Hi all I’m new here. I am really struggling with how I’m feeling and just want some advice on how to deal with how I feel and how to change it. My husbands daughter has been placed with us by social services, due to accusations made by dsd of assault and neglect, she is 7 and all in all apart from some behavioural issues is a good kid. I have 3 kids of my own varying in age from 2 to 15 and I am really struggling. She’s been with us a month and as I only work part time and my partner works long hours the lions share of the care has fallen to me- school runs, after school care, tea time etc. She doesn’t see her mum so we have her 24/7 even when my children go to their biological dad, or she sees her grandparents and I’m feeling so resentful. I feel sorry for her but we’ve never been close as she’s had to hear her mother bad mouth me and her father for the last 3 years, I am feeling so selfish for how I feel and want to change my negative outlook which is why I’ve come on here. I feel miserable and tired out and fed up, I miss my family as it was and want it back- I know that sounds so selfish. I didn’t sign up for this and we chose not to have any more children for many reason financial, time constraints and the children we already had under our roof and now I feel like I’ve been given another child I didn’t ask for to bring up. I had so many plans with my own kids and can’t help but feel her living with us is spoiling those. She’s very full on, up at the catch of dawn and always full of energy and getting stuff out and leaving a mess, wanting attention and bickering with my younger two and telling tales even though they’re much younger. I am exhausted by it all and feel like my children are missing out as my time is now split between them and her. I am worried I won’t financsilly be able to do all I wanted for my children and they’ll miss out and I feel angry that I’m now bringing up someone else’s child because she’s incapable. I resent my husband and the fact we don’t have any time together, and I am absolutely dreading the summer holidays when normally I look forward to them. Has anyone been in this situation before? What do I do? How do I change how I feel? I honestly feel like taking the kids and leaving, being in my own without all the stress. We haven’t had the easiest of relationships from the start due to her mother and outside influences such as money snd court battles etc and thus just feels like yet another drama and more hassle. I am beginning to think we are cursed and worry the effect this and my mood is having on my own children 😢 please advise
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Step-parenting
stepdaughter now living with us and I’m struggling 😢
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Amygull3453 · 04/06/2019 22:36
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