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Is dressing in a super feminine way middle aged?

57 replies

GreyOwls · 24/10/2017 16:26

I've just been on another thread and someone posted something really interesting.

They said that dressing in a super feminine way is very middle aged, unless that is you manage to do it in a fresh way.

Is this true?

I'm not super feminine as I'm more natural / athletic in appearance and wear jeans and trainers generally (but can glam up at night when necessary) but am interested in how others see women who dress in a super feminine way. When I hear someone say 'dressed in a feminine way' I think of someone like Michelle Moane, as opposed to say, Pink or Victoria Beckham.

OP posts:
Doobigetta · 24/10/2017 16:35

I had to do an image search on Michelle Mone, as I couldn't really think how she usually dresses. It would appear that "sup34-feminine" means "acres of cleavage on display", and if so, yes, I think that's quite dated, and something you generally only see on older women. I don't think that's even a new thing. To generalise wildly, "fashion" has always been more about dressing to impress other women, and looking overtly sexy isn't always the same as fashion.

TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 24/10/2017 16:46

See, I wouldn't define michelle mone as looking 'super feminine'. I always think she looks cheap.

I think if you did super-feminine a' la Jennifer Aniston- who always looks polished but less muttony. Then you'd be fine. It's all in the tailoring I think.

twattymctwatterson · 24/10/2017 17:04

I don't think of Michelle Moane as being super feminine. I think of super feminine as floaty floral dresses and so on. Michelle Moane seems to wear a lot of clingy and revealing clothes. Her style is a bit Bette Lynch tbh

Therealslimshady1 · 24/10/2017 17:05

Oh, interesting topic!

Have been wondering about this recently, being middle aged and like to dress femininely (whatever that means Grin).

I like wearing dresses, esp fit and flare as flattering. But I now feel that I could not possibly wear, say, a fitted dress with court/heeled/dainty shoes. As that would look very ageing.

The dress now has to be a loser fit, and the shoes need to be chunky (trainers, biker boots, ankle boots, Ash shoes or Birkenstock or similar)

Basically, wearing a fitted dress with a,bit of cleavage and pointy or high heeled shoes are as dated as 1980s blue eye shadow and perms!

I am not into fashion really, and live in the sticks (but like clothes) and am interested in fashion and how it filters into the brain!

Ttbb · 24/10/2017 17:09

I always thought that super feminine clothing (light floaty fabrics with lots of ruffles, lace and floral prints) was the preserve of under 23s

TisapityshesaGeordie · 24/10/2017 17:11

I've found it prudent to avoid florals as I've gotten older.

AuntieStella · 24/10/2017 17:13

That has to take the biscuit as the worst ageist stereotype I've seen for quite some time.

And that's without going in to definitions of femininity!

warningcurvesahead.com/2016/06/04/24-things-women-over-30-should-wear/

Hellywelly10 · 24/10/2017 17:21

I do think it's old lady ish. Modern dressing is very simple. I'm 41 I don't plan to we

PollyPerky · 24/10/2017 17:29

I think you need to define 'super feminine ' first.

Examples?

CountFosco · 24/10/2017 18:27

Michelle Moane made her fortune selling bras so it makes business sense to dress to emphasis them. In addition, she has an hourglass figure which means people are more likely to perceive the way she dresses as sexual, there's a thread about the negative impact of being an hourglass on here at the moment which might be interesting and relevant.

I think as we get older the narrative is to move away from fast fashion to wearing 'flattering' clothes. Usually flattering seems to mean 'show off your body' so there might be a factor there as well. Whereas if you don't dress to flatter you are more likely to wear casual and comfortable clothing that fits with the modern dress down aesthetic.

AnyFucker · 24/10/2017 18:31

I think of "super feminine" now as the hyper sexualised way that blokes in frocks dress

MaryLennoxsScowl · 24/10/2017 18:32

I would have thought super feminine meant 50s circle dresses and florals and dainty heels. Which isn't dated because older women wear it, it's dated because it's boring.

Wh1stles · 24/10/2017 19:12

I don't think so. I think any age of person can have a style.

I think of feminine as the opposite of sexual. Pink v-necks. Pearl earrings.

Dustbunny1900 · 24/10/2017 19:23

When you say feminine, I'm guessing you mean sexual/bombshell/womanly/femme fatale ?

That doesn't read as especially middle-aged to me. I mean compared to what? Ingenue floral she and lace? Sporty athleisure that every 20 something wears ad nauseum?
Im not following either

Dustbunny1900 · 24/10/2017 19:24

*delicate not "she and". I have no idea

CotswoldStrife · 24/10/2017 19:33

Interesting to see the different interpretations of a dress style named 'feminine' here! To me, it would be more of the ruffles and lace style.

JanetStWalker · 24/10/2017 19:41

Holly Willoughby springs to mind.

Volontaire · 24/10/2017 19:59

I think you do reach an age where acres of cleavage does you no favours at all. I know that’s ageist but what looks good at 30 doesn’t look quite the same at 50. Sorry.

silkpyjamasallday · 24/10/2017 20:07

I wouldn't describe that Mone woman as dressing in a feminine way, she dresses in a way to emphasis physical markers of her femininity. Same with Victoria Beckham who used to dress in this same way during the height of her WAG days, but since she has been in the fashion industry she tends to wear loose flowing trousers, oversized shirts and I don't think that is feminine. Pink same story, she dresses sexily not necessarily feminine and a lot of her appeal to me as a child was the fact she wasn't particularly feminine she wore combat boots, ripped tshirts and had short hair. Feminine to me would be more like the Duchess of Cambridge, or Robin Wright in house of cards, or Blake Lively. Jeans can be feminine if paired with a blouse and certain shoes, or they can be androgynous. A skirt doesn't even have to be particularly feminine. It depends on how you put an outfit together whether it appears feminine or not. But I don't think it is femininity that looks 'middle aged', and I don't think describing it as middle aged is correct, it is a case of adding 'fresh' elements and keeping up with the times.

What looks middle aged in an outfit is subtle details, I think women who look middle aged in their dress sense, or more succinctly, frumpy, are the ones who are still wearing the cut of jean or toe shape on a boot that they wore when they are younger - these details change year on year and if people stick with what they wore 10 or 20 years ago it looks frumpy because it is dated. It would look middle aged/frumpy on a woman in her 20s in the same way it would on someone who was actually middle aged. A 45 year old isn't likely to chose the same boots or skirt as her teenage niece, it's the specific things that they buy and how they wear them that looks dated, and that could be in something masculine,androgynous or feminine. The fashion industry is fuelled by consumerism and making people desire the new constantly, people who stick with a style that has dated will look middle aged no matter what that style is or what period it comes from.

jeaux90 · 24/10/2017 21:06

Auntiestella fab post Grin

Feminine schmeminine

jeaux90 · 24/10/2017 21:07

AF Grin

GreyOwls · 24/10/2017 21:11

Interesting range of responses.

I cant imagine there being any negatives to having an hourglass figure! Thread link?

I agree we need to define super feminine dressing before saying wether or not its old fashioned.

I think of super feminine as both girlish (floral/lacy) and womanly (tight dress/high heels) and I suppose the TOWIE women would be womanly and the MIC women would be girlish. Is that a good analogy? I think both look nice but the MIC esthetique is more to my taste.

OP posts:
GreyOwls · 24/10/2017 21:18

Ah! I think silkpyjamasallday has it bang on.

Grin at *AnyFucker]

OP posts:
CountFosco · 24/10/2017 21:25

I cant imagine there being any negatives to having an hourglass figure! Thread link?

Hourglass issues, I'm an hourglass and although my waist is no longer as small as it once was I can recognise the difficulties in dressing to avoid looking sexy/cheap.

Dustbunny1900 · 24/10/2017 21:28

I know "kibbe" and his like are seen as old fashioned, but I think they had the right idea..it's all in following your own natural lines and a grey scale of yang (more masculine) to yin (feminine).
My friend has big round eyes, curls, soft curves, and 0 straight or angular lines so is best suited to more traditionally Lacey soft drapey clothes.. Whereas I'm very thin and angular and frilly romantic stuff just "clashes" with my body's natural lines

You're right that Girlish/ingenue is also a different category I think (demure lace, floaty fabric, bows, florals, etc)
Vs romantic which is a lush womanly curvy more sexy look. Both feminine, but both very different

I think that on someone who has those very yin feminine features, it will be flattering and certainly not aging.

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