Help for Untraditional Wedding Dress - Budget up to 3k?

[lesley33]

I am getting married in late summer. We are having a smallish informal type wedding - about 70 people. I want to look great on my big day, but I don't want a big white wedding dress. I am having trouble finding something suitable and I wondered whether anyone had any ideas?

I am 47, a size 16. 5ft 3 and would be an hourglass figure if still slimmer. I have dark hair and a "celtic" type face. I have large breasts - even when i was slim. After 4 DCs I have various lumps and bumps, so a dress could not be clingy. I also have disproportionately large upper arms so need a dress with a sleeve to at least the elbow. I don't want to wear a wrap that I constantly have to be adjusting.

I like stylish, elegant dresses and most colours, particularly red, but also green, blue and multi-coloured. Although I don't like gold colour. I don't like lots of ruffles i.e. too flouncy in a feminine way. I would prefer knee length or a long dress. And I have to be able to dance in it. Happy to spend less, but could spend up to 3k.

Any ideas?

There are some great dresses here www.whirlingturban.com/

You can have a bespoke dress made up to your measurements, choose your fabric etc. The "Peggy Would" styles come with short or long sleeves and in circle skirt style or more of a sarong/wiggle skirt. They are really well made with shirring up the sides which work like control wear to pull you in, but have a bit of give too due to the elastic.

Okay you asked for some links showing dresses I like. Web addresses below - sorry i can't figure out how to make them links! These are not suitable dresses for me, as either they don't have sleeves, they are black or I don't think they would suit my figure. But it is just to give you an idea of my taste. Thanks.

www.ghost.co.uk/dresses-ghost-heritage/emily-crepe-dress.html?color=258 - I would wear this, but not special enough for a wedding

www.sexyher.co.uk/product-Gorgeous%20Corset%20%20Ball%20Gown%20Prom%20Dress,%20puffy%20evening%20dress-513.html - in spite of being glittery, which I don't usually like

www.sexyher.co.uk/product-Gorgeous%20&%20Sexy%20Halter%20Neck%20Long%20Evening%20dress-512.html - would not suit me, but lovely

www.thelbdcollection.co.uk/Long_proms/Satin_long_evening_dress - would wear this if not for sleeves issue

www.thelbdcollection.co.uk/Long_proms/Stunning_evening_gown - don't like the sparkling straps, but gown is gorgeous.

www.lightinthebox.com/A-line-Off-the-shoulder-Floor-length-Chiffon-Mother-of-the-Bride-Dress_p83704.html - lovely, but no sleeves

www.lightinthebox.com/Chiffon-Trumpet--Mermaid-Sweetheart-Evening-Dress-Inspired-by-Angelina-Jolie-at-the-81st-Oscar--OSC013-_p46162.html - lovely, but black and no sleeves

www.lightinthebox.com/A-line-Strapless-Floor-length-Taffeta-Prom--Evening-Dress--FSD0221-_p140284.html

Actually this is my favourite dress, although I am not so keen on the wrap she is wearing. But I love the combination of simple and elegant, with the round details at waistband adding someting a bit different.

www.joanneflemingdesign.com/Gallery.aspx?ID=20

Sorry - reposted as have worked out how to do links now.

Okay you asked for some links showing dresses I like. Web addresses below - sorry i can't figure out how to make them links! These are not suitable dresses for me, as either they don't have sleeves, they are black or I don't think they would suit my figure. But it is just to give you an idea of my taste. Thanks.

www.ghost.co.uk/dresses-ghost-heritage/emily-crepe-dress.html?color=258 - I would wear this, but not special enough for a wedding

www.sexyher.co.uk/product-Gorgeous%20Corset%20%20Ball%20Gown%20Prom%20Dress,%20puffy%20evening%20dress-513.html - in spite of being glittery, which I don't usually like

www.sexyher.co.uk/product-Gorgeous%20&%20Sexy%20Halter%20Neck%20Long%20Evening%20dress-512.html - would not suit me, but lovely

www.thelbdcollection.co.uk/Long_proms/Satin_long_evening_dress - would wear this if not for sleeves issue

www.thelbdcollection.co.uk/Long_proms/Stunning_evening_gown - don't like the sparkling straps, but gown is gorgeous.

www.lightinthebox.com/A-line-Off-the-shoulder-Floor-length-Chiffon-Mother-of-the-Bride-Dress_p83704.html - lovely, but no sleeves

www.lightinthebox.com/Chiffon-Trumpet--Mermaid-Sweetheart-Evening-Dress-Inspired-by-Angelina-Jolie-at-the-81st-Oscar--OSC013-_p46162.html - lovely, but black and no sleeves

www.lightinthebox.com/A-line-Strapless-Floor-length-Taffeta-Prom--Evening-Dress--FSD0221-_p140284.html

I like this

That looks lovely with the winter cloak. Worth having a winter wedding for!

I'm still wondering whether it wouldn't make more sense to go for a dress and separate bolero? I'm quite broad in the arms/shoulders and have decided to do that, as it'll accentuate a nice hourglass shape as well as giving me a bit more cover.

I'm actually wondering about this, but with sleeves and perhaps three quarter length? And not quite such a deep v neck as otherwise my boobs would be hanging out. Only problem is I can't try it on. Do you think thsi would suit me?

www.joanneflemingdesign.com/Gallery.aspx?ID=20

othehugemanatee - A bolero could be s solution. But I'm not really sure what I would want in terms of a "look".

If you go to Joanne Fleming, she will make a toile first so you can check the neckline/sleeves/length you want etc before cutting the silk dress. I changed EVERYTHING on my wedding dress and had a zillion toile fittings (she probably had my face on a dart board by the end of it...) it's no problem - she will stand by with pins and huge scissors and just cut and pin til you're happy.

She does have some samples in the studio for you to try too, but not very many.

But presumably you would still have to pay if you decided no this dress doesn't suit me?

You pay in instalments - so you would pay for what she had done to date, but not the full amount. If you didn't like the first toile at all, she could start again.

I can't see which dress you're pointing out as the link just goes to a page with lots of different dresses on it?

I went through exactly the same thought processes as you before my wedding, I wanted something untraditional (and about as far as you can get from the floor length strapless meringue!).
It has been mentioned on this thread but Candy Anthony www.candyanthony.com/ is an option, but I thought the dresses were completely overpriced. I was quoted £4000 for a silk lace covered 50's style dress. In the end, I couldn't stomach the thought of spending £4000, so I came across the gorgeous Stephanie James Couture stephaniejamescouture.com/ whereupon a beautiful silk lace 50's style dress was made to my exact measurements and then shipped over to the UK. I believe that nowadays her dresses are stocked in the UK, but not sure where.
So it ended up being that I didn't try on a single wedding dress until my own wedding dress from Stephanie James arrived, bit of a gamble but it was simply perfect in every single way.

emsyj - The saskia dress - but changed to have three quarter length sleeves.

sailorvie - I agree I think candyanthony is expensive. Thanks for the other site.

Please choose the red velvet one with the coat. I think it is very romantic.

It's quite hard to see it with the furry jacket thing?

Do you like the Beverlywood? www.lookdarling.com/shop/dolly-couture-beverleywood/

That is my website so I probably shouldn't be posting links to it (sorry) but it has elbow length sleeves, tea length etc.

I love the saskia one, it is ethereal but with a modern twist. I'm not sure if you'd lose that if you added sleeves though. Would you have it in that colour, it is very unusual. I know the only comment I have made on this thread previously is to ask what your partner is going to wear, and I'm sorry if I sound preoccupied with her when its your thread , but you need to be slightly similar in theme too don't you. So her blouse and trousers would need to be more drapey/soft too.

Yes, I don't like the furry jacket.

Its fine to post links to your website. I do like the dress, but not for me. If I am having bespoke I actually prefer a longer dress. It is just off the shelf as I am only 5ft 3, most long dresses are too long.

pippilopngbottom - I love the colour of the saskia dress. But I am not good at imagining how clothes would look, so I wasn't sure if the sleeves would look good or not added on.

Good point about my partner! She hasn't chosen her blouse. But based on her taste I think she would go for smart black trousers and a colourful - probably multi coloured top or a red one. She doesn't tend to like drapy or pale colours. So much as I love it, the saskia dress probably wouldn't go.

Take a look at Vivian of Holloway. The way you describe yourself sounds about what my friend's shape was at the time of her wedding and she looked fantastic in a polka-dot halterneck circle dress. She wore a matching bolero with it. Not quite as long as you might want on your arms, but it still could work. Besides, you'll be looking so fantastic, no one will notice your elbows. .

The dress is lovely, but I would feel so self concious not having sleeves down to my elbows. It doesn't matter tbh if no-one else is looking at them, I want to feel that I look fabolous.

I don't agree that you need to match or blend with your partner really - I would go to see Jo Fleming and she will give you a free consultation and do a sketch of a suggested design then you can see what you think. You only pay once you want to order, it is free to go and see the samples, the fabric swatch books etc and get a sketch done.

You could just get a dress you like, and have a bolero made to match? Or go to a dressmaker who'll make you a set?

That way you've got options. If it's a warm day you might find that once you've had a gallon or so of champers relaxed a bit you don't care so much about showing your arms and really resent feeling hot in a long-sleeved dress. If you've got a sleeved bolero you at least have the option of wearing it or not.

That is true, you should feel fabulous. Perhaps something like that, then get a bolero with longer sleeves made? Or any style of dress you like with a long-sleeved bolero.

But I took another look around and also thought about your preference for a long dress. What about these two?

Chiffon Sleeved Dress

V-Neck Dress

I don't like the v-neck dress - the bow is too fussy. But I LOVE the chiffon dress. And with my big boobs it could look very flattering. Also because they will do it in any colour I could choose a colour that will match, or at least not clash, with my partner's outfit. Would that kind of style be flattering or just make me look fatter?

If flattering - then I think this is the one!

I like that, although personally prefer more fitted around the waist.

It's really hard to say without seeing you- it could go either way.