I know it's wrong but will these feelings go?

[GrilledGroop]

I know I'll be flamed by some but I was wondering if anyone has ever felt like this and if it went away?

Recently had first baby and ever since I just get so easily fed up of DSC. The thought of taking time away from my baby to do anything for them just really annoys me and I just prefer it tenfold when they aren't here.

I never really minded either way before but ever since DC I just feel like I'm starting to resent the situation.

I have never understood why cooking for 1,or 2more people, especially children, seems for some people to be such a chore. In our house, it always seems that there is food enough extra for 1 or 2 people and how much extra laundry do the children generate.?

I think that's because people assume a scenario where the SC are just going along with the system in place for these things. I don't think anyone would resist just making more of what they usually make food wise, resentment usually arises when the SC are fussy with food and make the process harder. Similarly, washing my SSs clothes wouldn't bother me, but he actually drops clothes and towels all around the house rather than putting them in any sort of pile, so it is irritating and it does make significantly more work for me.

@Tiredoftattler I don't think most people can afford to habitually buy food for 1 or 2 extra for each meal ....

When DPS children are hear we go from 2 to 4 people so it's pretty much double the food and it would be really wasteful to make that much when they aren't here. We also cook different things when they are here so we can all enjoy it and one of them is a pescetarian.

I have never understood why cooking for 1,or 2more people, especially children, seems for some people to be such a chore. In our house, it always seems that there is food enough extra for 1 or 2 people and how much extra laundry do the children generate.?

I have 3 stepchildren who are all fussy in their own ways and neither of them like the same thing, I cook 4 different meals, every mealtime.

As for extra laundry, two of my stepsons are still wetting the bed and wetting themselves through the day (1 is still in nappies but always soaks through) and I have 4 lots of bedding extra to wash every weekend as it always goes through duvets which equals 4 extra washes and that’s not even including their clothes, again I don’t mind but it is a chore and I would feel that it was a chore if they were my own children too 😂

@lorw you cook 4 meals???

@KylieKoKo Yup - two of my stepsons are autistic, they don’t all like the same thing and then I cook a different meal for me and DH cause we have a normal diet

It is easier when it’s party teas where’s I can do a buffet of a bit of everything and the kids can just eat what they want but obviously we don’t have parties every weekend 😂

[quote Lorw]@KylieKoKo Yup - two of my stepsons are autistic, they don’t all like the same thing and then I cook a different meal for me and DH cause we have a normal diet

It is easier when it’s party teas where’s I can do a buffet of a bit of everything and the kids can just eat what they want but obviously we don’t have parties every weekend 😂[/quote]
Wow. There's absolutely no way I'd cook 4 different meals, autistic or not! Why does their dad not help?

@aSofaNearYou

It’s much less stressful then trying to get them to eat all the same thing, literally they’d rather starve themselves - I used to make just one meal but by god it was screaming and crying and making themselves sick every meal time, never again.

A typical Sunday roast for example (which is one of the easiest meals I cook) - the eldest won’t eat any potato products at all and will only eat chicken or steak, YP and carrots/broccoli, the middle one eats roast potatoes and gammon (gammon/ham is the only meat he likes) but strictly no veg, and I do the youngest chicken nugs&chips (he has this every dinner time, won’t eat anything else) I can then do more exciting veg and bits for me and DH.

I do the cooking mostly as DH does other stuff in the house, it’s just how we divide it.

"I mean this happens with bio kids too. I have slightly less tolerance for dd1 now that dd2 has arrived. I def have less tolerance for the steps. Few reasons really, you’re tired, babies are very needy, kids often play up when there’s a new baby as a way of asserting themselves, kids look bigger and uglier suddenly next to cute baby, then of course there’s the all consuming love that you have for your own kids which I think for most people isn’t on the cards for steps. All normal. Just try and manage it best you can"

Yep this! Made me laugh out loud so true! My DS is nearly 11 months and the feelings like that are wearing off... It must be an instinctive thing as I didnt want anyone with me (including DS8 and DP) let alone the SKids !

I felt and tbh still feel this way. It totally changes when you have your own. Enjoy every minute with your little one, the SC arent your responsibility x