Help for a 45 year old who’s lost her way

[AvonCallingBarksdale]

Hi. I need some make-up and general “ grooming@ advice. I’m 45 and generally just put in clarins BB cream and Vaseline and face powder. I can’t use eyeshadow as it kicks off my eczema but mascara is ok. Problem is it all looks ok for a couple of hours then seems to just fall off. I live in jeans out of work - would quite like a cuffed trouser maybe for round the house . What happens in those makeovers in department stores - do you have to buy the entire contents of their range?? I get my hair coloured regularly but other than that I feel old frumpy and mumsy.

I’ve no advice but just wanted to say that at 43 I feel the same! I have the same make up routine I had 10 years ago.
There’s a lot to be said for being older and not caring what people think, being comfortable etc but I hate to look old and frumpy!
So I’m watching this thread with interest......

True and I don’t care what people think but I just feel like I look bleurgh . I don’t know how to use primer/bronzer/blusher or really what they’re meant for. I wear lipstick and reapply but never quite look right imho. The thought of having a makeover in MAC or Benefit which is my DDs idea of heaven is frankly terrifying

I got my eyebrows done first then I booked an appointment with Clinique recently in Boots. I explained in detail what I wanted and they got to work. I bought the basic face: lovely foundation that I get complimented on, powder, blusher, lipgloss, eyebrow pencil (miracle device) and mascara.

I also bought Liz Earle face wash (lazy, can do in the shower)with the Muslin cloths and Clinuque moisturiser.

MASSIVE difference.

Also have a pro facial once every 6 weeks.

I find Mac too OTT and garish at the counter, and Benefit is too much faffing. The Bobby counter is VG also IMO.

Once you get the basics right it's a lot easier. Plus at Boots you get the kick back on your points card.

Thanks TSSDNCOP I have a Boots card. I do have super sensitive skin but have used clarins and Clinique in the past - I need a proper lesson!! What’s a pro facial?

I take myself to a beautician and have a good hour of scrub, mask and moisturise. People buy me vouchers for occasions, which makes it an even lovelier treat.

I'm a similar age, and I never felt like my make up made me look particularly great nor did it stay very long. My worst area was the bags and really dark circles under my eyes. Recently I went to the Estée Lauder counter in House of Fraser at Meadowhall, told the woman I was looking for a new foundation. She was really good, I didn't feel patronised, she took all my existing makeup off, although it didn't really look like I was wearing any. She put primer, concealer, foundation, bronzer and blusher on..

She matched the foundation to my skin tone after trying 4 or 5. Used a double ended concealer which has a highlighter at one end. I've never before used bronzer or blusher because I have really pale skin and didn't want to look fake but she made me look amazing. The double wear foundation is amazing, it stays all day and never rubs off on clothes.

I bought all of the products she used but she put no pressure on me to do so. It's the best £150 I think I've ever spent. I wear the make up every day, and I look so much healthier. The highlighter even appears to be working to reduce the dark circles under my eyes as even without the make up on, the dark circles are almost gone. I can't recommend Estée Lauder highly enough. As I'd spent quite a bit she also gave me a free gift which was a good sized make up bag with a load of samples which were actually a decent size including eye make up remover, their night repair serum and eye serum, mascara, eye shadows and a moisturiser. I'm a total covert and won't ever change.

Hello, I'm same age and feel pretty confident in my appearance. I've got a natural look, but it takes a bit of work.

A couple of times a year I go to a beauty counter. I love spacenk and Bobbi Brown. My trick is to go first thing in the morning when they are quiet, wonder round, and ask a member of staff whose look I like.

I often try to sort one thing at a time, and I'll often ask 'is it possible to try eg some foundation and then go away and see how it sits'. They always say yes and it then takes all the pressure off to buy, although I do buy on the spot if I immediately love something.

Katy

Thanks all. I need to get over feeling embarrassed that I don’t “know” how to use makeup and pitch up at Boots/HOF. I have an image in my mind of what I could look like, face and clothes wise, but I just don’t seem to get there quite yet.

Yeah I got to this stage and like a PP I went to Estee Lauder, the one in House of Fraser, Oxford Street.

I now look so much better, more polished and "done" and my make up stays on all day. The double wear foundation seems pricey but you use such a tiny amount as the coverage is amazing.

I'd recommend John Lewis rather than HoF for getting a makeup session. The staff are usually a bit less full-on even if the same brand. Bobbi Brown or Clinique would be better than Mac or Benefit for a more low key look.
Also recommend Sali Hughes' book Pretty Honest for an overview of skincare, makeup etc.

Another vote for Double Wear - it's brilliant. They will give you a decent sized tester, if you want to try it for a few days first.

I think a visit to the Estée Lauder counter is a great idea. I’ve recently started using their B&B cream and a fabulous lipstick and I feel much better about myself- at 50!

Definitely having the eyebrows shaped or threaded! A good haircut. And I love No. 7 skin illuminator mixed with my foundation.

I second Liz Earle face products, especially for those with very sensitive skin - I use the moisturiser and exfoliator. I know what you mean about not being confident with how to use makeup properly! I’ve booked a makeup lesson with the lovely lady who did my wedding makeup. Happy to PM her details if anyone’s interested. She lives in Chelmsford, Essex, but it would be worth enquiring to see if she would be willing to travel.

This is great thank you. So lots of Estée Lauder recs and Liz Earle too. I’ve got a good haircut at the moment and my eyebrows are pretty much ok (through no planning on my part)

I'll add a vote for the Estée Lauder counter too, and especially for Double Wear! Go and have lots of fun playing and experimenting, it doesn't have to be too serious or scary.

I would go to a Bobby Brown counter. Their makeup is lovely, and you will look like you but a littler more polished.

If you are near a space nk try there too, they have lovely brands and can refresh your make up easily. However JL/HOF quite often have offers on with freebies which is a bonus!

I swear by Liz Earle if the skin isn't right the make up never will be it seems expensive but you need so little of it it lasts ages.

Have you looked into you tube tutorials or instagram? Lots of people there who do everything from basics to full on drag queen face.

Another vote for Bobbi Brown. I'm the same age as you and it just works- none of it slides down your face during the day. Book one of their 'lessons' and that way you won't have to worry about blundering up to the counter and not knowing where to start. I'm sure they do a natural look/daytime lesson you can start with.

Another massive shout out for Bobbi Brown. I’m 46, tried Clinique in my 20’s, Liz Earle, Clarins, Chanel, Lancôme, Mac in my 30’s/early 40’s & discovered BB about 5 mths ago! The first product I tried was the Vitamin Enriched Face base which is absolutely amazing. Since then I’ve fallen in love with the foundation stick (applied with their round brush which is a must), Tinted moisturiser is also lovely. Illuminating powder, Corrector, concealer, Smoky eyes mascara (much better than hypnose & they’re real, IMO). Their pot rouges are wonderful & double up as a lip colour. I especially love pale pink & pretty powerful. Highly recommend going to a B.B. counter for a consultation (I find John Lewis stores better). Also look up Hannah Martin on Instagram or have a look at some of her videos on YouTube. I have to say, I am totally hooked & doubt I’ll now choose any other brand. Have fun 😀

Wow, thank you all so much . I will come back and update . Helpful, lovely MNers.

Same age here and I have just started trying to make myself more presentable, I have had my eyebrows micro bladed but that was because one has virtually fallen out completely, but they are quite natural looking and help me with the keeping them in a decent shape, but I use mainly Clinique stuff as I can be sensitive (Clarins is a huge no no for me)

I use either the BB cream or their More than powder foundation as both quite light as sometimes I need a little dusting of translucent. powder to combat the shiny forehead, but I use their bronzer too, a swoosh across cheeks and swish across forehead, down tase and a dab on the chin works wonders and it light enough to hide bad technique but give enough colour to stop me looking dead and then I curl my eyelashes which seems to make a huge difference and I use Eyeko mascara which has caffeine in it which has made my eyelashes look really good and full, and then I like to use either a moisturising chubby stick on my lip in a pinky colour I think it's cherry something or other or I use the lip stuff that comes in the Black Honey colour but I will alway blot that one and it gives me the perfect pink lip.

Oh forgot to say I sometimes use Benefit dandelion instead of the bronzer but it's less forgiving of being heavy handed.