What age is too old to apply sun cream to a teen?

[Chichila]

Feel like what I am seeing is a bit weird but I am not sure it’s just different to my own parenting of teens

So you would rather your daughters suffered sun burn and increased risk of skin cancer because you feel odd about a parent putting suncream on their child.

Unless you have an actual octopus for a child they will need an adult to put suncream on their back.

I just put sun cream on my DS's back this evening, he is 22. Never occurred to me I shouldn't

Why don’t you do it if you’re uncomfortable? Someone needs to do a back to make sure it’s properly covered. Nobody can reliably do their own properly.

Every age needs help with their back surely

Otherwise my 12 year old does his own

Surely help can be given at any age? It's sun cream not tingly lube....

I help ds 20 on his back, but only when asked.

It's the legs not the back for me IMO - but I didn't grow up in a touchy feely household plus think it is a boundary. I would have found it weird if my dad rubbed suncream in my thighs/or my mum or any adult!

OP someone said on here once that her DH babying his dc made him happy and she had to accept it or forever grit her teeth. Whether it's right or wrong, healthy or unhealthy if it works for them and you don't believe it to be abuse then find a way to accept it.

Dd does most of her body and has since 12 ish. Where she can reach. Her dad or I do her back… including under bikini strap. So she doesn’t burn. She does my back sometimes if dh is asleep on a sun lounger. . Never thought about it till this post tbh. Just practical (dd did burn her feet this year as didn’t apply properly so ruined some socks keeping feet covered up for a few days)

I still ask someone to do my back now, it’s normal, surely? Otherwise you’d miss areas.

Unless there is other behaviour that makes you suspect ulterior motives?

Well unless someone is a bloody octopus they'd have trouble doing their own back.

Stop making a problem when there isn't one.

How should they get it on their back then? Or do you just burn your back since you have nobody to put it on for you?

I think it honestly depends, but you’ve deliberately included no context, so it can’t really be answered. If it’s a dad saying to his teen ‘come here, I’ll do your back if you want since it’s not covered’ then that’s normal family life. If it’s a dad undressing his teenage daughter to massage sun cream into her entire body that’s obviously extremely worrying and awful. But presumably the context is the dad said ‘want me to do your back?’ And then rubbed some sun cream on her back. Which is normal.

Why would anyone need someone else to suncream their legs? Legs and backs are totally different. Backs are a practical necessity, so I don't think there is an age. Legs, surely everyone can reach their own legs unless they have some sort of disability?

On their back? Any age. Why wouldn't you?

Legs? 9ish with supervision.

Well it’s not really about whether or not op is uncomfortable. Her applying it might make the stepdaughter uncomfortable. And as it’s the stepdaughter who is actually involved it’s her who matters.

Obviously if her husband is a pervert who’s sexually abusing his own daughter that doesn’t apply, but I’m sure if there was context suggesting that’s an issue op would have included it as it’s relevant, and suncream would be the least of her worries.

This. Not touching up just being a family.

It is ok if a child doesn't want help and ok if they do. I still put cream on my older teen and he puts it on me. It isn't sexual if that's what worries you.

My dad did my back for me throughout my teens and I did his. As I would with anyone in my family
I've even helped a stranger at a festival put on suncream
Its suncream- not a sex act.
Unless they don't want the help and its being forced on them, you are being weird

Pretty normal I think. I’ve got teens and still spray them and ask them to rub in where I’ve sprayed. I do their backs. They recently went away with their dad and his partner and came back horribly sun burned. I’d much rather their dad had helped them 😥

When you offer and they say "no thanks", that's the age.
If I was out somewhere sunny with my mum, I would ask her to do my neck/back and I'm 30. Why is it inappropriate?

I do the kids backs (ds 15 and dd 18).I also do dhs back.and he does mine. How else do you stop a back getting burned?

Why is everyone so fixated on the back when it's clearly the legs bit that is a bit odd?? I'd find it very weird watching someone rub cream intro a teenage girls legs as it just isn't necessary.

It was OP’s own post of 21.58 that seemed to suggest she was uncomfortable.

I am not a fan of this “concerned about the way my husband and stepdaughter interact” sub genre of thread myself.

Again though, op is refusing to include any context. This could be him spraying some cream onto her legs after doing her back or it could be him sensually massaging cream into her inner thighs. Two different scenarios and impossible to comment on if op wants to be vague about it.

Either way, if she thinks her husband is behaving inappropriately towards his own daughter then stopping him using sun cream on her is literally a drop in the ocean.

You do sound a bit mean-spirited, I'm afraid. Would you prefer them to burn?

There's no "too old" for a bit of help applying sunblock to hard-to-reach places. There's no age at which we suddenly stop caring for our children, either. My eldest is 20 and at uni. I still remind him to put sun cream on - I'm his mum.

I know op is uncomfortable with it. What I was saying is (unless she suspects her husband of being a paedophile who abuses his own child) her discomfort isn’t relevant. Unless her SD is uncomfortable (in which case her father is behaving inappropriately) then her discomfort shouldn’t affect her SD.

What a stupid thing to say and then teen gets badly sunburnt and you blame mil for not applying it ffs