Help for Untraditional Wedding Dress - Budget up to 3k?

[lesley33]

I am getting married in late summer. We are having a smallish informal type wedding - about 70 people. I want to look great on my big day, but I don't want a big white wedding dress. I am having trouble finding something suitable and I wondered whether anyone had any ideas?

I am 47, a size 16. 5ft 3 and would be an hourglass figure if still slimmer. I have dark hair and a "celtic" type face. I have large breasts - even when i was slim. After 4 DCs I have various lumps and bumps, so a dress could not be clingy. I also have disproportionately large upper arms so need a dress with a sleeve to at least the elbow. I don't want to wear a wrap that I constantly have to be adjusting.

I like stylish, elegant dresses and most colours, particularly red, but also green, blue and multi-coloured. Although I don't like gold colour. I don't like lots of ruffles i.e. too flouncy in a feminine way. I would prefer knee length or a long dress. And I have to be able to dance in it. Happy to spend less, but could spend up to 3k.

Any ideas?

All the ones with sleeves are white wedding dresses.

lesley's other thread

Lesley - Candy Anthony will make you a dress exactly according to your specification, so if you want sleeves, or a bolero, or whatever, you can have 'em

TSC, if she goes to Monsoon with a £3k budget, I will KICK OFF

thesecondcoming - Honestly I am not trying to be yonique. Didn't put it in my post but the reason i don't want a traditional wedding dress is because I am a lesbian marrying my female partner. It would just seem "strange" to me to get married in a white wedding dress. What would my partner wear then? If she wears a white wedding dress it looks like 2 grooms are missing and if she wears a suit it looks like she is "pretending" to be a man. I know not all lesbian couples feel like this which is fine, but tbh I would feel a bit "strange" in a traditional wedding dress.

But I still want to look my best. So we each agreed to wear something we love, but that doesn't clash.

Yes I have looked in monsoon. I loved quite a few dresses when I looked last year - but didn't buy anything! Now anything I can see either I don't like or I love but it doesn't have sleeves.

Thanks - I will look at candy anthony

Oooh! Hope you will still all help me..everyone seems to have disappeared now

I am still here but packing up to go home. I am trying to think outside of 1950's dresses.

Thank you

Oh, I'm still obsessed going

Jenny Packham

Have you seen RocknRoll bride blog, and Offbeat bride?

I think the bored office workers day shift is mostly sprinting for the gin home now. Expect another slew of links after supper

FWIW my friend and her wife had complementary but non-identical dresses made at the same dressmaker. They definitely looked like they'd planned it, and the dresses were mostly white, but they weren't all princessy and virginal at all. Not sure what your OH's style is like, but that might be one approach?

Sorry - I hate the jenny packham dress. I think it is all the glittery look I'm not keen on.

shelldockley - No I haven't - I will look at those.

OTheHugeManatee - My DP isn't keen on a dress. She will probably go for a smart blouse/trouser combi. I want us to both look good, but feel comfortable and happy so we can really enjoy the day and she wouldn't feel comfortable in a dress.

Second Jenny Packham

www.jennypackham.com/

Cd122, 125 and 127 from the cruise collection are lovely.

I like the shape of cd122 - but not the glittery effect.

That's ok lesley, I hate it too. Am now linking dresses with sleeves.

Are you still considering knee length?

Meanwhile, have a browse on here and see if any vintage ones catch your eye...

I am a size 14 and hour glass, too, with a few bumps and lumps.

I would look at empire line, and also consult a good tailor, with that budget. I think that the 50s style can make an hour glass figure look large- arsed, even with a small waist. Does on me, anyway!

Another option if you like the 50s stuff is whirlingturbans - again will do to order so you can tailormake here's one with sleeves

If you don't want to go for something too trad, have you thought of looking at more general occasionwear? Ian Stuart might be a bit frilly from what you've said, but John Charles and others do some quite pretty outfits with matching jackets that would meet your knee-length, arms covered, not traditionally 'bridal' requirements while still being very definitely special occasion clothes.

I would avoid empire line, sorry- it will make an hourglass look pregnant.

I still think a dressmaker would be the best option. Either a copy of the Westwood one (I know what your partner means about black), or designed from scratch in response to some dresses you like.

I love Rock N Roll Bride, there are some amazing ideas on there.

Agree with Tethers. Bespoke is the way forward. Just scout around for dressmakers who do occasionwear, and choose one who a) makes stuff you like and b) you click with.

I think feeling like you click with the dressmaker is absolutely as important as them being good at making clothes. When I got engaged I went into frozen panic mode at the thought of navigating all those frilly shops staffed by pinched orange women who I thought would look me up and down and say sniffy things like 'no we don't do that above a size 10'. Luckily I found a lovely, mumsy, totally unpretentious and wonderfully gifted dressmaker who I clicked with immediately and who just makes me feel like she's listening and very capable.