Wedding Deep South USA

[kaytee87]

What kind of dress would you wear to a wedding in the Deep South. It's a big wedding in a lovely converted barn type thing.

There's only one. Surely....

(Sorry. I couldn't resist!!)

No need to overthink it - I went to a few weddings in Virginia, North Carolina and South Carolina in the late 80s/early 90s, and honestly, other than the time I was a bridesmaid I’m pretty sure that whatever I wore I bought in Macys or Lord & Taylor in New Jersey and did not feel out of place in the slightest. If you’re a Brit you’ll be the most popular person there anyway and people will queue just to hear your accent so what you wear will not matter at all.

The one thing I would make sure you do is dress in a way that keeps you cool if it’s in the summer - the heat and humidity can be so oppressive!

Have a look at this web page from Southern Living magazine and see if photos of the guests in these weddings give you any ideas:

www.southernliving.com/general/southern-wedding-planner

Y’all have fun now, y’hear?!

I can't speak for the Deep South but I went to a friend's wedding in New York and decided I'd go all out and do the full English wedding look (it was a big church wedding in Brooklyn). Pastels, huge hat, you know the score.

mommybunny is totally right. I was the only Brit there and everyone was desperate to talk to me. I'm pretty sure that by the end of the reception every single guest (plus bride and groom) had had a turn wearing my hat. They all loved it. Definitely a great icebreaker. They thought I looked like the Queen. The bride and groom still talk about my hat years later!! The only downside is that it was a bitch taking a huge hat on the plane. But worth it in the end.

We're Scottish, DH will likely wear a kilt. The wedding is in October. We tend to really dress up for weddings and I don't want to look out of place. It's a afternoon wedding in a barn which looks amazing!
I was thinking the attached for ds who will have just turned 3?
Will keep looking for myself nearer the time (incase I'm pregnant by then too as we're ttc)

Thanks for the link at @mommybunny

I went to one. Just wear what you would over here, but don’t wear a hat or fascinator. Heels were annoying as a lot of hanging about on lawns.

Yes, make sure you will be cool enough. I took a water bottle with me, and loads of locals had hand fans (the paper kind). I was also quite surprised how casually a lot of men were dressed, lots of polo shirts and chinos.

Not much alcohol around. Lots of iced tea! Dancing was done by 10.30pm! Lots of people left straight after the food. I don’t know if that was normal, or just how this couple wanted it.

It was a really lovely experience, and everyone was SO friendly and kind. I was on my own a lot as with someone in the wedding party, and was welcomed into a random family for the eating bit

So I'm thinking the shorter dress if I'm not pregnant (or not showing) with yellow comfortable heels - already have this outfit.

The maxi dress with flat sandals if I'm pregnant enough to be showing. I actually wish I could find this dress in non maternity as I love the colour.

Do people not tend to wear anything in their hair at weddings there then? It will feel odd not to have a hat or fascinator on

Definitely take a hat! You need something to compete with DH kilt! Also I feel like your missing an opportunity for DS to look adorable in a kilt...( though my 3 yr old only submitted to it for a couple of hrs so back up Chinos required) pair with a polo shirt... your DH is going to swelter in full regalia isn’t he??

Have you been to the area? If so then took be more prepared. October can still be oppressively hot if your down near the coast, so consider your fabric and make up wisely. Your hair will be different in such a different climate. Locals will be more used to it an nd perhaps not sweating as much!

Your dress are pretty but i think the long one may prevent any chance of relief from a light breeze.

Outfit for DS is spot on but if his dad is in a kilt and you either have one for DS or can get one cheaply it would charm everyone beyond your imagination! (So only do it if you know your DS won’t be uncomfortable being the centre of attention!).

Depending on how “Deep” South the wedding is, by October the kilt regalia probably won’t be too uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t advise it in the height of summer, especially as a barn won’t be air-conditioned.

Hats are much more common in Southern weddings than Northern, so I don’t think you can go wrong wearing one. When I got married (in England) my Southern relatives who came were much more into the hats than the Northern ones. But never after dark! I went to university in Virginia in the late 80s and I will never forget seeing a group of dressed up girls going out one evening for sorority rush and one of them wearing a hat. A good friend of mine, who had been raised in Columbia SC, sniffed “well she just sealed her fate”. I’m just a dumb broad from New Jersey and I hadn’t known that. My Brooklyn-born mother would have, but she never passed that knowledge on to me.

At last a question I can answer! It's not the heat so much as the humidity!
Knee-length or tea-length in a fabric that doesn't wilt or wrinkle (not cotton or linen) a polyester blend that is permanent press.
Bright florals are nice and solids are fine except no solid white, black or red.
If it lasts into the evening bring a light wrap and have some mosquito repellent spray in your purse. Mosquitoes are the curse of the south.

I went to an outdoor wedding in Georgia and it was very casual. There were people in shorts and t-shirts! Other than the wedding party I was probably the most 'glamourously' dressed there. Hat to shade your face is fine but I don't think they wear fancy hats to show off like we do.
Guests tucked into the buffet when they fancied and there was no alcohol at all because the family are churchgoers. I swear we were done by 8 and headed home for dinner.

My friends son recently got married in the USA to an American, and again, the photos looked pretty casual.

The second dress looks like a granny's dressing gown. The first one is lovely.

I don't think DS would like to be centre of attention, he's a bit wary of strangers still but that might change over the next few months.

DH was thinking about a lightweight kilt and probably not wearing the full shabang. Either that or a trews outfit.

I think the average is 25 Celsius in October and we've been informed that the worst of the humidity will be over - hopefully!

Maybe I will get a hat then... any suggestions on style?

@GeorgiaGirl52 good tip about the insect repellent, thanks.

I've never been to the area before but have been to Florida twice in August (Orlando and Miami). It was very humid at that time of year!

Oh god not trews! Kilt or standard wedding wear.

gallicgirl you may be right that the dress is more casual than you’d expect here. It’s been a while since I’ve been to a wedding in the US —and standards have slipped dreadfully harrumph— but there may in fact be a dress code on the invitation which can provide some guidance.

@MorrisZapp he actually looks amazing in trews. I think he's young and fashionable (and slim) enough to pull them off. I do think a kilt would be more popular though.
The groom is Scottish so we'll find out what he's going for.

@FrancisCrawford sounds nice. I've met the bride and she didn't come across at that conservative but her family may be. A floral tea dress is always nice anywhere I think.
I have quite bad scars on my left leg from surgeries so I do like maxi dresses but maybe I can cover them with make up to wear my blue and yellow dress.

I think the fact the groom is Scottish himself, and presumably will have a contingent of compatriot family and friends, will raise the “tone” of dress generally (and I’m American so I can say that) so I don’t think you need to worry too much about being overdressed. If anyone needs to worry about being overdressed it is the men, not the women. Women who wear a dress and make some sort of effort will almost always fit in, whereas if most of the men are in shorts and t-shirts and your DH shows up in trews it might be uncomfortable.

Agree though that black would look a little out of place - for an evening do at a swanky Fifth Avenue hotel it would be fine and almost expected, but it would be strange at an afternoon barn anywhere in the country, not just the South.

If any of the guys are single and wearing kilts to an American wedding, make sure they're kitted out with condoms in their sporran and their hotel address written somewhere in ink :)

They will be devoured by Americans. Gay, straight, wedding guest, barman.

Devoured and deflowered. It is on.

MorrisZapp damn straight