What's the WORST bit of style and beauty advice you've ever been given?

[LazyCake]

Just that really, as a follow on from the recent thread on best pieces of advice.

Me first: I often hear the advice that women should wear less makeup as they get older, go for more muted colours and effects, etc. To me, this seems to be a tantamount to saying 'fade out, don't draw attention, become invisible.' My Dad's new girlfriend is 70+ and wears loads of makeup, which looks absolutely fab, IMO.

What are your worst pieces of advice?

From this very site - Babyliss Big Hair. Does nothing for me, complete waste of money!

Plucking eyebrows.

Getting talked into a pixie cut. I looked like some knackered old man. I aged about 20 years overnight and looked a lot heavier. I hated it. I was called mate a lot And what was worse was that my hair seemed to stop growing. I could colour it and have no roots 6 weeks later. Its taken 4 years just to grow to my chin. Thankfully once it got to my ears it remembered that it was supposed to grow and I now have to deal with roots again. I'm really happy about that!

And to add insult to injury it was no easier to deal with. It needed washing and styling every morning or would stick up at all sorts of weird angles. Never again. I'll stick with longer even when I'm 50!

Some of these are hilarious. Knackered old man and miserable surprised Dolmio puppet .

Yes to the bl**dy orange sticks and cuticles. I never chanced it, even though my Boots 17 gift set of nail varnish (featuring Twilight Teaser and Midnight Runner) contained several. Why would you do it? Pointless pain.

As a kid I used to buy old annuals from the church fete. They were usually of at least 6-10 years' vintage. There were always plenty of 'Diana' annuals from the mid 1970s and they were full of crap beauty advice:

Always use astringent twice a day if you have oily skin. Yeah, burn those pores!

Rinse your hair in vinegar. I will leave you to determine why this is a bad idea makes you smell like a chippy

Drink boiled water with lemon juice each morning

Brush your hair 100 times a night. The grease! The split ends!

'If you don't have much of a waist, wear a belt to define it.' Nope, it just screams "LOOK HOW MY WAIST IS AS BIG AS MY HIPS!!"

Oh jeez, YES! I can so relate to this!

nettle, the Hemsley sisters recommend the lemon and boiled water every morning! So funny, I wonder what other advice they've borrowed from 1970s Diana annuals...

Honeybunny Wasn't there a fashion for funny sticky out hair? You'd have been right on trend

I remember trying the baby oil one whilst still standing in the bath and then nearly broke my neck trying to get out of the then very slippy bath covered in baby oil! Was hard to get off the bath too - showers were treacherous for days!

was told by a number of friends to straighten my (very curly) hair when going to job interviews last year. apparently, I makes me look more 'professional'. never heard such nonsense before. anyhow, I ignored, went to 2 interviews and was offered both jobs.

I was getting ready in the work's loos for a team night out. I blended my foundation into my hairline, neck, ears etc. Younger colleague looked at me like I'd just shaved all my hair off & told me in a pitying voice that you're only supposed to put your orange foundation on your face - then left hers with a bloody great tide mark round her chin.

ANY websites/books/info for "dressing for your body shape".
Really?

1. dress same colour top and bottom
2. larger leg width on pants to balance size out ((pfft, clown pants)
3. never wear colour with black (ok maybe)
4. belt to create faux waist
5. longline coats to swamp you
6. BIG jewellery (I look like a kid wearing my mother's stuff)

ikiboo The only problem with blending your foundation onto your neck etc. are the horrible marks left on your clothes! Best to not to put too much on anyway

I never do . Colleague was of the 'slap on with a trowel' persuasion.

So your colleague basically wore a mask Weird!

"Dress your age". It took me years to learn to trust my own judgement and forget about age. I hate looking at photos of myself in my thirties - I look like a child dressed as one of the village fete ladies from Midsomer Murders.

Authentic CND Shellac doesnt damage nails.

Knock off cnd shellac & removing it with cheap acetone will though.

Unfortunately it's easy to buy fake cnd shellac. The web is literally flooded with it.

Thanks for the info Steviebuns. So the smug spiralised courgette sisters are cribbing tips from the old Diana annuals, eh?

The annuals were also full of advice about making Leo Sayer collages, knitting socks with toes in them and dancing like Pan's People. I look forward to the Hemsley sisters' new lifestyle guide (come on, they are so smug that they have GOT to be writing one).

Almost forgot! There was a two page feature in the 1975 Diana annual on the use of 'eau de cologne' as a beauty aid.

If you ran out of toothpaste you were supposed to mix it with bicarbonate of soda and clean your teeth with it (!!)

You could section your hair off and dab the cologne into the roots if you didn't have time to wash it 'before a date'.

Not forgetting, you were supposed to rub it between your palms before your date because 'it makes a pretty hand, like a shell, so lovely to hold in the cinema'.

We're on to you, Hemsley sisters!

To acid tone. Cue 6 months of acne.
To wear layers of bobbi brown stuff to cover my dark bags. It doesn't work; just makes them shiny and old looking. I find it better to just wear a smidge of corrector and accept that I look a bit tired all the time. Pretty and a bit tired can be a look! It's my look anyway!

Ooh and to not wash my hair every day. I have a fringe, fine hair and greasy skin. That doesn't work with the whole 'wash your hair as little as possible' school of thought. It just looks stringy and sad if I don't wash it most days.

Yes, and it feels nice, and like a little lift to wash your hair. So why go round looking like you're ill when you could just have clean hair.

Getting your colours done - fine in theory. In practice, I live in the UK, have to work, commute, look after children and don't have much time to shop - please tell me where these shops are that are full of warm, practical, professional clothes in mid-tone pinks, vibrant blues and corals between September and April?

I'll stick to black and grey unless it's summer thanks.

My DM told me in the eighties when I was a Spritely club going teenager " don't wear stilettos all the time they will cripple your feet ". Nah I loved my white stilettos and I danced in them three nights a week , I'm middle aged now and not a cripple .

Nettle That advice about cologne works on my hair anyway. I use my perfume spray to shuzz up my hair when I'm going to wash it the next day. Talc works too. My hair is dry so I don't wash it every day.

Let your hair dry naturally.

Apply some darker eyeshadow and black eyeliner to take you from a day to night look, if you're going straight out after work.

Didn't work for me.