Crepeys/Hagsnet - the moonlight beckons!

[MrsSchadenfreude]

Because moonlight gives you a nice glow and doesn't show up your wrinkles or grey hair.

Yes Kerry, can you beat 22 years? Not me, my friend, of course - DH is only 4 1/2 years younger than me

Skinny combats, Herbs No wonder you have a toyboy
I think I have put on nearly half a stone this summer. Back to the lettuce leaves

I am about to start work on a wimmins mag. There will be Lithe Young Things. Lettuce leaves will be luxury. Oh gawd.

Have tracked down pair of (Sainsbury's) black jeggings that are beginning to look distinctly careworn, but if I shorten them to capri length (wonderweb) and possibly run them round the machine with some Dylon black machine dye, they will Bridge An Important Gap.

Mr Inferior is a mere two years - OK, 26 months - younger than me

Wow Kerry!

She's not looking for long-term atm, but maybe there's hope

Where did you go Kerry? I could do with a holiday like that!

Great that it all worked out for you - it's always when you least expect it

Sheffield I went to uni there! It must have been the hills that did it!

Warning: I am SO PREMENSTRUAL I MAY KILL SOMEONE.

Either that, or collapse in weeping self-pity and loathing. Nearly posted on the 'porn' thread, completely irrelevantly, that I am so hideous that I am always amazed anyone is prepared to have sex with me. (Which is, broadly, true about the amazement, but possibly TMI for that thread.)

A small bowl of Bombay Mix has both cheered and saddened me

MI, go and punch something (preferably inanimate); alternatively, eat something sweet and stodgy then go and punch something.

I'm awaiting with interest the end of my first month on the mini-pill; I have a week or so to go before the black pre-menstrual cloud traditionally descends. The pill has done chuff-all for my absent libido, though (Kerry, can I borrow your DP? ).

Hello, fellow Hags. I woke up in agony having trapped a nerve in my back again, and realised that I MUST do something about my weight. Have just contacted local Lighter Life rep . My best friend lost 3 stone with them prior to major surgery, and another old mate lost 8 stone last year.I won't be able to exercise for some considerable time with bad back, and Plantar Fascitis in feet means I can't walk far any more, so desperate measures are called for. Need to shift at least 2 stone, preferably 3. Oh shit.

PMT? Do some people here still have PERIODS?

MrsF that doesn't sound good re exercise, but losing weight could certainly help. I'm not convinced about LL, but WW is great, and CV is the nocarbs expert.

CV, I tell you, HRT is the way to go

MrsF, it's our main topic of conversation......how irregular, how heavy, how moody, grumpy and hot-flushy we are all getting......

Sorry to hear about your back. As BTM says, can I heartily recommend low-carbing? I had that lovely middle-aged apple-shape until I gave up spuds/bread/rice etc. and am now a size 10 (hoorah!). Lots of MN threads on the subject.

Yes, BTM, I think all roads may eventually lead to HRT, especially if it means I get my, ahem, mojo back. I'll give it three months on the mini-pill.

Ah no, I feel all wrong here now with you lot and yr lithe younger partners. My dh is old enough to be Kerry's dh's grandad.

We are just back from Longleat, which means we have done 2 safari parks in less than a week and are, frankly, all safari-ed out. Only just restrained myself from throwing ds to the lions as he was being rather tedious.

Am beginning to think I should just give up on trying to look presentable and fashion myself some shift dresses out of potato sacks. It will go with my Worzel Gummidge hair. And it is possible that I may earn more as a scarecrow than in my usual employment.

Yes, so was my last dh. This one is is 17 years older.

Kerry, you fox !

Mrs F, I am a porker too, and need to do something about it. Am toying with the Dukan diet. Was on the phone to my mother last night and I mentioned that she and I could meet up in London with my Aunt Rachel next time I am back, for lunch. My mother said "Well you had better lose some weight before then, as Aunt Rachel thinks it is absolutely disgusting to be fat. She won't be seen out with her niece as she has let herself go so much." I refrained from saying that Aunt Rachel could go fuck herself then, and that I wouldn't be paying for her to push a lettuce leaf around a plate, and just ended the conversation rather abruptly. (It hadn't started well, with my mother claiming not to recognise my voice, and saying "Who?" when I called, as I hadn't phoned her for a week.)

My period started last night in a sort of half hearted way, but appears to have stopped again. Does anyone else usually start with a huge gush? [TMI alert] If I am lucky, I am on the loo at the time...

No big age gap either way here, dp a mere 11 days older than me (uni romance... I have been with dp forever). I need to shift some weight as would like to get back into two thuds of my wardrobe that currently is gathering dust. CV besides bread, pasta and the obvious stuff what else did you give up? I am fairly sure wine has to go.....

thuds? THIRDS fgs....

Sugar, obviously, in all its forms. Cereal, beans, root veg (except celeriac, strangely). You have to limit fruit at the start too. Funnily enough, you can get away with some alcohol, as long as it is "dry" (that's Baileys out). But you can scoff most veg, salads, cheese, mayonnaise, cream, and the key to the diet is to up the protein - lots and lots of eggs, chicken, fish, meat, yogurt, because it fills you up.

I cook for the family and then just adapt my plateful - i.e. I have my bolognaise with sauted courgette, and I skip rice for an extra pile of broccoli.

There are loads of threads on this, and diet books, I'm not very scientific in my approach but did what worked for me. I lost 1.5 stone over a few months, and it has stayed off for the past year with no trouble at all.

Dukan then really - problem is as veggie my protein intake is limited..