

getcutieboyparker.co.uk

I have an alternative style and I'm 52 (my ex-h always said I dressed like a student). I'm also an Apple shape so I do tend to wear a lot of dresses with Snag tights and DM boots.

I'm in a similar position @tunainatin I understand what you say about your budget, I would suggest looking for these brands on eBay.

Nu
Free People
Anthropologie
Auro Belle

I second third? All Saints.

Be selective, choose one piece that is quirky and keep the rest of your clothes plain.

When I first started watching Game of Thrones I remember thinking how lovely some of the costumes were. I would love to be able to sew, when the world gets back to normal I'm going to take a class, but I would be decades away from being able to make beautiful clothes like your coat.

Incidentally OP, I'm not sure whether anyone has asked - where did that coat come from originally? I'm always looking for new brands producing slightly quirky styles.