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Original poster

HELP! Suddenly I look really old.

107 replies

gramercy · 09/08/2010 15:37

Caught sight of myself in a mirror this morning - and have to admit that I look like a very haggard Sandi Toksvig.

I've always looked young for my age, but now, in my mid-40s, I look ancient.

I am very pale with fair hair, and all of a sudden about a million lines and wrinkles have appeared. My face is also always going red which is really attractive (not!).

I see someone like Orla Brady from Mistresses who is 49 and I want to weep: I look nothing like that.

What can I do? Any make-up tips? I know I can't stop the march of time but would anything make me look less grim?

OP posts:
moragbellingham · 09/08/2010 15:55

She's 49??????!!!!!!!

I like to tell myself that she has regular "stuff" done, like non-surgical facials etc. regular coiffuring and all the other pleasurable (and non) procedures.

From watching TV trash I know a new hairstyle can take years off along with new teeth (£££££).

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 16:35

Get some dermal fillers and botox.Wink They are a wonder- better than any fancy moisturiser! Botox you need to be careful with, and it doesn't last that long, (still wroth it though) but fillers last ages and don't 'freeze' your face.

If you are a bit lazy about make-up and hair grooming, get your act together and make the effort. (I'm a fine one to talkHmm)

And is your hair dragging your face down? If you've had the same style for years and it's quite severe or fringeless it might be time for something softer, or with more volume. (again - really should take my own adviceShock)

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 16:38

Thre is a website somewhere where you can upload your photo and superimpose loads of different hairstyles and colours on! Wonder if there is a similar one for bodies and clothing - like those little cut-out dollies and outfits that used to be on the back of Bunty? How fab would that be? Grin

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/08/2010 16:39

i read in the times this weekend that the best thing you can do (non surgicallY) is to have a really good facial massage.

Cheaper than botox.

Mind you, i am seriously considering botox because I saw myself in the rear view mirror in bright sunshine and I looked like the oldest woman in the world.

Been thinking about it for a while, might ibvest, is only couple of hundred quid so not as exoensuve as I originally thought.

Original poster
gramercy · 09/08/2010 17:58

I have long hair but I don't really want to cut it into a "hair-do" - I'm still trying to preserve the Stevie Nicks look (but have to admit I might be verging on looking like ageing male hair metal rockstar).

Where does one get ones colours done? Is it worth it? Where could I get a decent make-up lesson?

OP posts:
GreatOrmondSt · 09/08/2010 17:59

Firstly Orla Brady is 49?? Wow she looks amazing! I think we all have those days but if you're feeling down about your appearance, take a day out to pamper yourself; bubble bath, foot spa, face mask (massage if possible). For me, feeling refreshed does wonders for how I feel about myself. A new cut and colour can take years off you too, so maybe that's worth considering.

Amy

rufus101 · 09/08/2010 18:49

I am going to google her immediately! Can't believe she's 49! Had it in my head that she's 45 and even then thought she looked absolutely amazing!

rufus101 · 09/08/2010 18:51

OMG, March 1961. What am I doing wrong?!

emsyj · 09/08/2010 19:12

Make-up lesson - one to one at MAC for £50, redeemable against any purchases. Hour and a half, you'll never look back.

I know jack shit about hair and clothes, but make-up is something I have always managed to keep up to date!

Original poster
gramercy · 09/08/2010 19:14

I'm just looking at Trinny and Susannah in the side bar and they don't have hair-dos. I refuse to have one.

Orla Brady truly has found the elixir of youth.

It is quite annoying that loads of celebrities of around my age suddenly look much better (well, younger, at any rate!) than I do - or rather I look much worse.

OP posts:
Alibabaandthe40nappies · 09/08/2010 19:17

I reckon it's your hair. Long hair can be very ageing I think - sorry! Blush

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 20:30

A sort of agree about not having a 'hairdo' though. they can be naff. Unless it's a funky but simple crop, or a classic bob. Most 'styles' are either a bit common, or middle aged and frumpy. But you can still do something to give longish style-less hair a bit of oomph. It needs more body as you get older as it goes flatter. Maybe start getting regular blow-dries. There's nothing to make you feel better about yourself than that.

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/08/2010 20:43

I think hairdos are ageing tbh.

Think of all those middle age types who have 'wacky' short spikey hair with coloured bits a la Sharon Osbourne/that nutcase from Loose Women/Fern Britton.

Make sure you have your hair cut and trimmed, and perhaps consider a fringe. And don't have it layered too much (my mum had a layered hair cut once, she ended up looking like Rick Parfitt from the 70s)

cybilliberty · 09/08/2010 21:04

Get a fringe cut in

Try a subtle facial fake tan and a rosy blusher

wear more eye make up, use eyelash curlers

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 21:08

Yes, on reflection, Stevie Nicks needs to go. You know it makes sense.Grin

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 21:09

Thne thing is, you probably think you are doing Stevie Nicks, but you are, in fact, doing Rick parfitt. Shock

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/08/2010 21:09

Lol at those photos.

Christ the 70s have a lot to answer for.

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 21:13

Yes, interesting colour job on Stevie there.Hmm And that was on a world-renowned rock star, with money and stylists and everyfink. What colour is that exactly?Confused

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 21:15

That photo of Rick Parfitt is the best example ever of why I can't wear layers. Or go out in the rain. Shock

hellymelly · 09/08/2010 21:15

I think botox makes you look older actually.The strangeness of it makes the rest of the face look more knackered and you just look worked on,and rather sadly self-obsessed.I think because women tend to look at themselves in the mirror as a still image they don't notice how botox looks when they are chatting etc.And nose to mouth fillers.They look freaky too. Throw a bit more cash at your hair,update your makeup,buy something to wear that you really love and smile.That will make you look great.I'm 46 and I can see that I look suddenly older (fair skin again)but I would far rather look like Diane Von Firstenburg or Charlotte Rampling (no work) Than Nicole Kidman or Kylie.I see so many women our age on tv now who have completely destroyed their lovely faces with botox and lord know what else and it seems both sad and barmy.

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/08/2010 21:15

It's the bloody frizz. It looks like she has put 3 bottles of sun in on it, a bit of jolen bleach, dried it roughly with a 10000 watt hairdryer, put a can of elnett on and sat in the sun all day.

FellatioNelson · 09/08/2010 21:17

I think that's only true is you go OTT with them hellymelly, and start having lip implants etc. My botox and fillers were great - I didn't look very different TBH, I just looked well. Thye've all worn off now and I look knackered!

bluejeans · 09/08/2010 21:25

I'm still in shock as my MIL told me tonight my skin was glowing, reckon it's the only compliment she's paid me ever! I've been using L'Oreal Youth Code moisturiser for a while so wondering if it actually works!

Read somewhere recently that your 'first thing in the morning' face at 30 is your 'all-day' face at 40. Sadly true Smile

hellymelly · 09/08/2010 21:28

Hmm,well I've had friends who have had botox and you can always tell.Also ,as primates,we convey much of our emotion with our faces,and communicate with them as much as we do with language,so to loose any of ones range of expression is like suddenly losing a chunk of your vocabulary.I really think botox is horrible.There are also concerns now that the muscles atrophy over time,and as your facial muscles are interconnected then botox in one place may cause sagging somewhere else. I really like to look lovely,I used to have a job with a massive focus on the way I look so I am as vain as the next person,but I will never mess with my face.