Do you have questions about supporting your child’s mental health?

[BellaMumsnet]

Mental health can be a significant concern for parents when it comes to their child's wellbeing. Whether it's dealing with anxiety, depression, behavioural issues, or developmental disorders, it's important to address these concerns early on. Bupa's expert GP Zoe Williams, is here to answer any questions you might have about supporting your child's mental health and ensuring their happiness and overall wellbeing.

• Everyone who shares a question on the thread below will be entered into a prize draw.
• One Mumsnet user will win a £200 voucher.
• Zoe will be back online in a few weeks to answer a selection of your questions.

About the expert: DR Zoe Williams MBBS, DRCOG, MRCGP graduated from medical school in 2007. She has gained experience in many specialist fields within medicine and currently practices as an NHS General Practitioner in London and outside of the surgery is a National Advisor of Office for Health Improvement and Disparities and has served as a clinical advisor to the RCGP. Zoe is one of the resident Doctors on ITV’s This Morning, and has featured as an expert on the BBC’s The One Show, Horizon and Trust Me I’m a Doctor.

Here’s what Bupa has to say:
"Bupa's purpose is helping people live longer, healthier, happier lives and making a better world. We do this by providing a broad range of healthcare services, support and advice to people throughout their lives. In the UK Bupa are leading healthcare specialists. People are at the heart of everything we do. Together, we make health happen."

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!
MNHQ

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Do you think that helicopter parenting has a something to do with increases in anxiety - we do everything for our DC's - unlike when I was young - we played outdoors - walked to school with friends, went to the shops, went on the bus with friends - nowadays we taxi them around - want to know where they are all of the time - and playing out on the street seems like a bygone era ...
I am in my 40s and it's a totally different childhood from mine - not as carefree - and NO social media.

Anxious DS 11 had mysterious stomach pains for two years. They disappeared and in their place, throbbing eye pain and vomiting every month or so (suspect migraine). It's difficult to know if the anxiety is causing the symptoms or the symptoms are causing the anxiety. What would you recommend in this scenario?

Any tips for promoting good self esteem and realistic expectations (instead of perfectionism)?

My son had baby trichotillomania ages 1.5- 7 years. It seemed to be habitual largely but there were peaks of it at stressful times (start of term, new teacher etc). His tutor now believes he is neurodiverse (although we’d need to get him tested to understand exactly which type of neurodiversity it is). Could there be a link between the tricholomania and the neurodiversity?

If you had to pick your top 2 - what are the 2 things you’d recommend we do as a family to support everyone’s mental well-being?

My DH's dad, took his own life - many years ago- he does not really remember him, I worry that depression and poor MH can be hereditary (DH had minor OCD and ASD tendencies but nothing that really worries me (or him we have spoken about it. Is depression something which we are more predisposed to

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This is not the way to go -Mumsnet is being hijacked

There is an awful lot of messaging around mental health at the moment which seems to encourage the 'worried well' to seek help - by which I mean people with what you might call 'socially acceptable' forms of mental distress. Anxiety, stress, depression at a level that is caused not by intrinsic illness but by the difficult life circumstances in which many of us live. The kind of mental illness that doesn't make other people feel uncomfortable or threatened.

People with desperately severe mental illness - psychosis, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder - are often left out of this messaging. It's not quite nice to talk about them, and companies can't quite get the marketing lift that they are seeking by supporting people like this.

What can we all do to bring these people to the centre of our care and compassion? What can parents do to be more ready for the possibility that their adolescent child might develop psychosis? One in a hundred. One in three classrooms. That is a conservative estimate of the number of people affected. We should be as prepared for psychosis as we are for autism.

How can we improve parental understanding of the less well-known features of psychosis - the prodrome, the negative symptoms, the quiet, quiet fear?

Do you think the social media platforms should be monitored more - I think 16 is old enough to go on them - (although not realistic I know) too much cyber bullying, inappropriate role models and content - putting pressure on our children - I was a much happier child without instrgram and the world of perfection and filters -

I read that if your child sings when alone, it’s a sign of happiness? We spend so much time looking out for things to be concerned about but what are the things that can reassure us that they are fine?

How do I help my childs anxiety about going to bed alone. She is nearly 9 and
I have to lay with her every night which I dont mind but would love her not to be scared without me and not sure if its normal or not

How can I build confidence and self esteem in my DC?
I think increases in both would improve their mental health.
Thanks.

How does the government's 'Behaviour hub' ally with supporting children's mental health in their educational environment?

What are your tips for supporting a child through their teenage years?

Do you think our children's use of social media, poor sleep patterns ( I can remember my carefree childhood - no internet and 10 - 12 hours deep sleep every night) is a massive issue for our child's mental health being so poor - the 'genie is out of the bottle' with regard to the internet - how would you advise a drastic reduction in screentime ?

How can I get my child to open up about his feelings - I know he has been affected with a low mood and is always saying 'what's the point ?' when we talk about his future.
A third party, a neutral location or school ?
so many children have poor mental health - childhood is not the same anymore

How would you explain grief and losing a grandparent to a 6 year old - in a way the trauma is lessened and does not lead to anxiety and the death of a parent ?

Do you think a child having a pet makes a difference to their mental wellbeing - we are thinking of getting a dog to help our DS engage with another creature, go outdoors, and have someone to love other than parents - or would the responsibility be overwhelming ? (DS 7)

What are you thoughts on the waiting lists for an assessment and CAHMS services being squeezed to the point of extinction - if you cannot afford private - how do we help our children cope with post covid /
exam stress / consequences of bullying / self harm ???

My DD already has issues with her body image, (she's primary age) wants to diet, says she's fat and ugly, (she is neither) - I cannot convince her otherwise - what advice would you give her to improve her self esteem (other than telling her every day she is beautiful) - I am afraid she will become the victim of bullies in senior school if i don't sort this - picking on someone with low self esteem is just something a bully would thrive on

My son has become a real perfectionist and a very sore loser. He keeps saying I’m not good enough..’ and quits playing football with his friend or doing his homework etc. It doesn’t matter how many goals she scored before or how many answers he got right on his test if it’s not 100% he gets very upset angry and frustrated. How do we support him to have a better mindset and attitude towards learning new things?

Any tips for my younger son and helping his mental health - my eldest DS has autism - with violent episodes and meltdowns, I want to ensure the MH of my youngest is not overly affected long term - he tries to understand the disability but I worry for his emotional growth

Whats The best way to support a teen during exam times, when they are likely to be more anxious and less communicative?

My question is: What sort of age might OCD present?

Also, we read and see a lot about general anxiety in the sense that children and young adults are anxious about exams, driving tests, new jobs, meeting new people and doing presentations at school and uni. These are just a few examples.

Should we try and normalise this and say that yes sometimes tests and new situations can create anxiety and that this emotion is perfectly normal for most people. I’m not talking about irrational fears, phobias and intrusive thoughts, but the general ups and downs of life.

I currently have teenagers and much older children(30s)and I can see the difference in resilience between them. In once sense it’s good that they are confident and open now to talk about mental health, but on the other hand the normal up and downs of life experiences seem to be described as, or pathologolized as, a form of mental illness somehow. I wonder too, as a previous OP in the thread, whether the constant assault on the senses through 24/7 media and consequent disrupted sleep has contributed to this general anxiety.

Before people become defensive, I’m not trying to diminish people’s lived experience. It’s just something I have noticed and wondered about in my own family and wider connections. I have schizophrenia within my immediate family and have lost a sibling to suicide through this awful illness, so maybe my view on it is coloured by that.

I agree with PP that children’s services for mental health is woeful.