DSC want a pet

[plumduck]

Aibu to put my foot down and say no? They have pets at their mum's and they are only here EOW and part of the holidays. I just don't want to have to deal with a pet. We're talking rat, fish or gerbil that sort of thing so not a dog or cat but still.

God forbid they should look forward to seeing their father or younger siblings.

Who gives a shit about looking like the bad guy? It’s far preferable to being stuck with yet more responsibility you don’t want or have capacity for. Just let that go for a start.

Wtf

Things they look forward to

Seeing us
Snack box!
Netflix
Often a trip to the cinema or out to the shops
More freedom to go out due to our location

@playyourcardswrite no just being honest with children actually. Because that's why op is saying no and gives a opportunity for change and DSC to get a pet

But maybe that's my asd.

OP seems to be open to getting a pet if her DH put in more effort on the division of labour, then I think actually think that it should be put out as a option.

It's not actually a weird concept being honest with kids, op doesn't need to be unkind just factual, it's not like they won't see the division of labour. They don't live in a bubble.

But maybe that is a different concept to people idk 🤷🏼‍♀️

And I mean on the other spectrum- wtf

They are seeing their dad, their family.

A pets a nice to have but it's not a essential 😵‍💫

The more I think about it op it's really probably not worth the drama. Esp if they die and the death convo is not a fun one (I know by experience.)

Your totally ok to say no, if they were there daily it would be comparable to your own Dc but since they aren't it doesn't make it workable.

lol

Well that's me told 😒

Do you have a friend who has a dog that you could perhaps take for a walk when they come?

Their dad?

Why are they there so little?

Because dad can't be arsed to have them any more. Is that what you want to hear?!!

Because of distance. Their mum moved. He goes to see them one evening mid week too but I didn't include that as the pet wouldn't go with him 😅

No. We have many neighbourhood cats though.

It’s crap that your DH is making you the bad guy. But as @AnneLovesGilbert says, just ignore.

And definitely ignore the weird troll messages.

YADNBU
Nope. Stick to your guns.

Even fish are loads of work. We have a dog snd 2 cats and the added fish nearly broke me. Don't do it and never do it unless you decide that you want a pet.

I'd approach it from the point of view that it's absolutely unfair on the animals to only have interaction EOW. Double whammy that the animals are unlikely to become tame with such sporadic contact therefore the DSC will likely lose interest and so the cycle continues. Don't do it.

Not a chance.

Tell them you’ll consider a tamagotchi.
Or a venus flytrap/similar cool plant?
Maybe a cactus - then it won’t need watering between visits.

Not a runner - if you wanted a pet then fair enough but its not practical in the current circumstances.

However maybe it helps with ideas for days out/Christmas gifts etc -is there any animal based venues near ye - next year a membership of gift and sponsor an animal that they can visit?

Pet? When they are visiting eow?? Ok but they will need to take it to their mum when they are away. I wouldn't do anything. Not a thing.

This 👆🏼. Or just get a bird table and some fat balls for the garden.
Stick to your guns. If we had every pet my DSD asked for we would own a zoo by now!