AVIDLY addressing the key questions that WISE women ask....like 'full refund or credit note only?' and 'what this would item actually be on a cost-per-wear basis?'

[notyummy]

Hello all!

Ollie hope MU can blow niggles away. It will be fun. Did I miss it, did the Joseph dress go back?

Am on hour long 2-bus journey to my parents house as I have forgotten my keys on nursery run. Sob.

amber- I mean this in the nicest possible way. I think that you might be your own worst enemy at the moment. You take on a lot (really a lot)- two DC under 2, all cleaning, cooking, laundry, shopping, ironing and look fantastic on a daily basis! I am guilty similar behaviour ( although definitely not the looking fantastic bit)! I tend to get on with things/ be quite strong (DH also works ++ hours and no family support) and then suddenly flip at DH so it all seems a bit out of the blue to him). I know that you say you prefer to do your own cleaning and I can see what you mean but if you are really struggling (and it sounds as if you are), it might be better to try something different for a while. Obviously, if it doesn't work out, it could be changed again.
I also think that if you do absolutely everything for your adult partner, things become v easy for them (arguably too easy) and there is more potential for you to be taken for granted. It sounds as if your DH is already quite used to this (you mentioned his mum and first wife) so even more potential. It might be worth having a discussion with DH about some regular time to yourself (even if just a few hrs a month) or him always cooking on a Sunday or whatever.
I also think that the sleep deprivation is playing a huge part in you feeling so fed up. There are definitely steps that you can take to improve this and I would make that a priority as it can help so much in the longer term.
Right, mother hen lecture over :)

Mona - these threads started two years ago when there was a thread in S and B about buying no more clothes that a number of people were terrified by and suggested that what was needed was a thread about being more Wise in their purchasing, but still Avidly interested in clothes/outfits, and purchasing occasionally.....

I hate ironing, particularly shirts, and have always outsourced that. :)

Cool shoes, Pickled.

I have found a great babysitter for evenings, a teenager who lives on our street and only charges £7 per hour, so we can go out more, yay.

Blue, hope DD gives you more of a stretch in the night soon. I have those navy Nobody skinny jeans too, I like them.

My friend's sister just had triplets and she also has a 14 month old (I think I would run away!), I've been wondering if she is getting any sleep at all.

Ollie, hope you are ok. I like that WC top and a couple of the dresses. Have added them to my March list!

I ordered the Whistles hazel tops in white, pink and navy and the bright blue seam back tee, good basics.

I second (third?) outsourcing of ironing and in particular of shirts. I particularly like not having the ironing person at my home in my space! My local cleaners are my friends .

If you feel like a break from domesticity but don't want to commit to a regular cleaner, you can get a cleaning company in for a whole day spring clean. It requires a bit of set up (tidying and decluttering) but is totally fab.

Oh Amber, hope the bus journey is quick and not too perilous. A cab home, surely?!

Bloss, no need for the , you are the queen of the Classic Capsule wardrobe and surely this is the very item that belongs in said wardrobe. Cannot wait for your feedback there.

Annie you are absolutely right about parenting. Without harping on too much, I know my focus has not been quite where it should be and already, the huge efforts I've made today have seen such an improvement in DS' sense of well-being; fewer outbursts and lots more spontaneous kissing/cuddling from him. It's lovely.

Ollie understand you not wanting to go into too much detail but hope we can be sounding boards for you at MU. Really, really looking forward to it too .

Red - I often have days when I think 'could do better' but its that type of questioning that hopefully makes us better parents.

Amber - god, definitely get the ironing done. And I adore my cleaner - have had same one for 7 years and she's wonderful - I'd give up many things before her. She is so much better at cleaning than me.

Right so mih paris arrived and love them so much may just have to purchase the white ones.

But waiting for various refunds to hit my account before I do so.

Oh God. Just lost a huge post....(maybe a good thing)

Anyway, evening......

Red - Don't blame yourself...but agree with mrscb that introspection in these circumstances can lead to revelations which in turn may be beneficial. I found with my DS that a considerable amount of one to one time on a daily basis pays dividends, but it is difficult to always have the time, and you often have to juggle things: I find it particularly stressful when all three are bidding for my attention at the same time: invariably one will be on one loo upstairs; one downstairs and the eldest trying to read aloud...what to do!?

Amber - I use a monthly cleaning company, as Bonsoir recommends, and it is fab. I am a fussy old so and so, but they do a nice deep clean, and I feel it works very well. I also outsource shirts. Do believe that most women feel the same at the stage you are, sleep deprivation is horrific. Get some rest and things will immediately seem better.

I do love a Burberry trench. I should have bought one years ago to avoid all the costly mistakes. {rueful smile}

I have been a shopping. Bought Chanel April nail polish (and yes, it's lovely, mrscb), Destinee lipstick, Ralph Lauren scarf and bright mustard leather shopper for the holidays; and La Roche Posay skincare, of which I have heard great things....was tempted by some spring stuff but feel inclined to wait, although if we have a lovely weekend again, will be kicking myself.

I feel like I've had the never-ending day. On top of transferring reports to proper template, which has taken me hours, I have taught my 2 classes from hell and done a parents evening, where to my surprise, I have loads of pupils wanting to take my subjects next year! (As opposed to not a single one in year 10 this year). So really pleased, but still have to print the stupid reports, when dh comes off the computer.

there's BL to look forward to.
And also, the lady in the Obese programme last night was still 21 stone, and did 2 triathlons. I'm sure it is a realistic goal for me. DH is sceptical. I shall ignore.

everything, good to see you. I am doing what dauphin just said, buying the classic trench so that I'm not still going on about it next year! I bought the cheaper option last year, wore it every single day for about 7 months before switching to Aigle, and I think with my job, and my multiple school visits I want to look really polished. It should be here tomorrow. I am not buying anything else thisweek

Great to see all your posts today. Looking forward to meet up too ollie. Wear your grey janice! Shop the wardrobe!
Will not attempt to catch up and leave anyone out. Welcome new posters!

Just popping in to say I have a cleaner twice a week who does all my ironing. I hate ironing with a passion so money well spent!!!

Looking forward to MU. Have NO idea what I'll be wearing....

Seeing as there are a few delurking around here , thought I would send a message over the ether to notyummy and other library users about my ereader. It is this one. My library has started lending out ebooks, so I can access and reserve books without leaving the house and no reservation fee! I bought mine in the US but you can get them in WHS. The kobo bookstore tends to price match to the kindle book prices I've found. I've tried mine out next to a kindle and the screen is as good. Not sure all libraries are lending out ebooks at the moment but it will catch on soon. Needless to say, it is not a service that the Kindle supports at the moment (boo!) as they are raking in vast amounts of cash due to Kindle book sales.

Keep up the good work ladies! I love your links and have bought quite a few items thanks to your avidity and wisdom.

Oh Amber, you poor thing! Hope you got home reasonably painlessly.

NYE, you're alive!

We have gone TV free again with the DSs since we all recovered a bit from being ill. It is absolute bliss. And DS1's behaviour is just so much better, he's such a sweet, sunny boy when he doesn't watch any tv. Have no idea why he is so affected by it, but it becomes such a battle so quickly in a way nothing else does, and it's so much easier just not to turn it on at all.

Also no MU outfit plan as yet, although the Me and Em may win by virtue of being my only dress . On the very slim chance that I finish the dress I am making just now before MU I may wear that with a blazer, but it might be a bit wedding-guest (since I'm making it for that exact purpose). Will have to see how it turns out.

Bloss, NY et al, the Horizon programme (bbc2) on telly at the moment is really interesting, about current research about exercise, health benefits and weight loss, worth finding on the iplayer

I read something about it Apuski - 2 mins a week or somesuch! I can believe the health benefits may be true (as they appear to be well researched) but not sure you are going to get a lean/toned physique as a result. Perhaps one for those less vain than me who genuinely only care about the health benefits rather than the 'look' .

Thanks so much Pseudo - I will have to look into that! Don't think our library is doing ebooks yet, but perhaps I could lobby. And welcome.

Thanks Apuski, will have to have a watch. Maybe they can tell me how to make the calories from the six four rocky road bites I just ate not actually count

Good to see you NYE!

Welcome all de-lurkers and hi NYE

I keep looking at this silver cuff. Not expensive, could be good... Not sure!

I like it, Marsha.

Bloss, it is a very wise buy. Even my dh says buy quality (but he also adds not quantity, I ignore that bit).

I'm watching that programme, interesting.

Great links, NYE.

What were you inspired to buy, Pseudonymity?

I have seen the presenter for that Horizon programme (Dr someone?) in a few things and I have a slight crush on him .

Hopefully we have done the exact same thing re. the television and the impact that it has on DS' behaviour is phenomenal. Completely agree with you about the battle it becomes and so on. I think we may adopt a policy of films only on special occasions as an 'event'. And, as everyone here knows, I am a complete TV addict and no snob about it, but it really does have the most bizarre effect on him.

I'm not sure about the Birger cuff Marsha.

Lovely potentail MU outift there NYE and lovely to see you too.

I too get the ironing done and am do glad I do. Even though am SAHM I still have a cleaner once a fortnight. Feel slightly guilty but not enough to give her up. Please get some more help amber I'm sure it will make a difference. Hope you got home ok.

mrscb are you keeping the necklace? I wore it today and got three compliments on it and also felt it transformed a fairly classic outfit into something a bit more interesting. What colourdid you get in the mih Paris? Now I know a fellow shorty rates them I think I'll go for a pair too, probably either grey or white. I still fancy a rose pink and cobalt blue pair of jeans but think I may stick to TS as they're likely to be worn less.

nye how nice to have you back. Really like that dress. Hope you're feeling better.

hopefully you're making me feel bad with your tv ban! I've been cajoling my poor active DS to watch more in the hope of having some calm moments where I'm not having to panic about his exuberantly demonstrated affection for his new baby sister! It's so nice that he has accepted her so happily but his hugs and 'gentle pats' as he calls them are a terror to behold!

Yes thanks folks, I was blinded by seeing something quite cheap at Matches. I don't even do jewellery. Other than a watch, wedding and engagement ring. What was I thinking!

I don't feel guilty at all about the cleaner, I have to say. Even as a sahm. I either go for something or I don't.

But yes do get some help Amber it will hopefully give you some space.