Any advice welcome about this problem please, summed up in thread title: I overheard my 11 yo DSS saying to my 4 yo DD "Look at my penis", whilst lying on her bed. Being just outside the bedroom door I walked in, and in rather a state of shock told them to go and play downstairs, to diffuse/break-up the situation. Unsure what to do, and still in shock, I only mentioned it to DH once DSS has gone back to his mums. In hindsight I should have brough this up at the time, with DSS, that what was said was not appropriate. During the same visit DSS was holding DD on his knee, bouncing her up and down, then when she got off his knee rubbing his crotch area. I should add DSS's visits have been sporadic due to bad relations between my DH and DSM since separation 8 years ago.. not helped by living in different countries. DSM has told DSS that DD and DS (3) are 'fake' brothers and sisters, which also no doubt colours how he views them. Even after 8 years she refuses to meet me, and has never met my kids. My current strategy has been to insist I am always there whenever all kids are together, but in reality is unrealistic. Also I'm not supported by my DH, who would like to be able to spend time with all his kids without me 'policing'. He says I'm hugely overreacting, and even doubts such a thing could ever happen, "you are branding my son a pedophile, demonising him, when he is only a child. This is your problem, not his.. etc.". This leaves me feeling very unsupported. I have no family, and have been through therapy dealing with my own child abuse issues, which adds to my sense of isolation in handling this situation. When I've discussed with situation with friends the consensus also seems to be that it's just children being children, and not to take it too seriously. Advice please!