Kind of bra intervention but dd's first bra.

[strongasmeringue]

She's done the measuring as per the usual recommendation. She's 27 below and 34 across. Can anyone tell me what that means in English please and recommend a good first bra? She's been wearing crop tops for a few years, said point blank no for a bra, but I feel she needs more support now and is ready to try a bra.

The only shops we can get to tomorrow which sells bras are Sainsbury's and marks and spencer.

She will not be fitted by a stranger and won't try on in the shop. She has physical difficulties so I won't be making her. I'll just go back and forth when necessary.

Thank you very much.

If she’s 27 round the ribs a 34 is too big.

There is, however, a difference between being comfortable and wearing a bra that fits - and very occasionally the two shall meet.

I have bras that are a 34F that I wear for slobbing about in because I can sit down without them digging into me. They don’t really do my boobs any favours though. Mostly they just flatten me. I was fitted in Bravissimo and came out with two 30G bras that are my “best” bras.

For a young girl it’s really important they fit and don’t just squash. Breast tissue needs room to grow.

Have you done boob or bust for yourself OP? If you are a 32/34, a 36 will be HUGE! If you put the 36 on with the cups at the back and pull the band away, how much gap is there?

I had similar, in that the correct back size felt awful and I felt comfier in one that was too big. I think it's from years of wearing a bra too lose, so one that fits feels too tight.

I had to experiment with the style of cups, once I'd found a cup that suited my shape, I was able to wear the tighter back size.

It may be worth trying to get a correct fitting bra for your DD from the beginning rather than getting her used to a bra that's too big on the back.

34 back, I called it!

Two things:

1. I feel sorry for your DD who is going to get a lot of back pain

1. Why post if you didn’t want truthful answers and advice?

A 34 on a size 8?!

Glad she's comfortable and everything but that's not a proper fit. I wear a 34/36 and I'm a size 16.

I can't get over M&S looking a a size 8 girl and suggesting 36

We tried on 30 and 32 and they were too tight.

I feel shit but thanks for all the help anyway.

The D and DD weren't flat against the chest.

She refused point blank to be fitted by the woman. I did my best and I am confident this fits her.

She won't have back pain. She already sees someone for spine issues she has treatment as soon as she needs it. I look after her really well. If she wears it and she says she doesn't think it's right then back we'll go. She'd had enough. I asked her to please try on one more. She did. And it fit.

Of course I wanted help. I asked for advice as I don't have a mum to help me. I'm learning all the time with my kids. I didn't like the rude comments. I remeasured after the website suggestion. I wouldn't buy her a bra I didn't think was right. With her physical issues it would be silly.

what size were the cups in the 30/32 as if the cups were too small then the bra would feel tight? No way is she a 36 back as I am a 36 back at size 20/22. I doubt she is a 34 either

For future knowledge - the cup is relevant to the back size so a 34E is not the same cupsize as a 30E for example.

The band should be snug and should not be able to be pinged any more than a couple of inches away from the body. And it is the band that does most of the work. Not the straps. If the straps keep falling down it is generally because the band is too big

One way to test the band is to put the bra on back to front so the cups do not interfere with the sizing, as they will steel from the band size if they are too small.

The bra may well leave marks where it has been when you take it off. This doesn't mean it's wrong, it means it in the same way as you might take off your socks and have a ring round your ankle where the elasticy bit is. It shouldn't dig in or be uncomfy to wear, if it is it could well be the wrong 'cut' - the bra interventioners on here (not me by a long shot) are very good at saying things like 'if it digs in under your arm this means x, try this brand as it's wider' etc.

[[http://thebetterbracampaign.blogspot.co.uk/p/fitting-advice.html
this site is very informative on what is what]]

It is a minefield of info and so much so, most people believe they are in the right size when infact they are not.

It deis seem very odd that the lady said a 34 and it seemed to fit when she measured a 27 but when I was putting them in for her I couldn't get the 30D iirc to fasten. I was surprised how wide her back was but she has a problem with her spine which may be relevant. When she had the 34E on she faced me and it looked perfect. I'm now thinking I should have checked the band at the back more. I will look at her tomorrow when she puts it on and if it's not right we'll go to John Lewis.

I asked her if it felt okay and she said she doesn't know how it should feel. She also has sensitivity issues so would tell me if it felt uncomfortable but it also means she won't cope with things that are too tight, which is what the 30/32 felt. I am open to her needing a different/smaller back size but wouldn't know what cup size to get.

She's very stubborn to add to her issues

I buy a 16 in tops and need a 36.

30D wouldn't fasten as the cup would be far too small. If the 34E fit ok then to get the same cup volume in a 30 cup she would need 30FF

Op I wore a 34b for years and always found the straps slipping off my shoulders and the back strap riding up. When I got measured according to the brilliant women on here (and backed up by John Lewis) I found I was a 32e. I thought I could never tolerate such a tight band but you know what? I don’t feel it, it never slips or rides up and it’s so comfy. Much much more so than a bigger band. Sometimes I can’t get my head round how something tighter is more comfy than something looser but it’s the truth

Sorry I meant I used to wear a 36b not 34 b

I've emailed bravissimo to ask for help.

If I was to take her to John Lewis what brands would be good. I'm assuming she'll refuse shop help again.

I'll make a list of sizes to try 30FF..

I'm also thinking of buying on line so can try on in the house.

Bloody stubborn child.

can i just say well done op?
its a difficult situation and you have made progress by getting her into a bra. she and you can finesse it over time but well done

I think I'd probably order a load frI'm somewhere that stocks large cup sizes and does free returns, then she can try them on at home without getting annoyed or embarrassed.

There's no way she is a 34 back. I'm a size 12 and wear either a 30 or 32 depending on the brand and style. Others have given great advice. Try orderbig the same bra in 28f, 28ff, 30f, 30ff, 32e (although this WILL be too loose around the back)

Freya do some pretty younger bras and some funky sports bras in bright colours.
You might have to experiment with the different cup styles like half cup, balcomette, etc to find what suits her shape.

34 will be far too big on a size 8. What will happen is that straps will end up supporting rather than the band doing the work. It can lead to back problems later on.

Try the bras on backwards to work out the band size. Then work on cup size, she may need different size cups depending on the style of bra and the make.

Use the boob or bust measurements. M&S are way out. I’ve always been an M&S 34C and my boobs are always been uncomfortable.

Boob or bust said actually I’m a 28E but as that back size is expensive I went to my sister size of 30DD and ordered some plain t shirt bras from M&S which are entirely sensible and comfortable

I think I did it right this time and got 28DD or E.

DD just come home. Told her I'm not sure it's right, she thinks it fit, I've told her I'll check it tomorrow and if it isn't right she has to accept she will have to be properly fitted. Little pest just said OK

Grrrrrrrr

Thank you AJP and thanks to everyone for all your advice.

If she’s a size 8 then 28 back sounds about right. Fingers crossed she has a match!

If you put your hands under your breasts and raise them up - this is what the correct band size will do, help the cups support from underneath. If the band is too large then the breasts point downwards and although they appear to fill the cup there is no actual support. The back strap is dragged up and the arm straps either dig in or give up and slide off. It can still 'look' as if it fits though, because thousands of women are fitted in M&S like this.

I've just done the boob or bust for me and it gives me a 34G. I'm currently in 36G or GG but I tried a bra on in Debenhams last week and was fitted as a 36FF. She said M&S are usually giving a size bigger. I honestly think I'd find a 34 too tight and given the cup size is a G I'm not surprised I'm confused .

We'll see what today brings with DD..

Sorry, I forgot about the style of Boux - I bought the plainest bra they had but it does still have padding (which I need after breastfeeding two babies). I think John Lewis do a 28 back but not sure what cup sizes - aimed at younger women/girls so should be more suitable.

We can get to Bluewater this week so any recommendations for shops that are good with teenagers would be good. Some bras I have seen on line are far too sexy for my liking for her.