When you want to blend a family....

[Blushingm]

I've been with DP around 2 1/2 years. My DC are grown up - DD is off to uni now and DS is 23 and working full time.

DP and I have discussed that we would love to live together - it makes sense with regard to being a couple and also financially.

He has 2 DS. Aged 12 & 15. He has them almost 50/50 with his exw (6 days out of 14). His eldest DS refuses to even talk about me, let alone meet me and won't say why. The youngest is really laid back and has no issue.

How can we over come this? Has anyone else come up against this and how did you over come it?

My OH and tried various ways of blending for two years and it was logistically too difficult. We couldn’t live together as when we met we and our kids were settled some 50 miles away from each other. We now have arranged to have our respective kids 50-50 with exes on different days (his Monday to Weds and mine Thurs to Sun) and we travel between our two houses. The exes were accommodating with the schedule. We realised our main priority was to be with each other as much as possible, not to blend kids. We parent our two sets of kids together when we have them. I keep kicking myself that it took us so long to work this out. The kids get on and would like to see each other more but we’re putting ourselves first. The kids all have many of their own friends, cousins etc. On balance because my OH and I are happy, kids are happy.