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Original poster

Letting the grey hairs win

34 replies

TheWeatherGirl1 · 20/03/2018 19:35

I've been going grey for years and years and I give up.
Hands up, grey hairs. You win.

So I've been dying it brown for years, I'm 43. It's now a shoulder length darkish brown with maybe 60-70percent grey roots.

I'd like to go grey gracefully. How?
I took a picture to the hairdressers today of a model with excellent grey hair and they sucked their teeth and shook their heads and suggested highlights.
I've never had such a thing and I can't picture it.
Is this my way forward?
I'd like to reach a point of low maintenance, excellent, chic grey hair in my future.
Any suggestions welcome.

OP posts:
Fekko · 20/03/2018 19:39

I'm hoping the buggers go away. I've never dyed my hair and don't intend to start!

I shall just self identify as a natural redhead.

MinnieMinchkin · 20/03/2018 20:26

Try one of the FB groups, like Gray and Proud, as you'll see lots of pictures and be able to see how other people have done it. Many have gone cold turkey and braved the skunk line, some have gone for the chop, some have used temporary colours to blend and some have used highlights, with mixed success.

I am the same age as you and have less grey than I thought; I'd been dying for years and probably didn't really need to. It's 11 months since I used a permanent dye and I have been using temp colour masks to cover the frazzled orange ends while allowing the grey in my roots to come through. I want to keep growing my hair, but would probably have another year to go if I was happy with the length I have now, which is just touching my shoulders.

goose1964 · 20/03/2018 20:55

I don't colour my hair, mainly because our shower is deceased, again. I have a nearly white streak at the hairline of my forehead, the rest is mainly my natural colour, mouse.

StillMedusa · 20/03/2018 21:28

I just braved it and grew mine out. Had a short cut after a year and am now growing it again. I couldn't see myself with highlights (they always go brassy) and tbh after the first 4 months I was just used to it.

Mine is salt and pepper and while I don't love it, it is so healthy, I'm never going back I don't think!

'Going gorgeously Grey' on FB is a great source of support and inspiration :)

Teaonthelawn · 20/03/2018 21:32

I had highlights for a number of years to blend in the gray. This is quite low maintenance because you don't notice the regrowth as easily as with an 'all over' colour - I had 2/3 different shades. Then I hurt my back quite badly and didn't go to the hairdressers for 9 months - when I did go back the gray had taken over and I just decided to have it cut. I found going gray to be a bit of a shock to the system. You need a good cut and lipstick - otherwise you feel old and washed out. I have gone from never wearing lipstick to wearing it every day.

Original poster
TheWeatherGirl1 · 20/03/2018 22:14

Yeah, I was aware of the need for a full face of makeup before putting the bins out.

I can't grow it out, I really hate myself with the wiry grey roots.
I look like a pained witch.

OP posts:
Original poster
TheWeatherGirl1 · 20/03/2018 22:15

Thanks for the FB groups, I will check them out.

OP posts:
BagelGoesWalking · 20/03/2018 22:32

There was a really good thread about going grey, different haircuts, how to make the transition etc. Can't remember the thread name but I'm sure you'll find it with an appropriate search.

DianaT1969 · 20/03/2018 22:41

I'm in the same boat. Can't keep up with the roots and expensive appointments every month. Last ditch tomorrow to see if I can live with the grey coverage of lush brun. Have to use henna red first for the brown to stick apparently. Will look like Ronald McDonald for 3 days while the red deepens/oxidises. Then brown. Hopefully much better condition and less of a distinct regrowth line. Much cheaper too. Will persevere and see how that goes for a year. If not, grey it is.

swearymad · 20/03/2018 22:51

Check out Grombre on Instagram too. I'm growing my colour out and I look there for inspiration when I'm wavering.

UnnecessaryFennel · 21/03/2018 08:30

I just came on to say check out #grombre on instagram. It really is lovely.

I went for the chop. I'm 44 and was getting to the point where I was losing the battle against the grey. In the end I just thought, sod it. This is the colour of my hair, I'm going to go with it.

The big thing for me was finding a hairdresser who was supportive, though. Particularly if you've been paying out huge amounts for colouring etc, they're not often very happy to lose that income stream! My hairdresser is absolutely fab and told me the other day she loves cutting my hair because she gets bored of doing blond highlighted bobs all day Grin

I have found I've needed to wear more make-up, though, and the cut has to be good to avoid looking frumpy.

I wobble occasionally, particularly if I've been ill or am tired, and think god, I'm too young for this. But most of the time I love it, and get loads of compliments. Go for it!

Kotare · 21/03/2018 09:36

I grey mine out and I'm much less grey than I expected. I was dying darker and it just made the greys stand out. My hair is so healthy and it has a lot of tone and natural variation. It feels good to be the real me again. If anyone doesn't like it they can feck off.

I agree about the need for a supportive hairdresser. I was persuaded to have the colour stripped from my hair which ruined the condition and was a huge mistake.

EraArils · 21/03/2018 14:54

This is a really helpful thread that was on the go for a while Head shave to go grey. Lots of pictures on the thread of others who embraced the grey.

I had to do something drastic with my hair as I developed a lovely allergy to hair dye, so I buzzed it all off. It's nearly 7 months since I buzzed it and it is now 1001 different shades of grey/white, I love it.

BagelGoesWalking · 21/03/2018 14:56

Era that's the thread I was trying to remember! So glad you posted, it was bugging me Smile

mijotefixi · 21/03/2018 15:17

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EraArils · 21/03/2018 15:23

Bagel it is a brilliant thread. I have many pictures of my own hair transition on it.

Astrabees · 21/03/2018 15:39

I had to cancel my colour appointment nearly 3 weeks ago because of the snow, it will now be this Saturday. The little grey bits have become quite pronounced this week and when I push my fringe back and expose the grey hairs there it really ages me. I usually have myriads of highlights and lowlights in 3 shades that are very close to natural mouse. I might review the situation when I'm a few years older but just for now (I'm 61) I will be carrying on with the colour.

BagelGoesWalking · 21/03/2018 18:11

Era it must be quite long now (your last oic on that thread was Dec, I think).

You were brave to buzz cut it though. I wish I suited a shorter style. I had it very short for a few years when I was 20ish but it didn't really suit me and I'm sure it would suit me much less now! I'm not actually bothered about grey, I've got about 10% sprinkles through and the rest is dark brown naturally.

When the times comes, I'd love to be able to rock some gorgeous, grey quiffed style though Grin instead it will be some boring bon type thing as my hair is dead straight.

SpringNowPlease2018 · 21/03/2018 18:13

if you can't grow it out then one option is to keep putting a semi on it and then it will be more gradual....

don't see a hairdresser, I think they are terrified of women deciding to just go grey.

EraArils · 21/03/2018 19:06

Bagel My hair is now long enough for these haircuts now but I'm playing with growing it longer still. It's been nearly 7 months since my last buzz cut. I have trimmed the back of my hair throughout that time though, no one needs a mullet.

Letting the grey hairs win
Letting the grey hairs win
mixture · 21/03/2018 19:12

Dye it lighter and lighter. It'll take 2 years but you don't have to go around with grey roots. I dyed it myself - in the end just 5 minutes instead of the 30 it said on the package, and if I started with dark brown I ended with light brown almost blonde.

SauvignonBlanche · 21/03/2018 19:12

I've got one box of permanent dye left and I'm determined it shall be my last.

I know it takes 18 months for my hair to grow from scalp to the end of my bob and I'm not going ti have a badger stripe for that long so will move to semi-permanent dyes.

OCSockOrphanage · 21/03/2018 20:43

Era, if pic1 is you, then it suits you! It takes time to adjust your eye to ageing. The answer, I think for me is that I have had to rethink my whole style to look okay at 62. I don't believe I have to look drab because I am 62, and I am no less interested in S&B than I was at 22, but now I want to look seriously sophisticated and full of attitude instead of gorgeous.

Original poster
TheWeatherGirl1 · 21/03/2018 20:44

Ladies
Thank you so much for your responses and advice, it's all been most inspiring.

I'm going to keep wearing it up and keep slapping more and more make up on until it distracts from the greys, until I've figured out what to do.

I've had really short hair before, and it did suit, but that was when I had cheekbones and just the one chin.

I'll search for the recommended thread.
Thanks again

OP posts:
StickyHandPrintsOnMyFace · 21/03/2018 20:55

Don't rule out highlights... I'm using balayage to disguise the grey growth. My hairdresser is using a clear highlight, that just lifts a shade or two and gives me a sunkissed glow. Because it's delicately handpainted in, the greys just disappear into the mix. My long-term goal is to see what my grey looks like (I'm auburn naturally, so I fear it's never going to look as good as the grey inspo pics because RED).