SMs - Would this seem weird to you?

[GracefulSwanPaddlingLegs]

Not a StepP but a RP so hope you don't mind me crashing but would appreciate your advice. DD1 is 11 and starting very obviously to develop. As great as ExP is with them he still sees her as 5 - Would it be totally weird to ask to chat with SM for 5 mins to ask her to be on hand for when the inevitable happens if it should be when she's there? I don't interfere with their times with kids, DD knows it going to come at some point but would rather die to say anything to her DF, would like to reassure her it's okay to go her and they'll have something in.

Graceful - how thoughtful of you. As a SM I would welcome my SD's mum calling me about that. We don't get on at all but there are some things that just need discussing and my SD would rather it was between her mum and I. I have things ready for her at home and I recently got a washbag ready with emergency supplies for her school-bag. SD seemed grateful and knows that she can always talk to me - I just wish her mum could see I want to help - not over-step.

I jumped ahead on this one and texted DSD's mum to say I had some towels put aside for her and she should tell DSD to come to me if and when she needed to.
I don't know if she has told DSD and DSD hasn't mentioned anything but I would hate for her to be embarrassed and DP is totally out of his depth and wants to believe she will stay a little girl forever.

Thanks all, I missed the chat with SM due to phone issues but luckily ex took it on board. She knows all about periods and that it will be coming at some point (house full of girls here) but if it comes on dad's weekend or if she should have accidents/leaks which we're all used to at some point I want her to feel comfortable

I think it is fine for step Mum to take this role if she wants to but to be honest, I don't understand why so many women think men can't talk to their daughters about periods or sex.

If there was no step mum, he would have to deal with it.

As a SM to many girls I would have loved communication about this, so I would say yes! My DH had felt a little uncomfortable for years about it and relieved to have something that I could handle. Also good to know when the tears/anger might start!

i wish my partners ExW was this comfortable with me! Im not SM yet (and was not the OW either!) but treat the kids as if i am and with a 10yo girl i know the inevitable is coming and i dont think partner will deal with it too well! We do have a very close relationship and i feel i could discuss with my SD but would worry Exw would see it as treading on her toes and it would cause unnecessary agro.
Id be happy if ExW was comfortable enough to do this with me and would be so much better for the kids too, id definitely say go for it!