Am I the selfish one?!

[Childlessmum1]

Back in Jan 2022 I got back with my childhood sweetheart. He now has a 4 year old who is 'the apple of his eye'. She rules the roost and I don't get one single look in. I need advice on one of the many things that have occurred! He sleeps on my living room floor with her on a air bed and I'm not to sleep upstairs in bed because I look selfish or like I'm not interested (even after interacting all day) tonight she put my big quilt in her big tent and her dad had his blanket on the air bed and I was on the sofa with a dressing gown over me, she was cwtched in with her dad so I grabbed my quilt out of her tent and she screamed and he told me to leave it , watched me get back on the sofa with my dressing gown knowing full well the quilt will not be used!!! I told him I feel completely disrespected as I would never do that to him and quite frankly think it's poor parenting as he should have told her she's not using it so I am but after saying that he called me selfish and weird!!! I am loosing the plot over how I'm constantly last and can't even have an opinion when it comes to his child.
Should I just leave as I'm clearly not wanted and let him be sorry for loosing me?

OP do yourself a favour. Don’t walk away from this relationship….. run and don’t look back!

This will absolutely not get better. I speak from experience.

And no, of course you’re not the selfish one.

What?! You’re all sleeping in the living room and you’re not even allowed a blanket?

This is so fucked up!

This is so unreasonable of him. He's so out of order. I hope you grabbed your quilt and went back to bed. This relationship is not going to get any better I would run away fast.

He's a dick. You can do better

i really would leave this relationship asap; I’ve done some things to bend over backwards to make DSD comfortable but this is a whole new level. I also think looking at the future that the is is only going to get worse. Being a step parent isn’t easy but DH and I have always discussed things and there’s never been an issue of who is more important or priotised as there have always been boundaries

There is pandering and then there utterly bonkers. Your dp is literally creating a monster. Do not do this anymore. Your dp's thinking is quite frankly weird and controlling. Who the hell does he think he is?

Before long - if not already- you will feel like a third wheel in your own relationship. It isn't healthy for anyone as things stand already op.
Time to get rid...
And don't look back.

It's going to get alot worse due to poor parenting. That child's going to become a self entitled brat, who will lie to dad to get you into trouble whenever she feels slighted. Honestly, finish the relationship, you can do so much better, you don't deserve this.

He isn’t doing his daughter any favours by pandering like this. Children need to know that they have to go to bed. You can be more lenient with babies but this child is four and old enough to sleep alone. I can only assume he feels guilt about being separated and that’s why he’s pandering and failing to parent. I doubt this is the only time he’s failing to parent as well - it’ll be all the time. Start by speaking to him, but if he really isn’t going to parent properly then you need to leave.

I think when you enter a family dynamic the onus is always on the step parent to fit in and not try to change things. Having said that, I’m not sure how you sleeping on the sofa aides things here.

I couldn’t put up with this situation so I would leave.

Where's all the 'why have you even met her yet' comments?

I agree with PP though, get rid. If it's like this now who knows what other bat shit situations you might find yourself or future children in.

🤣🤣🤣 I’m always surprised by the ‘a year isn’t long enough’.

a decade. Minimum. 🤣

There are so many more men out there.

Men like him don’t deserve to have a girlfriend and should remain single, but of course he thinks he should be able to have one.

Is this your house?

Him and his little princess would be having an adventure getting the fuck out of my house.

Why are you putting up with this shit?

What???!!!! You're sleeping on the sofa without your duvet in your own home because your partner insists on it to appease a four year old who isn't even your child?
Fuck that!
Tell him to grow up and parent. Or show him the door. Or both.

Run, don’t walk, run.

Bloody hell, leave. This level of pandering so creepy and weird.

So basically he doesn't parent her and just lets her do as she likes. I think you know the answer to this one, Ditch him and fast.
If he wants to sleep with her on an air mend that's up to him but u shld be in ur own bed with ur own covers. Tell him where to go, pronto. He's the selfish prick not u!