Eviction of stepson

Jbloggg123 · 2023-01-06T21:02:02+00:00

My 18 year old stepson has physically assaulted me 3 times. I have never reported this as I donf want him to have a criminal record. It was the final straw causing my wife and I to separate as she failed to support my wanting to evict him. We are joint owners of the property and all still live under the same roof along with our six year son also. It is a living nightmare. Can I legally get my stepson removed. Oh he also smokes weed in the house.

SpaceshiptoMars · 06/01/2023 22:00

Does your wife want him to stay?

thunderstruckk · 06/01/2023 22:01

Get him reported to the police. If he's willing to assault you three times in your own home you're protecting the wrong person by worrying about him getting a record. Think of your 6 year old growing up in this toxic environment.

Hallmark1234 · 06/01/2023 22:05

Please report the assaults. He clearly doesn't respect you. It will escalate.

Whotsit · 06/01/2023 22:07

Call the police. Report all the incidents.

onyttig · 06/01/2023 22:10

You need to call the police me report this stuff for everyone’s sake. Your 6 year old shouldn’t be living in that environment.

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 22:17

Yes I understand all that everyone is saying and I am trying to shield my young son from all that is happening but I have bought my stepson up since he was 3 so consider him to be mine.
I just am looking for a legal way of getting him removed from the family home, reporting him will not have that effect just give him a record and potentially destroy his future.

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SpaceshiptoMars · 06/01/2023 22:18

Change the locks?

onyttig · 06/01/2023 22:21

In many ways though calling the police is part of helping your SS. His violence is a huge problem and he needs intervention.

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 22:29

Understood, but it would also increase the already awful environment we all currently inhabit

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thunderstruckk · 06/01/2023 22:33

I don't think there is a legal way to do that when your partner doesn't want to and the house is jointly owned. Can you both just sell the property and move into two separate houses?

TallTalesForShortAdults · 06/01/2023 22:41

Whatever you do your young son now has to be the priority for you. Even if SS were your son, he is an adult and your 6 year old is a child who needs your protection. If there is no way to remove SS then I'd be removing myself and my young child from that environment if at all possible.

That's not to say you shouldn't be helping SS get the support he obviously needs but I would refuse to subject my 6 year old to that way of life. You'll end up with two messed up kids rather than potentially only one.

onyttig · 06/01/2023 22:57

If you don’t report it to the police you will have no evidence for removing the 6 year old from the violent environment his mother is unwilling to protect him from.

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 22:58

I am very keen for my YO to remain in the family home, the separation of my wife and i is going to be hard enough.
We are just going through mediation in order to find a way forward as regards selling up etc. We are joint owners but she has hardly contributed at all financially even though she works full-time.

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DolphinWars · 06/01/2023 23:01

Call the police, every time. This won’t ruin his life - he’s already doing that to himself.

Calling police may give him a shock enough to sort things out, or to get some help for his anger issues.

AnneLovesGilbert · 06/01/2023 23:02

Call the police. Next time you might get badly invited. And your son is living in a home with serious domestic violence. If he tells someone at school you’ll have really big trouble to deal with.

You need to report him and get him out and get your son away from the abuser and his mum is enabling abuse.

Take this seriously.

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 23:06

I have notified my YO school that we are experiencing problems at home and for them to keep an eye on him should he show any signs of distress. I have also spoken to a social worker, they have said that unless my YO is in immediate danger they can't do anything.

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SpaceshiptoMars · 06/01/2023 23:09

Can you split the house with partition walls?

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 23:12

SpaceshiptoMars · 06/01/2023 23:09

Can you split the house with partition walls?

Oh if only...lol reminds me of an episode of steptoe and son....need to be of a certain age to get that reference

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TallTalesForShortAdults · 06/01/2023 23:14

I am very keen for my YO to remain in the family home, the separation of my wife and i is going to be hard enough

But surely that isn't actually the best thing for him if your SS is there?

What happens when you and your wife separate? Are you planning on getting completely new houses or is your wife/you likely to stay in the family home and the other leave?

Whatever happens do not let your son live full time with an angry violent sibling who's mother isn't protecting him. Yes even if that means removing him from the family home. Surely your son would prefer a calm, non violent home to live in even if it's not the same house?

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 23:24

Of course that is what I have always wanted and always tried to create, but my wife also wants custody, so i cant just take him and go, though would dearly love to. In all honesty she has never been maternal so I do think I will get custody because of several things in our past, so ideally yes I want to remain in the family home.
My Ss is not constantly violent and he is OK with my YO.

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SpaceshiptoMars · 06/01/2023 23:32

Cheaper area, two houses/flats close to each other?

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 06/01/2023 23:37

We have another property which we rent out, I have told my wife we can sell that and she can have the lions share of the profit in order to buy another house.
This is not my real issue.....I need to find a way of evicting SS?

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AnneLovesGilbert · 06/01/2023 23:57

Few people are “constantly violent”. Once is enough. You’re focussing on the wrong thing and you’re not going to get advice that means you can evict him when your wife enables him and you and she both have a right to live in the house and she still wants him there. Was his father violent?

You need to get a divorce, report SS and make as many waves as you can about what’s going on in your home as you can with school, social services, the police. In order to keep your child safe you need a pause trail and proof his mum doesn’t care about his safety and is happy to keep him in a violent home.

Original poster

Jbloggg123 · 07/01/2023 00:05

AnneLovesGilbert · 06/01/2023 23:57

Few people are “constantly violent”. Once is enough. You’re focussing on the wrong thing and you’re not going to get advice that means you can evict him when your wife enables him and you and she both have a right to live in the house and she still wants him there. Was his father violent?

You need to get a divorce, report SS and make as many waves as you can about what’s going on in your home as you can with school, social services, the police. In order to keep your child safe you need a pause trail and proof his mum doesn’t care about his safety and is happy to keep him in a violent home.

You are absolutely right....I was hoping I could dort this all out as amicably as possible but it's not going to happen.
You have given really solid advice which I will implement.
Already started the divorce proceedings and I will reports my ss.
Thank you, think I always new what I needed to do just wanted someone to spell it out for me.

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Choccolatte · 07/01/2023 00:13

I agree you shouldn't put up with violence. However to say you treat him as you would your own child is disingenuous. If you did you wouldn't have mentioned the step bit so readily. I say this as a step parent and understand the difference. The advice would be very different if he was your son. That said you need to act strongly.