Names for step-grandma

[TGLucie]

My partner's step-mum was never the nicest to him and made comments like 'I won't be a grandma until my own children have kids'. That has stuck with my partner and he was adamant that she wouldn't be called grandma and that his own Mum has earns that title (Well, Nanna).

I feel bad for her because she seems totally different now that we have our baby, her first 'grandchild' and she absolutely adores him!

She's going to be a special person in his life for sure and I feel like she needs her own special name that isn't grandma as my partner feels that would be disrespectful to his Mum.

Gahh!!! Such an awkward situation but would appreciate your recommendations for cute names or if you've been in a similar situation, what did you do?!

I had step grandparents, as do my children. The step grandparent chose the title (Granny, Grandma etc) and then their Christian name wa saddled on the end, eg Granny Mary.

I think that the children will call her what they want to depending on how they feel. This isn't something that you can necessarily dictate.

Nana name

If his mum is Grandma then I'd go for Nanny or Nanna X for his SM.

My son calls his step-grandparents by their first names.
However, my son's children call my husband, their step-grandfather, Grandad.

I think you need to stay right out of this. If your partner doesn't want her referred to as Grandma, you need to respect that.

@CatCup

Nana name

Exactly. I'm Nana TurnStone to my stepson's 2 DGC ; it works perfectly.

Why would it be disrespectful to his mum for her to also be a granny/grandma? If he doesn’t want her to have a title that’s fine but that’s about his feelings not his mum’s.

My step mum is granny, my mum is grandma. SM was never a parent figure to me but we’ve made no distinction in titles. My mum is fine with it too, she’s very gracious, but it was entirely up to DH and me and SM has been around more than 20 years.

We just asked all four grandparents what they want to be called. Two chose first name (convention in their family), two chose nicknames which are a play on their name. One is a step grandparent but was in DP's life from young so was treated the same.

My parents split up when I was 36.
My mum is Nana.
My dad is Grandad.
Dad's partner (of about 8 years by now) is Granny Diana*
DH's dad is Abuelo (grandfather) cos he's Spanish! DH'sum is referred to as Abuela, although she sadly died when I was pregnant.

*Diana not her real name. She is also a DGM of 3 and treats my son like a bonus grandchild, it's lovely.

@AnotherEmma

I do think it makes a difference when the father and stepmother got together.

My dad and stepmum got married when I was in primary school, so she's been in my life since I was a young child and she's my third parent - I would never call her mum because I have a mum, but she is important to me. So it was a no brainer to me that she would be a grandmother to my children.

If my dad had met and married someone when I was already an adult and no longer spent time living with him, his new wife wouldn't be my stepmother, I would just refer to her as "dad's wife" not my stepmum, and she wouldn't be a grandmother to my children.

This is exactly what's happened in my family.

Dad married my stepmum when I was 10, she's Grandma or Granny and just 'name' to me.

Mum got together with now husband when I was 18. Treats me like a daughter but would never call me step daughter etc. So to my chn he's 'name'. Every so often someone accidentally calls him Grandad but it just doesn't feel right...