I often look scruffy. What easy steps can I take to look neater?

[Ferrisbuellersdayoff]

I'm often at the school gate with unkempt hair, a down-filled walking jacket, old, bobbled top, jeans that don't fit, amusing socks from accessorize and scuffed shoes. I work from home most of the time. When I have to go to see clients, I wear dresses and try to look tidy (but still end up with ladders in my tights and looking a state) but when I'm running errands and on the school run, I feel really awkward and messy. It doesn't help that I'm about a stone heavier than I like, and my hair is greying because I can't dye it at the moment. What can I do to smarten myself up and feel less dowdy? I'm 5ft 6 and a size 12, pear shaped with a massive mummy tummy that makes me want to cry, so I have to try to hide it.

@Summatsummit I think a lot of people confuse the widest point of the thighs for 'hips' even though they clearly aren't! Hips are much higher!

That's interesting...when I was being measured for my wedding dress they measured around my widest part (thighs/bum) and noted if down as my hip measurement. Since then, I've always measured there when trying to translate clothes sizes. I wonder if maybe I've been going wrong!

Hips is a polite way of saying your arse when it comes to dressmakers taking measurements

@MadameF Size 12 is not slim !!!!

OP asked about dress tips. If you want to bark about exercise then start your own thread. You're a bloke right???!

I lived between the EU and the UK & there are plenty of size 12 ++ French women and in Germany too.

Scarves for example, were perfectly invented for some of the issues OP describes.

In the winter it's easy.
I have an ankle length overcoat - quite smart, but cost £1:50 from a charity shop. If you have long hair, tie it back in a smooth ponytail.
Throw on a colourful scarf & you could be wearing your nightie underneath, and nobody would know. (I've literally done this).
Grow out the grey - it's fashionable these days. If it bothers you whilst it's growing out, buy one of those root-covering sprays.
In the summer, jeans and an A-line tunic cover a multitude of sins.
Finally, sod everyone - I'm sure you look fine.

Wtf, ladyjadie?

Jumpsuit looks great on you with red shoes! I think stripes in jumpers look naff. Maybe try Chelsea boots as I find mid-length boots look scruffy on me.

I am a UK size 12 and, when I am not working, I live in breeches, skinny jeans, or knitted leggings, short boots or wellies a baggy jumper and a gilet or a parka. I don’t give a rats arse about looking put together. I just want to be able to ride or walk my dogs in comfort.

When working (reasonably grown up job) I wear opaque tights, a loose dress, and black brogues. I cut my own fringe and don’t bother with makeup. As long as I am clean and presentable, my appearance is irrelevant.

I hear you!
I'd say invest in some good, new basics. New tights (I find M&S or Asda control-top tights flatten my mum tum), new coat (Uniqlo or M&S have some nice ones for £50-60), and a pair of brogue shoes. I also have some nice plain black yoga trousers from Bam, these are a step up from tracksuit bottoms. Pull hair back into a ponytail and you've made a great start!

Keep going with the options pics OP, some of them are looking great, and you can see it's sometimes the tiny details that make a difference. Jumpsuit is great, boatnecks great, visible socks kill it every time they are there! Your red shoes look great, or the brogues (no socks). If you don't want to suffer for your newfound art though, go to boots with trousers if you can't bear the chill of sockless at this time of year! The watch is dragging every outfit down for some reason - maybe a small (cheap) dress watch for when you want to look more slick?
Personal shopper idea is great - good ones will cut to the chase of most of this in a couple of hours. You don't have to buy anything (maybe 2 items to be polite!) but can reflect on their suggestions to help with a wardrobe cull and focus on shapes & colours they suggest for anything new you buy from anywhere in future.
The difference in some of the pics is amazing, you have a great body which is responding well to being dressed to show you at your best! Envious

Thanks @MeandT - I'm slowly reinventing myself and feeling a lot better. I may do some pictures this week.

@SouthernComforter I definitely need new tights (and socks 😳). Control tops are probably the way forward!

@potterylottery I think jumpsuits are awesome.

@simiisme grey looks awful on me - I'm very fair, so I sort of disappear with no colour near my face.

@notquiteruralbliss I love that you don't care what others think. I'm vain and want to fit in, and I live in a town, so can't get away with country casual.

@ everyone going on about my dress size - I definitely want to lose weight. I'm at the upper end of normal for my height, but that feels big for me. It's partly because I seem to store my cakes and pies in my thighs, as many have pointed out (I now realise why trousers always look a bit shite on me).

@MadameF I'm a size 8 what size you? coz you sound highly irritable so maybe you should eat a bit more?
If you want to start a new thread on how the not slim are all brainwashed by the clothes companies then I'd read it NOT

Ignore all the size talk I've been everything from from a size 6 to 10/12. Currently I'm in between 10 and 12 due to eating 10 boxes of mince pies & celebrations at xmas

I've had the most compliments at my current size, a bit more curvier with a fuller face. At size 6, clothes would hang off me & I'd need safety pins to hold waistbands up. My face was gaunt and I didn't look good but now I look healthier.

Posted too soon. But at a size 10/12 and 5"4 I'm still slim but not gaunt. Size 12 looks different on different people as far distributions vary widely. All sizes should be celebrated, women get it in the neck from society for all sorts of reasons. 0lease just lay off the size talk.

Goingg back to the reason of the thread, I think your outfit choices are getting smarter op, well done.

Fat distributions not far distributions

I would have your figure any day OP rather than the other one suggested as an ideal.

I think the other lady on here banging on about weight has an issue because she is disproportionately heavy on her legs and thinks she has to keep herself rail thin to detract. As others have said she has a completely different shape to you....

I think you look absolutely lovely just as you are. Clothes wise the only thing that doesn't look the best is the wide leg style- although you can even pull that off.

Right I have had another look through re clothing. I think that your best looks are tucked in and belted. Love the boat neck.

However I think there are two issues with the tops you are wearing-they are too short for your frame and the quality is off. I think you need tops that skim and fall below minge level- ideally boat neck.

Jeans wise how about slim leg ones rolled up a bit?

I also like the long boots/skinny jeans tucked in look.

I know it gets a lot of stick on here but a nice tunic can look great and make getting dressed easy. I normally avoid it like the plague but there are a couple of Boden things that might work as I think that cut for your figure type...... also a nice boat neck for tucking in....

Might be worth trying?

I think this might be a nice silhouette .

Cropped cardigans were made for your shape too.

@Ferrisbuellersdayoff I am the same shape as you (though did lose madameF’s magical stone lately and am therefore smaller but since it was at the expense of mental health I’d rather have kept it on balance) and also work from home with meetings with ludicrously glamorous people scattered between. I got rid of all the long sleeve t shirts - no more Gap; they’re always scruffy regardless of neckline. For tops, go v neck and for drapey fabrics Zara is brilliant, or the Henley style silk tops from Gerard Darel (some left in the sale - they’re a great buy at half price) ditto Claudie Pierlot which is also mid sale now (and whatever Madame f says, those French brands both have sizing that correspond properly with equivalent uk).

If it’s picking up on the school run that you are particularly concerned about then I would start by investing in a decent coat that you can pull on to cover whatever it is you are wearing. I don’t see a problem with grey hair, but get a decent cut - long grey hair can be ageing - or at least tie it up neatly. Invest in a decent pair of boots and keep them polished (get one of those shiny sponge things they provide in hotels and give them a quick wipe every time you take them off). If your go to uniform is jeans and tops then chuck out your unfitting, bobbly stuff and get some new, well-fitting ones - size 12 is not big, but wearing jeans which are too tight will make it look as if you are bigger than you are. Lose weight if you feel you need to, but you can still look good in the meantime.

I think I'm bad at casual clothes and smart casual that isn't a dress - basically I can't put separates together in a stylish/tidy way. The school run is where it's most obvious to me that I have been looking dishevelled, but it's whenever I go out in casual clothes that I have been looking a mess.

Not sure if anyone has mentioned it, but you can get hair dye from Holland and Barrett that has fewer allergens in. It might help, once you decide to dye your hair again.

@SummersMahoosiveClipOnFringe proper bitchy post...how on earth did that other lady have "disproportionately large legs"?! Her figure was stunning!

Whatever.....I don't see it that way.