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Style and beauty

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Original poster

2 year old has awful curly hair

104 replies

buildmeabuttercup · 19/03/2015 11:02

Okay I know I sound mean but I'm not honest. My dd has curly/wavy hair. Some of its beautiful tight curls, some of its wavy. It looks gorgeous when it's just been washed but after about an hour its frizzy and out of control.

Its always messy and she just looks like she's been dragged through a hedge backwards, and the more I brush it the more the curls go and its gets more frizzy and looks worse. Argh.

Any tips?

OP posts:

Thread gallery

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 20/03/2015 16:42

I'm going to look at a tangle tamer. I love the teezer and didnt think there could be an improvement on it!

Ive invested in a spray bottle and some conditioner. How much conditioner should i mix in with water?

I never dry her hair with a dryer, mines blew up and it scares her anyway so its always air dried.

I can imagine it will need brushing in the morning so will be trying spray and fingers instead. Fingers crossed. Will.update

OP posts:

dearth · 20/03/2015 16:52

She said "awful curly hair." Not "beautiful curly hair I am finding difficult to manage."

Children pick up their parents feelings, facial expressions, language, etc. If parents think the hair looks awful, the children will know.

Coumarin · 20/03/2015 16:55

I've gone a bit twitchy at the thought of brushing curly hair.

Good luck OP. I bet she looks utterly gorgeous.

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 20/03/2015 17:09

Yes I appreciate that I should have phrased it better in the title but I did reiterate several times in the thread that the curls themselves were not the issue and that they were beautiful it was the fact that they soon turned from gorgeous to frizzy and messy and looked like we hadn't be bothered to take any care with her hair (clearly my own fault for brushing it but in my defence I've never had to deal with curls before).

She is always told she has beautiful hair, I keep my opinions entirely to myself (apart from on here of course ). I only wanted some advice on how to treat her hair because nobody wants their kids to look messy, nobody!

OP posts:

Skivvywoman · 20/03/2015 17:34

The difference between the teezer and tamer is the tamer looks like a brush and much easier to deal with thick hair (or I find it easier) and it has bristles rather than hard plastic spikes

TinkerbellaPan · 20/03/2015 20:43

Haha bue! Didn't think of it like that! Matt is so useful though, not just for the cut, but for the styling and drying tips too.

OP the problem won't come from you, clearly you think she is gorgeous and will always tell her so! The issue will be when your dd gets to the age where they all start talking about hair and clothes etc, and she'll start to wish that she had long silky hair like her friends, rather than bushy hair she has to ponytail every day. If you get a routine going now, by the time she's a teen she'll have gorgeous curls that she'll love and can wear up or down

My DM has told me my hair is beautiful since I can remember. However I am well aware it was not, until I started using the curly girl method a couple of years ago. I could see in the mirror for my teenage years and for years after that that my hair was awful, so her saying it was lovely didn't help at all!

I'm rambling a bit but I guess I'm trying to say that by asking about it now, you are saving her a lot of hair woes in the future!

It would be worth reading and searching for some threads on the naturally curly talk forums and there is a British curlies site too, though it is smaller as it (clearly!) tends to be only uk posters. There will be posters on there who are very helpful indeed

Good luck and enjoy it too curly hair is amazing!

florascotia · 20/03/2015 21:02

OP am sure you mean very well. I'm sure also that you'll follow the lots of good advice already given here. So no problem. Your daughter will have her own ideas as she grows up, but I just wanted to say I've had curly hair all my life (am Scottish) and it really is part of my identity. Just perhaps your daughter will feel the same way. I can still remember not feeling happy when my mother wanted to make me 'tidy'. Even last year, a hairdresser I popped into for a trim asked me 'how I straightened my hair', as if that were the norm. I was offended and she was nonplussed... Am not going back there again!!

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 21/03/2015 11:57

I really did mean well. I love her curls I just clearly wasn't treating them right so they didnt look good like they should have.

Hair has been washed with shampoo and conditioner, patted down and left to air dry. Tangle teezed when wet. Beautiful curls. Have so far resisted any urge to brush hair .

they're so beautiful, the top half is straight and then from the middle onwards it falls into beautiful big curls, not extremely tight ringlets but definite bouncy curls.

I would post a picture but it will just be my luck somebody will know me!

Will be keeping her hair down today and tonight and trying the spray and run fingers through method in the morning

OP posts:

Whiteandbrownrabbit · 21/03/2015 13:30

great tips on here
that little girl with the pink band is adorable and gorgeous

Skivvywoman · 21/03/2015 20:26

Is her hair long enough to be tied up in a loose scrunchie?

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 21/03/2015 21:06

Its long enough to have a good size pony tail in

OP posts:

brakespeare · 21/03/2015 22:02

I know you think some people have been harsh but I do agree that as well as changing how you actually treat her hair, you might want to give some thought to your attitude to it. Your daughter will be bombarded with straight=beautiful and curly=crazy messages for the rest of her life and as her mum you are in a fantastic position to encourage her to think of natural as beautiful. Curly hair is a bit "messy" if you compare it with straight glossy hair but why bother? If you spend ages brushing, combing and giving it undue attention, the wanting it to change will be implied, whether you mean it or not.

Skivvywoman · 21/03/2015 22:50

Tie it up in a high pony with a scrunchie before bed

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 21/03/2015 22:53

It wasn't some people, it was one person who was damn right rude.

I have said repeatedly her natural hair is gorgeous and she is told this all the time. The problem was that I was brushing them out and 'ruining her hair'

I don't know why youre assuming I'm anything but positive to my dd, especially when I've already said I love her hair.

I asked for advice, not to be judged (wrongly).

OP posts:

Original poster

buildmeabuttercup · 21/03/2015 22:58

And as an aside, I have never once suggested that I think straight is beautiful and curly is not.

OP posts:

Nolim · 22/03/2015 08:53

Ant recomendations regarding hair accesories? Are regular hairclips the best option for curly hair that is not extremely curly?

Skivvywoman · 22/03/2015 22:06

Sainsburys do a rectangle hair clip in the kids department I always found those the best ones for my dd hair

Naicecuppatea · 23/03/2015 11:44

My DD has short, fine not-so-curly hair that frizzes terribly when brushed, so I am leaving out brushing from now on. I do need a recommendation for a good leave in conditioner that will prevent tangles and help encourage the curls. I washed it last night and it is already quite tangled, I can't really get my fingers through it.

Skivvywoman · 23/03/2015 16:51

Little original sprout one is really good if you pm me I can send you a bottle I've got, my dd hair is far to long for it now that's if you want it

Naicecuppatea · 24/03/2015 09:58

Skivvy, that would be so kind! However I can't seem to PM you.

killthewiseone · 24/03/2015 10:38

Is it ok for me to get some feedback as well? DD has very fine, quite curly hair. After following this thread I stopped brushing it and got some of the products mentioned - Johnson's no more tangle shampoo and conditioner, vitapointe leave-in conditioner, L'oreal detangling spray, and we're waiting for the tangle tamer to arrive. I was only washing it once or twice a week anyway, after which was always when it looks its best.

Anyway in my excitement at sorting out her curls I completely overlooked the fact that DD hates having her hair messed about with. She hates it being washed - so who knows why I thought shampoo and conditioning would be feasible, and she was not at all impressed when I used the detangling spray and leave-in conditioner on it today. It looked better than normal but wasn't the gorgeous ringlets she gets after a wash, and the conditioner made it look a bit greasy - possibly because it wasn't spread through very well, I didn't want to risk combing it.

So, is the detangling spray the best bet as a daily touch up thing? Or would I be better mixing the vitapointe with some conditioner? Are there any tips for doing this with a toddler that hates hair care? I do want to look after her hair properly, but also don't want to make a massive thing about her hair or turn it into an unpleasant chore.

killthewiseone · 24/03/2015 10:40

*vitapointe with some water

Naicecuppatea · 24/03/2015 11:20

*killthewise", I'm having the exact same issue as well. It is not curling beautifully, just looks a bit wavy, matted and tangled. This is despite using loads of leave-in conditioner this morning.

Cherryapple1 · 24/03/2015 11:23

Too much conditioning will just weigh it down really and make it greasy - it is a fine line. To get a good curl to set and hold its shape try a small amount of hair mousse. But you must always condition after shampooing if nothing else.

Helspopje · 24/03/2015 11:32

We kept cutting our dds hair as we mistook the frizz attempting to curl as split ends. Follow the curly girl method and grow it a bit and it will transform

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