I will keep this brief with bullet points, but don't really know how to handle any of the points succinctly.
Step kids, 18 and 16 haved lived with us for 1.5 years FT
I have found it the worse time of my life as I/we dont have kids of our own
We argue like crazy about once a week, especially now since they are doing or have completed exams, which means they are at home more
Tonight they take 2.5 hours to cook a meal which was simple, and we thought they would have eaten by the time we had walked the dogs but no, we are still waiting for them to clear the kitchen by 8.30pm
Some of the bits we wanted to eat apparently had been eaten by step son in the week
I said to DH this is not acceptable as I can not check contents of freezer every day, and perhaps kids should advise us of low reserves on whiteboard on fridge, where I write the shopping list.
DH becomes defensive and says I am taking out my frustration on him, saying it is always his fault when the kids don't do something right.
I told him to be more authoritive and a little bit more stern towards them rather than being their friend and pissing me off.
Massive argument pursues. More to come, but I tried to keep it brief and didn't manage!