Ex wife hell

[Sparklingraspberry1]

Anyone else have experience of horrific ex wives. I don't just meannthebusul run of the mill awkwardness. I mean down right nasty, ridiculous and ludicrous. I regularly find myself thinking "is she serious". I genuinely fear that she is mentally unstable due to the irrationality of her behaviour.

Controlling, manipulating and down right crazy. Constantly using kids as pawns.

She makes every effort to split me and DP up. Constantly texts him TELLING him what to do with the kids, asking about money making him pay for XYZ and will tell the kids if he refuses to (she gets more than enough CSA. We have kids regularly thanks to C/O and have to provide on those days too, obviously. Tells the kids far too much, she tells them everything that goes on. She tells them she hates me, that I'm stupid and that their daddy will never marry me (she's never met me) and tries to get kids to hate their dad (he's the most involved father I have ever met, not even being bias). The kids are 7 and 5, and thankfully, they adore me. She tried to get school involved to disallow me to pick up and drop off. Constantly sends kids in scruffy clothes, ripped or too small (she apparently has money, always on trips out etc.) Or if she picks kids from school will keep the uniform we have provided, meaning we have to buy full new uniform regularly.

At school, she's one of those mum's who is into everything and into everyone business. The one at school who can't help but stick her nose in. She believes she's everyone's friend and everyone likes her. As I'm an intelligent person, I am aware that others see through this. It's like she's constantly looking for validation from others.

My DP has been split from her for two and a half years and she's never moved on.

This is literally just a few things. Stuff has happened that I daren't even disclose! This is just the basics.

Anyone else have a similar experience?

If so, how do you cope?

I wish that I could have, if not an amicable and civil relationship with DSC's Mum, then at least some sort of indifference.

Unfortunately, there are some people who you just cannot reason with. It didn't matter how nice I was from the onset, she was determined that she wanted a row. About anything and everything conceivable. And she and DP had split up 9 years previously!

She speaks to DP like a piece of shit yet he takes it and jumps to her demands although he would never, ever be spoken to like that by anybody else and certainly not by me. She also spoke to me like a piece of shit after getting hold of my number. After trying to play the long game and kissing her arse for a year or so, I blocked her so I no longer have to live in anxiety of the next onslaught.

I would have a level of respect for her if she was an ok Mum but she's awful. However the kids are teenagers and extremely loyal so pointless forcing them to live here. They eat fast food all week, go to bed whenever they want, do zero homework, massive dental decay, nice clothes bought for them 'lost' within days never to be seen again, school attendance is shit. Gave her money for a DSC's residential trip and she spent it on herself (NOT maintenance, it was on top of that, before I get jumped on)

I am 'not allowed' to tell the DSC's off, 'not allowed' to have them on social media (despite paying their phone contracts personally), but I am 'allowed' to pick them up, drop them off, have them when their Disney dad is preoccupied and pay for stuff.

Two weeks before our holiday this year, DH received a call from the passport office saying that his ex had applied for new passports for the kids. They wanted to know if he still had them before cancelling them 😱 She knew we had them which means that she was prepared to sacrifice her own children’s holiday just to spite us. The Passport office have made a note that only DH can renew now.

My DH ex wanted to 'vet' me 3 years into our relationship as she wanted to discuss her child with me and essentially where I should stand etc and all it was, was a 'me,me,me' session and just slag off my partner to me for 2 hours whilst playing victim as a single parent! rolls eyes my mum was a single parent to two of us and never spouted sh*% like this woman - ever. Ever since she's just played silly manipulative games trying to control our household. The woman makes my skin crawl.

@lookatyourwatchnow - yep I'm the same. I'm not aloud to be 'motherly' or tell them off for house hold rules even but then if I step back I am unfair and I'm treat my DC differently
It's all very 'cake and eat it' . It is ok for me to cook, clean, do washing, be taxi, cash machine and so on, but I must tolerate rudeness and crap behaviour in what is my home.....