Alternative style in middle age

[tunainatin]

I think I need some help. I've always loved clothes but had an alternative style and not wanted/felt I needed to follow fashion. However, I am now undeniably middle aged, and I'm feeling that the clothes I'm naturally drawn to are no longer doing anything for me. For example, vintage/old lady dressed used to look cool, now they just make me look like...well, an old lady! I love quirky patterns and have some boden/seasalt dresses - they look beautiful in my wardrobe but on I suspect I look like a frumpy mum.
I have a nice figure, but I'm short and a size 12, quite hourglass, so it doesn't take much to make me look a bit plump. I'm thinking I might need to limit the patterns, and go for more of an 'edgy' look than a ditsy look.
I think I need some 'rules' to follow, so I don't end up buying stuff that looks much better off than on. I know what colours suit me, so that's a start. Would love to hear from others with the same kind of style perhaps. I've no desire to look 'polished', and no need either, work is fairly casual.
Thank you!

Time40 I think you may have hit the nail on the head there. Less floral, more monochrome (black and grey really suit me). I'll have a look at All Saints and also the decades before the 60's 70s and 90s (50s and 80s not to my taste anyway)!

I know exactly what you mean OP - I can picture your style now as it's similar to how I used to dress. Well done for carrying on with it, I've gone into mum uniform of jeans and tops and feel very dull.

Vintage inspired looks are a good idea - maybe not the whole thing so it looks like dressing up, but a vintage style trouser or blouse with otherwise modern clothes? House of Foxy have some lovely pieces like Weekend Doll.

Or if you like the layered style you could try Lagenlook - it's very 'art teacher' and I think looks great when done well. All Saints is a good idea, maybe combine the two so like pp suggested, monochrome layers with statement silver jewellery and a really sharp haircut.

I think doing one thing only is a good rule (though who wants rules, ugh). Pinterest might help, if you scroll through loads of looks you might find some you can emulate.

Alternative style isnt just dressing in chains and goth stuff. Plenty of boden or seasalt stuff can look quirky, as can stuff from anywhere. Depends how you wear it too. Its kind of alt-lite

Have you looked at stuff like gudren sjodren and those lagenlook type oversized italian clothes. I think they look kind of art school teacher, which I like as i get older, although I cant say that I stick with one partucular style for long

Keep the dresses but swap the jeans for colourful tights, or even thick black. In nicer weather, nude fishnets can be cooler.
What do you wear on your feet? I’m middle aged and a big fan of ditsy pretty dresses with a biker jacket and boots - the mix of pretty and edgy works for me.
Dresses that fall below the knee are easier to wear with bare legs (I still wear boots or white trainers with them). Denim jacket if I’m going more spring casual or warm coat if it’s winter.
You can add quirky handbags, brooches, scarves etc. Earrings make a difference to your outfit.
I’ve reverted back to a grown up version of my 18-year-old wardrobe - think what you wore in the 90s!

@Branleuse Alt-lite is a good description 😄

I reckon youd like some of the run and fly pinnies maybe.
I also think some of that style youd get great knitwear in that style from fatface and h&m is great for layering tops etc ( i cant fit in their jeans though)

I know what you mean.
I found that the proportion between my waist and hips changed subtly and it took me a while to catch-up. It is easy to look uneven if you are dressing in a style that suits a body that has changed.
I also found this is about perceived intentions. As you age it is harder to be seen as free and playful in your clothing choices.
I chose my own route. I wear less pattern now but more colour blocking with bold colour. I hint at my hourglass figure and don’t cinch.

I think I’m having the same kind of issue. I’ve ended up looking at the 30s for inspo too, but am waiting for my second vaccination before I hit the hairdresser. I do think hair really helps when you’re trying to pull a new style together.

I like the same sort of style as you OP. Recently I’ve discovered Skirt Fanatic which have lovely unusual skirts and also Laundry B who have a more Lagenlook/alternative vibe to them.

skirtfanatic.com/

www.laundryb.com/

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/233956598614?var=533601077702
Im in love with these trousers at the moment. Ive got 2 pairs, which look a bit more hippyish under long tops than leggings and more forgiving

Thanks for the suggestions, I'm looking forward to exploring all these new shops later!
I do like lagenlook, my mum pulls that off really well (in her 70s) but it is quite loose and whole I've still got my nice figure I'd like to keep things more fitted.

squeejit yes, I'm with you there, I'd love a more 90s version of my little flowery dress, Stripy tights and docs!

Spotted cool mum on the school run in faded skinny jeans and oversize vintage jumper. I might be able to pull that off.

I think this is one of the problems with alternative style - after a while it stops being alternative and begins to feel a bit staid.

It sounds as if you haven't got a definite look in mind so, until you do, I'd try just changing one thing at a time.
E.g. swop the ditzy patterns for more abstract prints.
Or push it more and go full on clashy clashy with your patterns.
Or colour block as others have suggested.
Or try longer length dresses - not as 'busy'. (Also and for what it's worth, they're more authentic as tea dresses were below the knee.)
Team with boots instead of jeans. I wore skinny jeans with dresses for quite a while so I'm not against the look but the jeans add bulk, as can middle age, so it's a double whammy.
Or go for interesting shapes and texture instead of prints.
And so on. You've clearly got a good feel for style and colour so just keep feeling your way.

I don't bother much with Pinterest any more but I do watch people all the time and most of my ideas are nicked from them.

And ask your mum - she may well have been on a similar journey.

@tunainatin

Time40 I think you may have hit the nail on the head there

• I'm middle-aged too, and I had a strong feeling from what you said that we had similar tastes!

... ooh, and a (possibly) final thought: one thing I really, really love is multicoloured vintage floral prints on a black background. It's quite hard to find items like this that are exactly right, but when I do, I'm so happy. I think they are probably my favourite look. I'll see if I can find you a photo of the sort of thing I mean.

... this sort of thing. Obviously, this is a Marmite sort of thing. Personally, I love them, and they suit me:

I absolutely love those sorts of prints too @Time40. 😁 Colourful floral with a black background is like catnip to me. Have you seen any in the shops lately? I'm too big for most proper vintage, sadly.

@Branleuse
I keep seeing those trousers and quite fancy them! I also not keen on wearing leggings any more and have some nice tunics and dress things I’d like to wear
Good to have a recommendation, what is the sizing and fabric like?

[quote Thighdentitycrisis]@Branleuse
I keep seeing those trousers and quite fancy them! I also not keen on wearing leggings any more and have some nice tunics and dress things I’d like to wear
Good to have a recommendation, what is the sizing and fabric like?[/quote]
Well im about a 14/16 and bought XXL and theyre perfect

[quote Thighdentitycrisis]@Branleuse
I keep seeing those trousers and quite fancy them! I also not keen on wearing leggings any more and have some nice tunics and dress things I’d like to wear
Good to have a recommendation, what is the sizing and fabric like?[/quote]
Well im about a 14/16 and bought XXL and theyre perfect

@Branleuse
Thanks I’m a 10 and think I’d go for medium
What is the fabric like? It says polyester which can be ok but can be horrible too!

Sorry for multiple questions

What about Plumo or Toast? Have you looked at them?

Closet and Botts is another place that has some nice vintagey type pieces. Similar to Toast in style.

www.closetandbotts.com/collections/summer-wardrobe-2021

I really like a lot of the shops suggested but they are way out of my budget, I get most things ftom charity shops or ebay, but it's giving me ideas of what to look for. A lot of edgy stuff seems to have a boxy style though, which really doesn't suit my shape.