How much do you trust the mirror vs a photo of yourself?

[Fuzzballs]

I know this sounds a bit silly but it's making me lose all confidence in how I look.
I look at myself in the mirror and whilst I don't see a supermodel looking back at me, I think I look ok, sometimes I am very happy with the way I look. Then I see a photo of myself and I see awful flat hair in a colour and style that doesn't suit me and makes me look old, I see someone two dress sizes bigger than I see in the mirror and someone who doesn't look good in their clothes, nothing flattering at all.
Why is this? I guess the camera doesn't lie so it this a case of me only liking the image I see of myself in the mirror from the front, and other angles look awful? It's upsetting me because other people must see me as I look in photos and all I see In those pictures is an ugly person. I know there is more to life than looks and I can accept how I look if only I didn't keep getting these upsetting surprises, why do I look so different in photos to in the mirror??

[toffeeboffin]

Hmm, good question.

I've come to the conclusion that I am totally not photogenic at all - so I tend to judge by the mirror more.

[toffeeboffin]

So true.

My SIL is tiny, probably a size four but in photos she looks like a size ten. The camera adds a least ten pounds so God help anyone normal sized!

[Fuzzballs]

Wow so many responses, seems I'm not the only one! Which is comforting in a way i think. With me it's not so much the facial pose photos it's the natural ones that people snap of you just talking to someone for example, I just look like so much bigger than I do in the mirror, it's just so confusing to the point that I don't know if I am tall and slim or actually quite large. At a size 14 it's one of those that could either way.

[Thefitfatty]

I have a friend whose a fashion photographer and when I knew him I was a size 6, yet every time I took a picture my upper arms looked massively fat, as in disproportionately fatter then the rest of me. He told me that that was something to do with the how the camera focuses on the thing closest to it first and many people take pictures with their arms out front due to how they pose. He taught me how to keep my arms out of the way and hold my head so pictures looked better. Unfortunately I've forgotten it all. He also said using the flash or standing in unforgiving lighting can make small flaws, like cellulite, or freckles, stand out far more then anyone looking at you with their naked eye would see.

[BadlyBehavedShoppingTrolley]

I think I look quite gorgeous in the mirror and then I see a photo and realised that my mirror really does lie.

[LuluandtheNightshade]

Unforgiving lighting! The worst!! Clothes shopping and big mirrors in big stores - God I look terrible - all my worst facial features glare out at me! If I thought I looked like that walking around all the time I would never go out!

[Abraid2]

Size 10 is really size 14 from 25 years ago. Most of us are larger than we think and the camera shows this. We eat too much. If you look at photos from the seventies, many women have slimmer faces and figures because there just wasn't as much appetizing food all over the place.

[P1nkP0ppy]

I avoid having photos like the plague.....so have to put up with the me in the mirror , and not impressed with it either!

[hollyisalovelyname]

I absolutely hate the way I look in photos also.
I think I look so awful.
I detest getting my picture taken.
Yet the mirror doesn't make me feel like that.

[DiscoDiva70]

In photos my face can look as flat as a pancake, yet in a mirror my face looks fine.

Mirror v photo? I don't know Wtf is the 'real' me!

[LuluandtheNightshade]

Abraid2 - I totally agree about the sizing. I am now a size 10 - what I was when I was 18 - it's a conspiracy by the fashion industry to make us think we are smaller than we are and also to recognise that everyone is now bigger. And yes - we are larger than we think - we have grown to tolerate a fatter society. Also it doesn't seem to be the same in the rest of Europe where sizing is normal and I notice that I am two sizes bigger suddenly! Personally I prefer a photo most of the time.

[southeastastra]

you can buy \link{http://www.grand-illusions.com/acatalog/True_Mirror.html\a true mirror}

[thegiddylimit]

Depends who is taking the photo as well. DH is a truly horrendous photographer, he tends not to zoom in so all the inperfections at the edge of the lens distorts the image, he tends to use the flash, he doesn't compose his pictures, he doesn't wait for people to pose for formal photos or for them to relax and look truly natural for informal ones, he also doesn't edit his photos so you see all the bad ones as well as the OK ones and his camera is a bit shite to begin with. He's taken pictures of people who have been horrified by their image and then I have to take a photo to show them it's not them, it's him.

Conversely I'm quite good at taking photos (and even better at hiding the terrible photos) and I've had people say 'your family always look gorgeous in your photos' and I think 'yes, but you didn't see the hundreds of other photos that were rejected'. E.g. if I'm taking a photo of the young cousins in the family (so lots of kids under 10) we'll get them all together in a good mood and I'll pick somewhere with an nice background preferably outside or somewhere with natural light, DH will stand behind me and do rabbit ears or jump out so the kids all look at him/me and the camera and laugh, then I'll take about 30 photos while he is being daft behind me. Only one of those photos will be sent to people.

[RealHuman]

They had one of those in a travelodge I stayed in once - at least, the corner the sink was in had two mirrors on adjoining walls, at right angles to one another. I stood in front of that for ages, just looking at myself the wrong way round!

[southeastastra]

ooh i wonder how easy it would be to make one realhuman

[SixtyFootDoll]

Gals it's not just me!
I am happy with what I see in the mirror ( unless it's the micro in the changing rooms at next then I look like a bag of porridge), but in photos I look awful.
Laughably so, in fact it's a running joke in my family that I am so I photogenic.
My mum is forever saying ' that photo doe st do you justice' 😀

[HappyGirlNow]

Ok... So I'm generally happy with my face in the mirror AND in normal photos...

BUT if I reverse the camera on my iPhone for a selfie (eg to check out new makeup) I look god awful, my face looks a different shape and everything!

Can anyone tell me why please???

[goodnessgraciousgoudaoriginal]

To be honest I think photographs are the most accurate.

It's true that you can get unflattering pictures - a bad angle, or pulling a weird face for example - but if you consistently think you look different in photos then it's more likely that it's because the picture of you in your head is not accurate.

I'm not very photogenic, so often don't picture very well, but I don't think I actually "look" different between the photo and the mirror so to speak.

[blueshoes]

For me, I think I look better in mirrors because my eye sight is not great and it is like soft focus. God help others who see the true me.

[JuliaHunt]

Depends on a lot of factors, I think

[CrazySheepLady]

I have exactly the same issue, OP. Now, after reading this thread, i feel thoroughly fed up.

[jacqattacq]

I’m the same. In the littoral I’m a size 12-14 hourglass, relatively slim although I. Can see that I would prefer how I looked if I lost a stone. I look curvy rather than fat. My hair looks ok most of the time, I have big, striking eyes, and skin is clear and even.

In photos I look 2 dress sizes bigger and as though flab is melting down all parts of my body. My hair is a weird fuzzy mess that looks a state cen when freshly cut, coloured and styled, my eyes are tiny and squinty like a bigs, my face is fat and my skin is really blotchy. I look like a completely different person.

[jacqattacq]

*in the mirror

[TheCountryGirl]

Two of my friends look beautiful in photos but in real life well, they are attractive but not as attractive as some friends who take terrible pictures. So I am not convinced the camera doesn't lie. It most certainly does.