can anyone help style my 18 year old DS please?

[mckenzie]

He is about 5ft 10 and quite chunky. He has man boobs and is carrying some extra weight due to liking his food, a sedentary job, not doing any exercise, eating out of boredom maybe, lack of self esteem.

He's going out now a couple of nights a week, to the local pub with his mates which is brilliant; we are really pleased. We want him to get out and socialise and have fun.
The trouble is, he doesn't have a going out wardrobe. The last two nights he's been in trackie bottoms and a t shirt with a bomber style jacket that he had for Christmas about 4 years ago.

He has no interest in clothes and hides inside them, which I guess is understandable as I think he doesn't like his body shape very much. But I think with the right clothes, he could look fabulous which will then increase his confidence and self esteem.

But I'm no style guru and don't know where to start. He does have some black jeans that fit him well and some short sleeve shirts that MIL has bought him for various Christmas and birthday presents but the shirts aren't Friday night local pub wear are they?

Jeans and a hoodie?
jeans and a polo? But nothing tight fitting. Dark colours really suit him.

Anyone care to help me help DS? I love him so much and hate seeing him feel inadequate next to his slim and trendy friends.

TIA

Jeans , good quality shirt and a casual jacket + good pair of boots. Avoid T shirts and polo shirts as these will enhance his man boobs. . Jacket should be wool and good quality . Chinos first when he takes someone out

Shops/brands I think he could look great in, especially if he is bigger

Finisterre have the nicest crew neck sweaters and t shirt basics and fat face also do really nice organic cotton t shirts.

He wants a slim fit rather than super oversized or baggy. As that accentuates rather than flatters.

Some hiking type boots are very in.

ASOS is a good place to start for looks.

I second the PP who said about Next Jeans - the straight legged ones are great and not skinny at all. My DS lives in them.

T shirt and Hoody. Head to TK Maxx if you have one near you. We have picked up a few bargain hoodies in there.

My 18 year old wears loose jeans rolled up to ankle length (in a way I hate-grr). He has a lot of plain T shirts (Fruit of the Loom from Amazon because they are thick and good colours) and wears long or short sleeved shirts patterned or check shirts-often from charity shops- over the top. He also has several huge hoodies.

If he wants to improve his style, download Pinterest. Search "teen boy fashion/ male fashion" and have him pin some ideas.

This is sort of look the young adult lads round my way wear

By longline I mean the sort of length that this model wears

If his friends are trendy please don't buy clothes from fat face , white stuff , next etc they're for 30 plus not youngsters.

Think river island , topman , sports shops , ASOS

Adidas hoodie with or with out zip front or another brand. T's long and short sleeved. Skinny jeans.

Shirts with a plain T to go under it.

Do you have any outlet shops near you?
My ds lives a brand name t shirt and like others have said the darker colours will be better for your DS.
Asos are doing a promotion where you pay £10/15 per year and get all your deliveries next day at no extra charge.

Skinny or slim leg jeans. They look good on a thick thigh.

thank you
thank you
thank you

I'm a tad tearful if I'm honest at how helpful and supportive you are all being. Life is tough for DS for all sorts of reasons and it breaks my heart to see him unhappy. I know clothes aren't the be all and end all but I do think that if I can get him to look and feel cool and trendy it might help his self esteem. He walks into a room hunched over with his body language asking if it's ok for him to be there and I would so love for him to walk in with his head held high, being proud of who he is.

I'm going to do some more research based on all of your ideas and then show DS and see if I can get a reaction and some positive interest.

DS2 is a kayaker and early 20s. He has quite a muscley chest. He likes plaid long sleeved shirts - and has quite a collection , some seem to be a brushed fabric. He shops in Primark, Uniqlo, Asos and M&S (!).Wears them with jeans or sometimes dark chinos. He also likes plain linen mix shirts with jeans or chinos.

Slim leg jeans, boots, a good quality plain T-shirt with a shirt as PPs have mentioned above or denim shirt left open.

Avoid anything baggy and the cheap online show such as Boohoo as they’re really thin.

Topman black jeans. They come in lots of types just avoid skinny. My rugby playing son likes with huge thighs likes the tapered fit.

Also rugby tops, can't remember the make but think they do them in house of Fraser, north face T-shirts because they fit well or anything other than next or white stuff etc.

Better to be plain than anything like super dry.

Pair of Nikes or Adidas, forgotten the ones they are all wearing but plain white or black and he's good to go.

Also navy looks good on anyone. A plain navy tommy hilfger would be nice, the ones with just a tiny flag on one side where the pocket used to be.

(Pockets on T-shirt's are a no no apparently)

If he likes jogging bottoms and t shirts, I'd get him some baggy cargo pants,thicker t-shirts. Get him a beanie for the colder weather and some Timberland boots. How old is your dad? Maybe she could go shopping with him and help him choose so he's not trailing around with his mum choosing his clothes. Definitely do. It buy him clothes that grown married men wear. Teenage boys would not want to look like a dad.

How old is you DD not dad

Bless him op. You really are a lovely mum. Hopefully some new bits will help his confidence.

My brother lets me help with the dressing of him too I think loads of men are like this want to look good without having the effort of sorting it themselves!

He gets jeans from ASOS, T-shirt’s from ASOS and riverisland - says topman are “slim fit” few jumpers/hoody’s and coats from primark - partly because he has a habit of leaving them behind somewhere.

Like a PP I think a nice watch and shoes have helped him. He has white vans and white Adidas trainers - most of the other fellas seem to be wearing similar!

Hope he gets sorted !

My ds is a little older but he now wears looser fitting jeans rolled up at the ankle.
On top he tends to wear a plain T-shirt with a shirt unbuttoned over the top.
He buys most of his clothes from Asos.

I think the thick plaid shirt , open over white T-shirt would be a good look for him.
My boys are 17 and 19, for going out they wear jeans and T-shirt/ polo/ rugby shirt styles.

How about helping him to shape up a bit? Gym membership for Christmas maybe?
If he has moobs then hes more than a bit chunky.

Your last post brought a lump to my throat OP.
I have a 17 year old lad who is very tall and quite muscly so not on the slim side.
He is quite fashion conscious and buys tops and jeans from Jack Wills and buys a lot from Urban outfitters.
He wears jeans that are slim leg - I think baggy jeans and tops will just emphasise rather than flatter to be honest.
It's great your Ds is starting to go out with his mates. My son had a very low confidence in the start of year 12 but thankfully he has now got a part time job, dropped A levels and taken up a BTEC which he loves and is starting to get a good social life, it's so lovely to see them coming out of themselves a bit!

He is a lazy bugger unfortunately; we have a small gym here at home and he has started going in there but we have to nag him to do it. I did think about a gym membership (there is one fairly local that's not too expensive so tends to be full of the younger generation) but I'm not sure he'll go alone.

He isn't massively overweight at all so I don't know why he has moobs; I've been told it could be hormonal. He doesn't do any high impact/raised heart rate exercise though which I'm sure would help him. But there is only so much I can do isn't there? He is an intelligent lad. He's got to want to make changes to his lifestyle.

DD is 14; she is very encouraging. She's written him a list and pinned it to his bedroom wall with gym sessions that he must complete for this week. He's up in the gym now but only because DD and I both reminded him then gently nagged him and then finally pretty much pushed him

Hi OP.

DS is a couple of years younger but very much into the sort of look that Bernadette posted.

Aka nice slim jeans, tee-shirt (long sleeved in this weather) plus checked/patterned shirt or hoodie with a jacket over the top (for this you need thinner hoodies).

The whole layered look seems to be what he and all his friends are embracing and I think it would work really well for your DS if he's not confident in his body shape - in that he might not wear a white tee shirt alone but would look great/feel great in one with a flannel checked/patterned shirt over it and a nice jacket.

As a pp said good shoes/boots can really lift a mans outfit. DS lives for his blue Dr Martens, pricy yes but very durable/practical and personally I think better if you go for a more unusual colour rather than the standard black or reddy brown. In summer he lives in his converse high tops. Jeans (very straight or skinny) seem to be worn slightly short (or rolled) to show off more of the boot. Don't be tempted by baggy jeans if you are doing the layer look as it can just look bulky, whereas tighter slim jeans contrast with the "bulk" of the layers in a way that's flattering.

We buy most of his clothes from ASOS, Gap, John Lewis (he really likes the penguin brand), Next and even M&S has some nice men's stuff re: the basics like plain tee shirts which are great for the layering look and jeans.

If he has a bit of a belly, try tshirts from tall ranges. It's been a game changer for DH. They are so much more flattering on him.