Aggression with kids?

[notthegirlnextdoor]

Any of you had any issues with it?

DSS11, I have DD 5&3. DSS bigger than average 11YO, 5YO was prem so isn't much bigger than 3YO.

Don't want to go into much detail, but we've had some horrid incidents just recently with DSS attacking the younger ones when we are out of the room. I'm talking, kicked 5YO in the throat, bent her fingers back, smacked 3YO round the back of the head.

The last month I haven't wanted to leave them alone together in a room because the girls always come running out crying and somehow DSS manages to convince DH that the girls "deserved it."

I know they can be a handful, loud, etc, but the latest things to me, have been done on purpose, designed to hurt. DH sticking head in the sand.

The last incident (bending fingers back - I'd been out of the room for 30 seconds when it happened, snarling at the girls) caused a huge row between DH and I due to his point blank refusal to discipline his child.

We have all 3 of them next weekend and I feel really nervous about it.

Bad behaviour

I agree Frog, it isn't the OPs concern but removing her dc when he is there is not solving anything. Why should they be booted out of their home because nobody will tell this kid off for being violent? The girls will end up feeling pushed out of their own family by a boy who hits them and that is not right.
I agree with Random. Your DH needs telling that this is not acceptable and he should deal with it sooner rather than later.

This is why I insisted that if p wasn't going to parent his son properly then they should go to a hotel for contact (I'm sure he would have found somewhere else to stay) because I didn't want my kids feeling unsafe or being hurt in their own home.
Unfortunately I agreed one last time to give the benefit of the doubt to ss and look what happened
Op you will get plenty of support and advice here re how to approach and discuss it - aim to have no dc there because it's not nice for them to hear

Ps my 16 yo finds my 5 yo very annoying indeed but he doesn't harm him, sometimes rough play gets a bit out of hand an I step in straight away, but there is no sneaky hurting - make sure you encourage your dd's to always tell you if they're frightened or hurt and tbh I'd discuss safe/unsafe good and bad touching with them too around now - as a preventative measure x

No way would he be allowed in my house if he behaved like that! I banned my step son from my house because he was being aggressive with my son and my son was becoming increasingly scared and withdrawn. Why the hell should children live in fear when you can stop it. Your husband will have to make other arrangements away from the house to see his son before this boy does something you will all regret.