Please help me stop being so frumpy!

[TeaByTheSeaside]

I'm 50 next year. I don't have a clue what suits me and I go around looking a total frump.

I'm size 16-18 and 1 1/2 stone overweight (currently doing slimming World so that will hopefully change) .

I'm an apple shape so big up top with a big tummy.

Can you offer me any advice at all?

I'll post some pictures of how I go around looking.

You've had lots of input already. I agree with other pp drop all the patterns and go for some more fitted/tailored clothes in mixture of navy/grey/black/cream. Having less of a contrast of colours between top and bottom half unifies the look. Think simple and classy. You have a good figure and your hair is nice. Shouldn't take much to update your look. Oh and a nice classic handbag maybe brown or beige statement piece.

Hello!

I stand by what I said about the OP because I do think she's very hard on herself, but I do agree with the general advice about avoiding cardigans. I used to buy them with the aim of looking like the skinny women on Pinterest who always look so cosy and bohemian in theirs, but on actual human women they do tend to add bulk where bulk ain't needed.

I'm ten years younger than you but feel really frumpy too so I'm by no means an expert but I did feel your bag, scarf and fleece stood out as being particular no no's.

I wouldn't wear scarves unless you are trying to specifically keep your neck warm! The bag could be more structured, a shorter strap would make it look less droopy and fleeces aren't flattering on many people.

Like I said I'm clearly no expert though!!!

I like the bird top

And your style in the last pic (apart from the shoes )

I am late 40s and wear lots of dresses, as they are comfy yet also easier to "put together" than separates.

I find neckline matters, so deep V, deep scoop neck, or crisp shirt collar or high neck

But never crew neck or small V or similar

If you really like bags with a longer strap then try the Joules Darby bag as it's structured, comes in lots of colours and fits enough in!

I don’t like “tops” and cardigans. I would try on some dresses, especially jersey wrap dresses. I bet you have a lovely face and your hair is good. I would have a manicure and a pedicure every month. I prefer coats and jackets, or even those thin goose down gillets from uniglo, to cardigans. I dislike floral patterns and random Cath Kidson type fabrics. Block colours are much better.

I am no way a style icon but definitely ditch the bag. Perhaps a smaller one like this sort of shape www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-rhea-leather-camera-bag/p3539118 - I think the heavier looking bags can make you look like you are being sliced diagonally.
I try and avoid cardigans and unstructured tops together as they can also look a bit unflattering. I’m quite scruffy looking naturally with annoying hair. I could get away with that look when I was younger (and thinner) but I have to be more careful now although some days I just don’t care.

I'm no stylists but I just wanted to say I think you look nice already! Sure, you can have fun and be more on trend, but from your thread title I was expecting much more frumpiness.

Definitely more fitted trousers and a more supportive bra would make an instant difference.

I’m the same size as you OP and I find the Boden Richmond 7/8 trousers in a plain colour really good. I’ve been buying them for a couple of years now, so have a good selection of plain colours which I find can be dressed up or down - for example I’ve got a blue pair which with a nice top and heels is great for going out, but the same pair with a tee shirt and flat pumps ( I wear Fitflop sport flat trainers) I are casual enough for a day out.
I’ve also paid for the Next £20 year delivery option so I order a load of things just to try on - stuff I would never normally try on in a shop, but find at home, by myself, I’ll give it a bash! I agree with other posters, to a certain extent about buying better quality clothes, but only basic classic clothes as you can sometimes find you’ve got really expensive clothes in your wardrobe which are dated - shoulders, length or detailing are just not current. I try to buy medium range clothing and update them with a few current accessories.

Thank you so much for all your help. Some brilliant tips.

I tend to dress for comfort (hence the dodgy bra and loose jeans). I also feel fat so try and hide my figure.

But you're right - the loose fitting stuff isn't doing me any favours at all.

I'm going to get a capsule wardrobe as suggested and hopefully I'll start looking and feeling much better!

Just one question

A lot of you have suggested tops with horizontal stripes.

I thought this was a no no if you're large up top? Am I wrong there?

I don’t think that horizontal stripes make you look bigger, but think they look flattering on everyone. They look best if worn on a fitted (but not tight) top, with a thin blazer or jacket layered over.

I find a slash/boat neck stripey top the most flattering for my busty short torso.

Oddly primark has had the best ones for me so maybe worth a look if you're not convinced as it's not a huge outlay.

Don’t overthink it. A good Breton suits everyone and it’s likely you’ll cover it with one of the good jackets suggested most of the time going into autumn. Joules do good ones in a heavier jersey that doesn’t cling.

Wide, vertical stripes are a great way to look enormous. Fine horizontal stripes are surprisingly flattering. Breton tops are popular for a reason!

You need clothes that fit. A bit of weight loss will work wonders too but you look frumpy because none of your clothes fit you properly- they are too loose. If you drop to a size 12 and buy fitted clothes you will be transformed:)

It all looks droopy. Your handbag is old fashioned , too big, dominates and not in a good way. Tan is fine if it's neat and stylish but also think about a colour to go with your outfits. And neater- you aren't carrying the kitchen sink in there! Cross body is fine if it's smaller.

If you wear cardis, fasten them and buy ones that fit your body. Fastening just the centre button(s) will create a waist.

Buy jeans or trousers that are slimmer legged. Smarten up your accessories (bag, maybe a necklace or nice scarf) , neat shoes.

The White Stuff patterns are very ageing imo.

Go for smaller prints- like ditsy prints- or plain colours.

I don't agree about horizontal stripes BUT a Breton may work.

Mawkish, yes I have given up on cardis too...

Thank you for the advice.

I don't think cardis are a no-no. They can look stylish if they FIT! Boden do the 'everyday' cardigan which is cotton and lycra. I have several in an 8 or a 10 and they are figure hugging. I wear over a T which fits and do the buttons up except the top and bottom ones. You need to look for a semi-fitted cardigan. example www.boden.co.uk/en-gb/womens-knitwear/cardigans/k0103-blu/womens-cyan-amelia-crew-cardigan

I'm not a fan of the colours to be honest

Ditch the cardigans and patterned clothes

Increase the amount of clothes you have in black and white. For example oversized white shirts and black leggings.

If you want colours then go for block colours with clean, straight lines.

Don't go for leggings! But I agree that black and white would look better than all those colours, and I agree that you need some narrower jeans. If you don't fancy skinny, maybe try some straight ones - skinny are perhaps starting to look a bit tired anyway.

I agree about block colours.
Pick 2-3 neutrals and a couple of contrast colours and start replacing clothes slowly within this new colour palette.

You're a very attractive woman. You said that you're size 16/18. You look smaller than that to me. Maybe the problem is you're buying size 18 clothes when you're more like 14/16? A good supportive bra can work wonders. I was wearing the wrong sort of bras for years. I went along to m&s to get measured and started wearing balconette styles, I looked like I'd dropped a dress size instantly.
Don't be afraid to show your figure. You're covering yourself up with clothes that are a little too big and don't make the most of your assets.
Boden dresses are well made and very flattering. You can get some great bargains on ebay if you don't want to spend a fortune experimenting with your new look.
You're far too young to be feeling frumpy. You should be wearing clothes that make you feel good about yourself. I hope you have lots of fun trying styles

Lots of good advice here for you . I lost a lot of weight and had a bra fitting in. Rigby and Peller and it was worth every penny . I went from matronly to perky and looked a size smaller instantly. The other suggestion before spending a lot of money on a new wardrobe is to get your colours done . The difference wearing the right colours is amazing too .
Have fun with your re - vamp !