What's the dress code for this Martha-Stewart-wet-dream Vermont wedding next week?

[NatureAbhorsAHoover]

What would you wear? It's at 4.30pm (or half past four o'clock, as it says on the achingly tasteful invite). There's no dress code I can see. It just says 'dinner, dancing and celebration to follow', and am pretty sure it's going to be v v WASPy and tasteful.

So is it day-at-the-races? or slinky cocktail wear? Or is it Oscars night??

cocktail I guess

PS ADORE your name, v good

I would ask -- could mean anything.

If it is literally in the woods I would wear flats and not heels.

gosh, thanks

mirpuppet no, it's at country club type place... have been researching and think maybe American weddings are more slinky nightimey dress code compared to English ones (am Antipodean and our weddings are much more slinky too half of my family dress like total slags )

God I'm jealous, I've always wanted to go to a big American wedding. What are your options so far? Give us some clues...

Don't wear the sort of dumpy floral frock people sometimes wear to British weddings (or maybe I am thinking of my aunts here and just can't shake the image out of my mind), and don't wear flats.

You would need a cocktail dress, even a black one, with attractive accessories, but absolutely not a shiny fabric or flashy in any way. If you're under 50 your dress can be over the knee. You would need pretty heels but not outrageous stilettos, and a clutch bag. In other words, 'achingly tasteful' .

My guess is the dancing will be pretty sedate.

Don't wear evening wear unless the invitation states 'black tie' -- and it wouldn't be black tie at 4.30 pm anyway, but a country club venue would expect to see smart cocktail wear for both men and women. People will be wearing good suits and chic dresses.

Americans love it when British guests wear stylish hats to weddings but they area a pita to transport across the Atlantic.

Well, is everyone from NYC and going up to Vermont for the wedding? As someone from Vermont, I cannot imagine actual Vermonters wearing cocktail dresses to a wedding, things I have been to have been less formal. Perhaps you can ask. Be warned, if it is outside and getting towards dusk, there are many more mosquitos there than there are here. Enjoy my lovely state!

Thanks math - can't imagine what 'sedate dancing' is... oh god, just had a horrible thought - people will still get good and drunk, won't they?

The thought of a sober wedding

I think it's very unlikely. Sorry.

Watch 'I love a Charade', the final episode of Sex and the City season 5? Posh Hamptons wedding.

or just go to martha stewart's website or any american wedding blog, there are zillions

My vvv preppy NH country clubbing yachty cousins tend to wear knee-length JCrew, Ann Taylor or Brooks Brothers at all times unless otherwise specified. They have even been seen in Vineyard Vines...one cousin wore something similar to this to a wedding last summer. Men tend to wear chinos and blue blazers.

However - there will be plenty of people there looking like they are from VT. People would rather see you as an exotic bird of paradise from a faraway land. You will win the evening if you show up topped with an enormous mad hat explosion, dressed like Helena Bonham-Carter, drawling like Joanna Lumley and talking about ma and pa and the family pile in lovely East Mumbleshire.

PS our lot do tend to get pretty smashed on wine spritzers, hard lemonade and tom collinses, so fingers crossed!

Am thinking something very demure yet very feminine, audrey hepburn, very ladylike.
Maybe watch some episodes of mad men for inspiration?

I think Tyelperion is on to something there - go quintessentially 'English' and you won't go to far wrong...

too

I dont think people will get drunk and start doing ups upside your head, for some reason. Or, having a fight on the dancefloor.

Ive never been to a fancy wedding in that state but, I have friends who have and getting drunk or, even tipsy is not done.

It will be an experience anyway. Will they be having the rehearsal dinner the night before, like they do on the telly?

Ooh, let's find her a 'quintessentially' (eccentric) English outfit...tweed jacket and silk evening dress anyone?

yes, yes, let's!
we need you shape, size, hairstyle?

nightwatch - YES! It's the full rehearsal dinner palaver the night before as well... honestly it sounds like a movie wedding and I am having difficulty treating it seriously

If anyone wants to dress me, am a big of nork size 10-12 . Blond hair that I will have blow dried on the day (thanks to grooming tip above). Am not wearing a sodding hat but go on, Helena-Bonham-Carter-me just for the fun of it

I will be getting shitfaced, and to hell with the consequences. It's a wedding and I have my own traditions to teach 'em.

Bought this purple dress on the weekend from the dreaded phase eight for work but might wear it with nude patent heels and ivory jacket?

Or should I be hitting the sale rack at Brooks Brothers in London and going hardcore WASP

US country weddings have pretty much the same dress code as Australian ones. Men will be in black tie.

That's a nice dress.

You could HBC-it up with some Victorian lace-up boots, cream coloured maybe.

Gawd just searched for some boots and found a fab website called Ladies' Emporium. They are US based so you could have them waiting for you and saving you on luggage allowance!

There are these you could try:

www.ladiesemporium.com/store/003210.php?__utma=1.1337474529.1340286673.1340286673.1340286673.1&__utmb=1.1.10.1340286673&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1340286673.1.1.utmcsr=avg|utmccn=%28organic%29|utmcmd=organic|utmctr=victorian%20boots&__utmv=-&__utmk=100866817

But personally think these are even better (and may be asking if you could bring me back a pair!)

www.ladiesemporium.com/store/004027.php?__utma=1.1337474529.1340286673.1340286673.1340286673.1&__utmb=1.3.10.1340286673&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1340286673.1.1.utmcsr=avg|utmccn=%28organic%29|utmcmd=organic|utmctr=victorian%20boots&__utmv=-&__utmk=109851269

Pants, trying again with the links:

www.ladiesemporium.com/store/003210.php?__utma=1.1337474529.1340286673.1340286673.1340286673.1&__utmb=1.1.10.1340286673&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1340286673.1.1.utmcsr=avg|utmccn=%28organic%29|utmcmd=organic|utmctr=victorian%20boots&__utmv=-&__utmk=100866817

and

www.ladiesemporium.com/store/004027.php?__utma=1.1337474529.1340286673.1340286673.1340286673.1&__utmb=1.3.10.1340286673&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1340286673.1.1.utmcsr=avg|utmccn=%28organic%29|utmcmd=organic|utmctr=victorian%20boots&__utmv=-&__utmk=109851269

Shoe size converter Those boots are fabulous.