Hi all
OK, I have an issue that will require an open mind. Parts of this story, whilst I am not ashamed, will not sit well with possibly more conservative people and I respect that there will be differing perspectives and experiences. This is what I am looking for, I just ask that it is kept on topic and not a witch hunt because of my life choices.
OK so last year I met and fell in love with a great guy. He had two kids and had been separated 18 months from their mum. All was going great, we waited several months before I met the kids, and to begin with it was an hour at a time with lots of family around, building up the time I was there very slowly. I spent ages researching how to conduct myself with them, and with BF, so as to make them as comfortable with their dad's new friend as possible. It went really well and we were all getting on great.
The EXW then decided I was not a fit influence around them because one of the kids came back from a weekend saying she did not like me, which kids do, and bear in mind this was an isolated incident. We hadn't argued, I hadn't disciplined (I never did, that was BF's job) But the ex decided I was not allowed to spend any time with the kids until she said otherwise, and BF was so petrified she would stop him seeing them he agreed.
About 2 months after that, we ended. A large part of the reason was she was putting him in the impossible position of feeling like he had to choose, because now that EXW did not like me, it was a threat to his access. We had only been together about 7 months so I was the easy tie to cut.
So I have been getting on with my life. Me and EXBF speak occasionally but are not in each other's lives. I certainly have no contact with the kids, and haven't since well before we split up.
Anyway, the bit some people might frown on, but again, my choice. I have had an interest in photography but am very amateur. I love nude portraits, body positivity studies (a bit like the one Leonard Nimoy did) but don't have any subjects. So I started taking nudes of myself, as artful as I could make them with limited experience, and started an faceless blog. Within this blog I also feature other people doing body positivity stuff as well as some personal posts of my own, like a sort of dear diary if I am having a low day.
The EXW has somehow magically found it (DO NOT ask me how, she doesn't work and seems to have a lot of time on her hands) and has screenshotted it all, texted my EXBF to say she is going to present it in court as evidence he associates with unsavoury people (I earn £35k plus a year, having worked my way up since 18, haven't ever had more than a parking ticket, own my own home which I earned bought and paid for, am tee total and never do or have done drugs, come from a good family, but yeah, I am the scum of the earth).
I am in several minds as to what to do about the blog - delete it or not? I've put a lot of time, thought and effort into it, it's been a personal project that has kept me busy whilst getting over a break up from the love of my life. On the one hand, it would be unfair for my EXBF to lose access to his kids because of what I am doing now. But on the other hand, why should I continue to have my life run by this woman when I am not in any way part of her or her children's lives? She succeeded in running me out, why should I base any of my life choices, good or bad, around her?
I just wondered what the legal standpoint on this is really - is it actually admissable in court what a girlfriend or ex girlfriend does with their free time (as long as it is legal of course)? Any advice at all?