Swimming rant - was I in the wrong here?

[clary]

Arrgh need to vent
Had a lovely swim today but there was an annoying man. I swim there often and I have seen this man before. He swims in the medium lane (lanes are 2 x slow, 1 x med, 2 x fast) doing a very splashy but inefficient front crawl, slowly. I am a diehard medium lane swimmer – front crawl but not very fast.

I have no issue with people swimming in the lane at a different speed. But when they don’t move over it really bugs me. I left him a length to get ahead but still caught up with him within about 5 lengths. He MUST have seen me but didn’t move. I tapped his feet (ugh) and he still didn’t move. It took him four lengths to stop and let me go first.

Then the exact same thing happened again. Then again. The third time, I overtook him (we were the only ppl in the lane) as I was getting annoyed. I had finished my swim so I stopped at the end to say something to him, as he does this all the time and the older I get, the more I want to call out crap behaviour.

I politely said to him, can you try to be more aware of others in the lane and how fast they are going – you should stop and let them pass. He pretended not to understand, so I repeated it, then he unpleasantly said, speak to the lifeguard and see what they say; you were too impatient to wait for me to stop [wtf?] so it’s your fault. And he swam off.

He's massively out of order, no? If you are in a lane you need to be aware of other swimmers – it’s not hard. If I am in a faster lane (occasionally) I am hyper aware of the fast ppl and get out of their way, every other length if need be. Plus wait for him to stop? He was finishing his length and then immediately setting off again even tho I was right behind him – how can I wait for him?

Lucky you @elozabet if you've not living with the physical side effects of repeated childhood trauma. Of course I know you're not fondling other people's feet, don't be so ridiculous. But you obviously have no idea about the long term effects of trauma or how sensitive a place the soles of the feet are to touch.

Your empathy bypass is quite something to behold.

Yes it is a general session open to anyone, but it is all lane swimming (early in the morning).

Why am I being unreasonable expecting a swimmer to follow the rules of lane swimming at that pool? Genuinely curious. Or do you mean speaking to him about it? In which case I am happy to accept that I am becoming a Grumpy Old Woman.

@clary it's so annoying

Tonight I was in the medium lane - there's a fast and medium. As the the other 3 lanes causal m.

The fast lane is far too fast but I'm probably medium speed in the medium lane a moderate slow crawl rather than a sedate breaststroke. I do 1 to 2km at a steady pace.

I'm always acutely aware of who is in my lane. If I catch up I rest and give them a length or two head start. If I'm bought up I let them over take.

But tonight there was this guy who is slower than me. He goes regularly and does this regularly. No problem let's just give each other space. He need to stop every 25m fine. But yes you guessed he always set off just as start to turn and with. In 5 strokes I'm doing a limp breast stroke. Complete arrogance and lack of self awareness.

Worse still was the time I went to overtake someone at the end of the lane. Which I believe to be standard etiquette. He was doing a leisure my breaststroke with his wife. There are two lanes for lane swimming and the rest of the pool is casual swim. He must have known I was behind him and much much faster as inane to over take and turn to the left. He grabbed me! And pulled me under! At the other end I asked he was ok and he started yelling at me about how rude I was and I should ask if I want to over take and think in own the place. He skulked off to the casual side. 5My husband was there and told me to report him. So I did -he'd left by the time they could do anything but I was livid for days.

And yes foot tapping is standard in comps but I've never been tappped in a pool lane. But I'd know weeks tit many of I did. Can you over take at the end? It really hard if they are just a bit faster.

Keep on swimming!

@hopefulnothelpful

It's not your pool. Stop making up rules.

the pool has rules, this twat just needs to follow them or if not, other swimmers need to report him.

you can't have everyone making up their own rules.

@clary

theres enough chemical in the water to make tapping his foot not too bad. Do this near the end of a lane & if he doesn't stop at the end do it again in the next lane... if he still doesn't give way, report him to the LG.

@overgrowntoddler that is a shocking story. I really really don't understand what goes on in their heads. I think a lot of people don't see swimming as a form of exercise. They see it as something else but I don't quite know what.

I have a disability so swimming is really the only exercise I get that makes a difference but it is so hard to maintain. If you are not dealing with people who are clueless about lane etiquette you are dealing with the swimming pool offering less and less time for lane swimming.

The other day on my pool there were three big lanes for lane swimming - slow, medium and fast. A woman thought it was reasonable to do aqua aerobics in the middle of the slow lane forcing people to swim around her. She had equipment and everything.

They might not jump on your treadmill but BOY do men like to lounge around on gym equipment instead of doing their reps efficiently and freeing it up for somebody else (me!) to use. I swear they are there to hang out more than they are to work out.

I'm telling you, it's men, it's always sodding entitled men.

Yes 90% of those in the pool just to socialise, bob about, soak and some do a few lengths one a month. I go 3-5 times a week.

Some pools rename the "lane" session as "swimming for fitness" which i think is much better.

Our lane rules are a sheet of. A4 stick to a board at the end. They should be bigger and clearer.

I wish the lifeguards would enforce the rules without being asked- it's embarrassing. I've had kids swimming the wrong way, playing with the rope and I caught it with my arm, and adult "doggy paddlers" in the lanes when the rest of the pool is relatively empty.

In fact I feel a suggestion box moment coming on!

If it's not possible to overtake then he was definitely in the wrong.

I've never heard of toe tapping, you'd probably get into a fight attempting that where I am.

I do agree it's always the men, splashing about like whales, disrupting all the water and often not even going that fast since brute strength is not the same thing as perfecting your stroke.

I seek out the quietest times to swim. Someone else on here called it a 'millionaire's swim', when you manage to get the pool to yourself.

Your pool sounds stressful. I would've moved to the slow/fast lane to get away from him

I hate foot tappers but overtaking is possible where I swim.

just double back. I know you have to do this more than once if he's a lot slower but slow shit swimers clogging lanes is a fact of life. Otherwise I just move to the fast lane and stop for others faster than I.

https://www.prescription-swimming-goggles.co.uk/swimming-goggles

Op, slightly off topic, but you mentioned your eyesight. My sister bought from this website and is happy with the difference it makes.

And for what’s it’s worth, I think he was unreasonable.

I don't understand why you can't overtake, unless there's someone swimming at you? That's what everyone does in the pool I use.

As I have said, overtaking is explicitly banned on the A4 sheet at the end of the lane telling you lane etiquette. The lanes are not wide enough for three swimmers 9one going, one coming and one overtaking).

I swim front crawl, so even if I did wear scrip goggles, I would not, once swimming, be able to see someone coming towards me (if you swim crawl you’ll know what I mean). So even if the lane was clear when I started overtaking, someone might get in and swim up to me. Unlikely I know but I have cannoned into people too many times (when they are doing the “take a side each” manoeuvre and it wasn’t obvious to me) to want to risk it really.

I actually did overtake in the end but wasn’t comfortable.

Was thinking of this thread during my swim this morning. Has anyone ever said to the person who is in the wrong lane - hey, I think you would be better off in the slower lane.

I have been told a couple of times I should move to the faster lane and it was done nicely so I didn't mind. I like to swim backstroke slowly followed by a fast crawl at the end of my session and so the slower lane is better I think. People suggesting I move probably only notice the faster crawl.

I just wonder if it might be a way of raising their awareness of lanes as I sometimes wonder if they even know there are different speed lanes. I suspect it would still result in tension but if done nicely it might work.

Has anyone ever said to the person who is in the wrong lane - hey, I think you would be better off in the slower lane

Yep, when I was 15, a county swimmer, and unaware of how aggressive men get at being shown up by women, I suggested a man who was in the fast lane (not medium) who had joined the lane after me and who was attempting front crawl but couldn’t actually do it, so kept stopping and putting his feet down to breathe, could move down a lane.

I was called a “fat ugly little cunt” for my trouble (I was about 7.5st, so not fat).

@Saschka I was afraid people would share stories like yours. I guess that's why I haven't done it.

Swim update: went at lunchtime today - just two lanes, one fast, one slow. You’ll be glad to hear I went in the fast lane! One breaststroke woman, faster than she looked, one slow non-splashy crawl man, a lot faster than he looked. I had to stop for him about 7 times in my half-mile swim, which made it a bit bitty, but fine. Nowhere else for either of us to swim. All good.

To those saying “find a better time to swim” btw, I am very limited due to various factors (dropping DD to work most days, weekend commitments, not many useful evening sessions at the pool). It’s cheap tho (£18 pm) so I can’t really complain (and in fact I am not complaining about that).

Edited to add @Saschka sorry to hear your story, that is horrible.

Also had some good swimming karma today.

missed the morning session due to queueing for oasis tickets to be kicked out at the end

Was in the medium lane with another guy who was amazing doing some long distance I reckon (I think it's the 5k guy) but really fast. There were 3 in the fast lane.

There rest of the pool emptied from all but three people. So I moved over and did some breast stoke.

I paused at the deep end to ponder why my stroke was so awful and the man stopped and said "you didn't move cause of me did you" you know it's ok we can share the lane"

It was so nice.

I said it's empty it fine I'm doing breaststroke enjoy you millionaire swim!

He was so nice

Yup!

Seems odd to me not to be able to overtake if it's clear!

OP has explained why it's difficult to overtake when you are in a narrow lane and swimming crawl. The explanation seems logical to me.