Style rules you live by

[anyabanya]

Hi, I am just curious abut what style tips people have that improves their general appearance.

I am a bit of a mess really. I do not have a great sartorial eye, and always look a little as if i have just come in from mucking out horses. I am really trying to change my style.... i have become addicted blogs where people are trying to live chicly (is that a word?), like Anne Baronne's 'chic and slim' blog etc.

Despite my total messy nature, I do have a couple of rules I live by.... always wear dark toe polish; never wear competing patterns on clothes (so, horizontal stripes on a skirt and a top with a flower pattern for example).In winter I try and wear black and two other colours (black and emerald green is a fave) but other than that i seem to spend alot of time trying to look halfway decent... and failing.

I would love to hear what other people do.... what ideas they have in always looking good.

Call Womens Aid, immediately!

I'll invite you for dinner so he can see what lazy, pissed up cooking is all about :o

Aw thanks! Make it horrific please so mine last night seems like something to be grateful for.

I agree it wasn't great but then it wasn't awful either - perfectly edible. But it was a bit experimental, and ultimately wasn't worth the effort and expense. But they way he acted anyone would think I'd give people Fray Bentos pie and Angel Delight.

given, not give

Anyway, back to style....What's the best magazine to buy to keep abreast of what's expected of me next season then? Nice wearable sensible suggestions, not silly stuff.

Fellatio, my old man would have been over the moon with Fray Bentos and Angel Delight (not that I've made them for the best part of twenty years.)

(spiritmum tries frantically to locate the part of her brain that remembers what a 'dinner party' is...)

Aren't we always supposed to buy Vogue in March and October to keep up with the trends?

This is going to sound really odd but this time last year I found the best magazine for keeping me up with the trends in a wearable manner was....

Woman and Home.

BTW re dinner parties, why not get dh to cook? I'm sure he's very experimental?

Or, do what we do when we have friends around to eat (not really 'party' as it usually involves slinging art projects and catalogues off the table at the last minute and at least one dc wandering around in their pjs) - get a take-away. We usually get Turkish .

I'm sure that your dh will love both of the above suggestions.

~Oh, don't worry - I told him in no uncertain terms that he will be cooking for these particular friends next time!

I am generally known as being an ace cook and he likes to bask in in warm glow of my deflected glory . Which is fine, except I don't expect him to throw a strop when I have an off-day!

Can I ask about neutrals? I have very pale skin and red lips, blue eyes, and naturally mousy brown hair. I look dreadful in beiges, browns, mid greys. If I had had my colours done I would be a classic winter, I think. I look best in black and jewel colours like cerise, pillar box red, jade green and bright blue or purple. I can wear dark charcoal grey, and white, but not cream.

I am desperate to get away from the black trousers + coloured top thing, as I know fine well they make both look cheap, but I lack the confidence to wear my brights from top to toe.

I struggle with shoes. I think gorgeous expensive looking brown shoes and boots, and handbags look amazing, (eg natural leather satchels, or biker boots) but the colours just don't look right on me. Lots of black shoes look really cheap even if they're not.

What should I do re "neutral" accessories and basics? Particularly shoes and handbags, and trousers too, I guess.

(It's a bit harder for me as am 18-20, though shrinking through diet and exercise; I do, however, have a lovely decolletage and great boobs, and a little waist. Bad ankles and dreadfully heavy bum/hips.)

Sorry, massively long. But if someone could give some starter tips, I'd love to start looking after myself a bit more as I'm a bit dog's dinner at present. With my colouring, I should be able to carry off "striking".

Little, my colouring is the same as yours and I'm a 16 (14 bottom on a very good day ) with the chunkiest ankles known to humankind.

I do like neutrals but rarely wear them. I also suit charcoal grey v.v. much.

The colours that suit you only need to be near your face, so you can wear anything on your bottom half. I love charcoal trousers and brights such as purple and cerise go with this, as does white - you'd be knockout in a charcoal suit with white top, although I'm guessing that if you're like me you tend to bust out of shirts? You'd need a waisted single-breasted jacket which is long enough to cover your bottom half. Go for fabrics with weight which will hide any wobble (I know this to my cost - no more Ghost crepe pants for me )

You could also wear navy trousers, or chocolate with a white top - the chocolate will be away from your face, you just need to make sure you have the right colour on the top half. Bear in mind though that white tops need white teeth. Or how about going for something different like a deep dark emerald or sapphire on your lower half? Would work in winter fabric for trousers or linen for a summer skirt.

If you are wearing trousers you can go for shoes or boots in any colour so long as they don't clash with your trouser fabric. However, if you have a whole outfit in cools sticking brown boots on might look a bit odd. Personally I think well-made black shoes or boots look good so long as they are cared for. Your bags can be any colour - I know the style jury is out on this but I like the beautiful colours that Radley use, and there is no reason why you can't go for pretty shoes and boots, too, unless with a skirt. For skirts you need shoes and legs to be the same colour as it's elongating. I wear v.v. fine fishnets from Wolford. Re shoe shape, wedges are sooooooo flattering all year round, or go for a low-cut court with a chunky heel (on trend I believe right now) - avoid anything kitten heeled or spindly like the plague.

Fat ankles need flares/wide legs and I always wear maxi skirts in summer. I team the trousers with wrap dresses in heavy linen or wool crepe, or longer length wrap tunics. My coats are both single breasted and like frock coats in length (apart from my frumpy 'OMG it's cold' number from Millets) and I always wear a scoop neck if I'm not wearing a wrap top. I always cover my arms and have some longer wrap cardigans and also a nice single button long one which I like. Jumpers need to have lots of draping and the only ones which flatter me are weird ones by Zuza Bart.

Does that help or am I telling you what you know already?

Oooh, and for days when I can't find a wrap dress to wear (ones that aren't jersey being thin on the ground) I wear tops with low scoop necks and drapey fronts which confuse the eye. Last year I bought a nice selection from Wrap, and Monsoon sometimes do them too (when they aren't selling hideous empire-line jobs - urgh).

i have no style.

I can't ever find the things i like, the style I really want to dress in, for cheap enough. I am not prepared to spend £40 on a top, and unfortunately that is how much the ones I like seem to cost. I have expensive taste I guess! So, as I can't get what I want for the price I want, i wear whatever happens to be cheap.

I am a mess most of the time, sometimes bothered, sometimes not.

The thing I pay most attention to now is making sure I have well moisturised clear skin, so I moisturise with good moisturiser, use a lot of different stuff on my face to help it along (red skin balancing thingy, something which has sparkles in to make my skin look glowy, under eye concealer, which i also use in the creases around my nose and lip lip pencil/lip gloss to hide the wrinkles around m mouth!)

A good bra.

Pavlov, I'm usually dressed head to foot in eBay. £40 tops will turn up either BN or lightly worn and you'll be able to afford them.

i buy on ebay. But I just never know what I want, what I actually want is just too expensive even on ebay. I can't ever decide. that is my problem, so rather than go with something nice for a lot of money I go for £2 plain black tops in Next clearance. For example.

I spend more time and effort on buying beautiful things for DD instead

Ah, Trinny and Susannah have something to say about mums pending on dc and not themselves...which is partly what made me sharpen up a bit!

What suits you, do you know? It took me a while but now I do I just buy more of it and avoid everything else!

however, I do know what suits me though, should say that I guess even though I wear plain/cheap, I know I have broad shoulders that are well defined and look great in halterneck tops, especially as I have quite small boobs (did have before bf'ing DS!), so have a lot of of halterneck tops, and hipster jeans as they sit just underneath my slightly saggy belly, rather than dig into it, and emphasise my waist/hips. I like to wear nice belts/necklaces to detract from my clothes.

oh x-post! what do they say? is it baaaaaad?

My rules, for me are:
never wear black with any other colour other than white
moisturise everyday
clean freshly washed hair everyday, with no grey bits, I may be getting older (45) but colouring is the one cheap thing I can do, also a great haircut regularly trimmed
make-up each day even on a bad one, never leave the house without mascara or lipgloss
invest in good shoes and a handbag or two, people notice these, go cheaper on the clothes
sleep well, eat well, exercise regularly
have fun and smile

Yes, v.v. bad . Made me put lip gloss on for the school run, let me tell you!

Sounds like you have a cracking figure...I think looking like that you can get away with £2 tops!

spirit thank you probably less cracking now after the amount I am eating is now outweighing the amount of calories absorbed by DS My legs are too short, so its a pain to get trousers to fit, and petit size don't fit my hips right, and short is normally just a bit too short. don't look that great in skirts unless floor length and then again can't get the size.

I normally wear lip gloss, its amazing how much difference it makes to the face. I have a Chanel one from my wedding and it has sparkles in it, gives the lips a shimmer, and the sparkles seem to stay around even when the gloss has gone. Lovely.

What about black as the backdrop to colour on a print/pattern? That's ok surely? Please say yes or my new dress is no good!

Fellatio that's just my rule for me not in general, but I don't tend to wear many patterns either, as I am petite, just 5'2" and size 8, they swamp me so I stick with block colour, shift dresses, fitted jackets, boot cut jeans, always heels, make the legs look longer.

Course it is, Fellatio, it's a deliberate thing on the part of the designer. I have a v.nice maxi dress which is black with a print.

Pavlov, I wear floor length skirts too, and I need short length trousers but so do most people I talk to so maybe short isn't really that short?

Yes, lip gloss is amazing - I shove my shades on and get away with looking made up . I use a nude lip pencil under it as it gives it more staying power.

@ spiritmum - thank you so much! I'm glad you know what I'm trying to say. I don't wear as much white as I should, because I'm a bit of a non ironer, and white shirts tend to gape because of the bust. I should buy a couple of posh/detailed white shirts/blouses, I think - cheap ones tend to look a bit waitressy. I'm with you on the teeth - I have a bleaching kit that I use when I remember, when my teeth look whiter I also have more confidence to go with the red lipstick which looks great on me next to the pale skin (I like to think it makes me a bit like a fat Dita Von Teese).

I have never really been confident enough to wear chocolate brown as it's just not cool enough as a colour but I guess there are cooler versions that might be do-able - it's finding just the right shade which can be tricky. Navy makes me feel like my mum, but maybe in an expensive fabric it might be doable, but it's well outside my comfort zone.

I would definitely be up for emerald or sapphire trousers or skirts - it's a confidence thing, as I always worry it'll make me look too frumpy - like the Little Britain Fatfighter lady who has clearly had "her" colours done - it's finding them that's the problem, in my size, in a non frumpy style. But that should get easier as I lose weight.

I'm with you on the delicate shoes/kitten heels -my shoes need to be quite bold eg wedges or block/Cuban heels - to detract from the cankles and fat calves. I have a picture in my head of what I think would look good, it's finding it - coloured or black but interesting shoes or boots, with matching coloured tights - but can you find those things in wide calf sizes (boots) or fat sizes (re tights) ? Which is why I tend to default to black - which then takes me back to the What Colour option. Very frustrating. I go shopping with such intent but usually end up pissed off and frustrated at not finding what I know will suit me.

Yes to the wide legs/boot cuts, frock coats/ coloured leather handbags/ scoop necks, wrap dresses. I have a gorgeous Hobbs coat from years ago in scarlet which remains the most expensive item I ever bought (£350 at the time iirc), but having lost confidence a bit I don't wear it as much as I should, especially now most of my clothes are black and I'm fearful of looking like a flamenco dancer.

Thanks for the tips.

Ooooh, I lurve the Dita Von Teese idea, - you must be stunning! I don't do red lippy day-to-day but think lip gloss the same as my lips is fine. See, I was telling you what you know already .

Think red coat over black is fine.

Duo boots are for chunky calves. Wolford large fit me and they used to do an xl - assume they still do? - although not in all their styles.

Bitter chocolate is the best shade for cools - think Green and Blacks - for trousers you can wear any colour so long as it compliments what you are wearing on your top half. I agree with you re navy, I know it's a colour that I can wear but I can't bring myself to, except maybe for sailor pants.

A fitted white shirt that you button only from below the bust down worn over a fine white scoop necked vest would look v. sexy.

@ spiritmum I said "like to think", not stunning, but not bad. Mum says I have a "face for makeup" in that I look very plain without it, but can carry off quite bold makeup as I have good eyes, full lips, and defined cheekbones. Never pretty, but in the right light I can look striking.

I like the fitted shirt over vest idea - I'll try that. Thanks.

I have the same trouble with fitted shirts, baggy waist or gapey bust) so I buy them to fit my waist, and leave the top few buttons undone with a contrasting camisole underneath, for elegant and subtle nork spillage.