I've been burying my head in the sand about how bad things have got, I looked in the mirror honestly today and I look like utter rubbish. I have know for a long time that things were bad, but instead of getting better it has got worse. I now have 12 days to a big event and I cannot bear to go looking how I do.
TBH I got away with a lot when I was younger and never really needed to do anything. I am tall, was slim and could get away with jeans and a fitted tee or a pretty top on a night out. I'm fair, have dark hair an pink lips so never really needed anything more than a little base, some blush and a slick of mascara.
Things started to change when I hit 33, I have always had a little grey but it really took over. I was very depressed and was on ADs for a while, I piled on the weight and started to look crap. Then I came off the ODs and never lost the weight. I started Uni and still wore jeans and t shirts but bigger not fitted ones, i didn't make any effort with myself. My relationship broke down and I became invisible and hid behind this ugly image.
I embarked on a healthy eating regime and doing the 30DS when I graduated, I lost a stone in a month and looked and felt a lot better. But things have slipped again. I've not gained any weight but I am bloated, my skin is dehydrated and I am generally disheveled with 2 inches of grey roots.
I want to turn this round but feel it is insurmountable, I have no style, I am 37 and live in jeans and t shirts. I can't do make up and I can't get away with it anymore, my skin tone has changed and I would look a million times better with some make up but am rubbish at it. I just look so tired and grey.
I'm drinking to much wine, coffee and diet coke and eating too much rubbish, I also smoke like a chimney. Not a good combination.
I'm going to have to turn this around in someway. I need to feel better and take care of myself so I look better. Any tips for how I can return to the human race.