Swimming rant - was I in the wrong here?

[clary]

Arrgh need to vent
Had a lovely swim today but there was an annoying man. I swim there often and I have seen this man before. He swims in the medium lane (lanes are 2 x slow, 1 x med, 2 x fast) doing a very splashy but inefficient front crawl, slowly. I am a diehard medium lane swimmer – front crawl but not very fast.

I have no issue with people swimming in the lane at a different speed. But when they don’t move over it really bugs me. I left him a length to get ahead but still caught up with him within about 5 lengths. He MUST have seen me but didn’t move. I tapped his feet (ugh) and he still didn’t move. It took him four lengths to stop and let me go first.

Then the exact same thing happened again. Then again. The third time, I overtook him (we were the only ppl in the lane) as I was getting annoyed. I had finished my swim so I stopped at the end to say something to him, as he does this all the time and the older I get, the more I want to call out crap behaviour.

I politely said to him, can you try to be more aware of others in the lane and how fast they are going – you should stop and let them pass. He pretended not to understand, so I repeated it, then he unpleasantly said, speak to the lifeguard and see what they say; you were too impatient to wait for me to stop [wtf?] so it’s your fault. And he swam off.

He's massively out of order, no? If you are in a lane you need to be aware of other swimmers – it’s not hard. If I am in a faster lane (occasionally) I am hyper aware of the fast ppl and get out of their way, every other length if need be. Plus wait for him to stop? He was finishing his length and then immediately setting off again even tho I was right behind him – how can I wait for him?

Nope. What happens in 'every pool' clearly isn't what's supposed to happen on this one.
The instructions on the end of the lane ask slower swimmers to stop at the end to let others pass. You can’t overtake as a rule as there isn’t room. ^

I’m afraid I think you were 100% in the wrong and he wasn’t rude to you

As I said I'd probably pause once to show willing, but there is no real need to when there is a clear lane to overtake. And as others have said, the faster swimmer has the other option to turn early too. I don't see an issue at all, and certainly not one I'd 'have words about'.

I agree with @OneFastDuck. Just turn early so you are in front of him. I find it saves me getting cross and also pisses off men who think they can dictate how fast a woman can swim.

If you were the only two in the lane then you could have suggested you both pick a side until someone else gets in.

I get very annoyed with slow swimmers who are not at all bothered they are holding people up but if someone behind me purposefully tapped my feet whileI was swimming I would think them very rude and less inclined to get out their way. Very petty but you just don't touch other swimmers.

Or as they get to the end of the lane you turn mid-lane so are ahead.

YANBU

He should have waited at the end of the lane for you to push off again first. If you were swimming at his feet this would hardly be an inconvenience for him.

In my experience this situation happens quite a lot with older, male swimmers. They appear to be completely oblivious to their surroundings.

The following is taken from the Everyone Active website on a page about lane swimming etiquette:

Let Faster Swimmers Past
If there’s a faster swimmer behind you, then it’s really important you let them past. Not only is it less than polite to keep faster swimmers behind you, but it can cause a tailback behind you, clogging up the lane for other swimmers. If you want to let swimmers past, wait until you reach the end of the line, pull to the side and let all the faster swimmers behind past before continuing to swim.
It’s also really important you also don’t start swimming in front of faster swimmers, let them all past before you begin. If you are being regularly passed, then you might want to consider moving into a slower lane.

I have never heard of the tapping feet thing and think that is a gross invasion of someone’s personal space.

I think if a faster swimmer were right behind me, I’d pause at the wall to let them carry on ahead. But if they are so fast that they keep lapping me, I’d get annoyed and wonder why they were not in a faster lane. Especially if I were there first. If they were in the pool first, then I would move to a slow lane if they were fast enough to keep lapping me.

There isn’t a set speed for the different lanes, it is always relative. So often a steady medium swimmer should consider one of the 2 fast lanes if swimmers already in the medium lane are going slower.

I think that because he was swimming there first, you know how much slower he is than you and you overtook him 3 times in one workout and would have overtook him more if you hadnt been hanging back, tapping feet that you should have gone into one of the fast lanes from the start.

I’m completely with you OP. I’m very much average middle lane swimming speed, and there seems to be many (normally middle aged or older) men who are oblivious to the fact they’re swimming slow lane rather than middle lane speed. My theory is that they were once middle lane speed but refuse to accept they’re not as fast as they used to be. Especially when it’s a woman overtaking them every couple of lengths.

My favourite is when they speed up so you can’t overtake them but then they can only manage to keep up the fast pace for more than a few lengths, and they then have to stop at the end panting while I finally overtake!

To answer some points:

I don’t do “pick a side” as I swim without lenses in so I can’t always see when someone gets in. When I have done the pick a side, I have had people bash into me. It’s not always obvious that ppl are doing it. So I don’t do it any more.

As I said, overtaking is specifically banned. Swimmers are asked to stop at the end. If you overtake you risk crashing into another swimmer - it was the start of the session and I would expect more swimmers to get in.

Also from the Everyone Active website:

How to let Slower Swimmers Know you want to Pass
If you’re being held up by a slightly slower swimmer in front of you, then the commonly accepted thing to do is to give their feet a little tap. Remember, not all swimmers will be able to sense your presence, and may not even feel a tap, so be patient. If they’re following this guide, they’ll pull aside at the end of the lane and let you past.

I have never heard of the tapping feet thing and think that is a gross invasion of someone’s personal space.

I agree. Also I doubt I have the fine motor skills needed to tap someone’s foot while we are both swimming.

Generally speaking, faster swimmers have right of way.

Interesting that some think it’s fine. What would you do then if that’s you - just swim really slowly? Or wait at the end till he was loads ahead - but why should I?

Remember you’re not supposed to overtake in this pool.

Maybr I need to turn early. Annoying tho as I swim xxx lengths.

I don’t usually tap feet btw as I think it’s gross (see my op) but the first time, it was by accident as I caught him up )front crawl you see).

I can imagine the outrage on here of it had been a man tapping a woman's feet to alert her attention, on what sounds like more than one occasion.

@clary As several of us have said if you really cannot overtake even with a clear lane then yes turn early (I often do). It means everyone can keep swimming. If you are counting lengths, add on a couple at the end to make up for it.

If I showed up and saw a swimmer I was familiar with such that I know they are usually quite a bit slower than me, I would go into the next faster lane. I would know trying to share a lane with them would not work.

I hate hate being tapped on the feet. It's really invasive. Uninvited physical contact is so unpleasant. Even an accidental knock in the pool jars and stays with me for the rest of my session. Tbh if someone tapped my foot I'd probably deliberately keep swimming slowly to annoy them!
Slightly missed the point I know, but please don't foot tap unless you're in a club swimming session. It's not OK in public lane swimming.

Maybr I need to turn early. Annoying tho as I swim xxx lengths.

This is what I do, make a u-turn when I’ve caught up to someone. Unfortunately in our pool, the majority of the day the pool is split in half, with half being a free-for-all with playing kids and adults, and the other half is split into medium and fast. As there is no dedicated slow lane, that means anyone who wants to do laps but is not fast goes into the medium lane. Many times we have people who are very slow, such that I would need to slowly doggy paddle behind not to catch up to them. It’s a bit frustrating but what can you do. I guess base it off of time rather than laps?

Ah yes, as the woman swam slowly in the medium speed lane, ignoring the medium speed man behind her except also making sure she didn’t stop to let him pass at the ends. Men have killed women for far far less, you can’t just gender swap one tiny fraction of the interaction.

@readingmakesmehappy

Except as posted above. It is EXACTLY what Everyone Active (one of the biggest, if not the biggest group of swimming pools) tells you to do.

you might not like it, but you're wrong to say it shouldn't be done in public lane swimming.

I mean, he is definitely in the wrong and should ideally have gone to one of the slow lanes, failing that, he should have waited given the instructions specifically state to.
Given he didn't, I would have turned early. I would be more inclined to raise with pool staff than the man himself.

Could you ask at the pool at the possibility of having 2 medium lanes if they are regularly crowded?

This seems to be a thing some posters enjoy doing, I’ve noticed it on a lot of threads. ‘Imagine if this were a man!’. Why should we do that rather than address the actual situation.

I've never come across this and it would freak me out if somebody started tapping my feet 😅- though thanks to you I now know what it means. As a slow swimmer in a double lane at usually quiet times who tends towards giving way it hasn't come up.

I knew this post was going to be about a middle lane male swimmer. There is a definite type, they're always male, and they always have dreadful technique that I wish they'd correct. They're splashy as fuck and annoying as fuck, and they prioritise themselves over everybody else entirely. They are the only people I consistently have a problem with in the pool - and I don't even use the middle lane, I'm firmly over in slow!

The slowest person in the lane is the pace setter. You are being unreasonable!