Do you have questions about the fourth trimester? MAM’s experts are here to answer your questions

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Created for MAM

Whether you’re a first time parent or have had a baby before, each pregnancy is different physically and emotionally. Whatever your question about the fourth trimester is, MAM’s experts - Zoe, Claire and Naomi are here to answer your questions.

• Everyone who shares a question on the thread below by the 6th October will be entered into a prize draw.
• One lucky user will win a £200 Amazon voucher.
• MAM’s experts will be back online in a couple of weeks to answer a selection of your questions.

About Midwife Zoe Watson: Zoe is a Registered Nurse and Midwife with over ten years of experience working in the NHS caring for patients and their families. Zoe qualified as a Midwife in 2012 and has since worked in various settings, from a specialist home birth team to a high-risk delivery suite, and most recently at a community birth centre.

About Health Visitor Claire Crips:
A dual-qualified nurse, midwife & health visitor with three beautiful children of her own. Currently working as a health visitor, Claire loves working with families.
Supporting them and their babies through the good and the hard times.

About Consultant Naomi Saunders:
Naomi Saunders, mum of two, infant massage consultant and primary school teacher, Naomi has since become an advocate of Combination Feeding and works with MAM to raise awareness of parents right to choose their own path when it comes to feeding.

Here’s what MAM has to say:
“Here at MAM we believe in supporting every mum on their feeding journey whichever journey they choose. We want mums to join us in supporting each other, MAM has a solution to help parents feel confident and babies feel good.”

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!
MNHQ

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Omg i am so sorry! Im new to mn so I have no idea what im doing. So sorry to have jumped in on this thread! 🙊 x

My children are 7 & 10 but I still have diastasis recti. Should I do anything about it?

is the 4th trimester a thing?I’ve heard differently from all sides.and if it is why isn’t it official and supported.
How should you balance it.should you cook,clean and get stuff done when the baby is quiet.or should you sleep?

Any tips on making the fourth trimester easier with a newborn whilst having a clingy small toddler lol?

How to best support newborn twins in the fourth trimester? When you also have a 2 year old. Feel pulled in many directions.

Is it normal to feel a bit "Deflated" in the 4th Trimester?

I don't mean like down or depressed etc, well maybe a little.
More like.. you were expecting Pizza and Chips from Dominoes for tea but instead you got a Potnoodle and 3 rounds of bread and butter.

I think I'd built up so much in my head that there was no way reality would meet expectations. Iyswim.

Do you have any tips on making the fourth trimester an easier transition? Are slings good to encourage bonding and does skin to skin daily help baby adjust to the outside world? It’s all changed since I had my eldest, I’d never heard of the 4th trimester back then! Thank you in advance

Are there any tips for establishing breast feeding and who to go to for support regarding latching on? My first baby just wouldn't latch and neither community midwife nor health visitor felt it was their remit to help. I ended up pumping for 1 month then switched to formula as my supply wasn't enough.

In hindsight I should have stayed on the postnatal ward for longer but I was so desperate to get home and found some of the patients in the bay I was in very noisy, disruptive and rude. Sorry if that sounds judgemental but honestly these 2 women would shout when someone else's baby cried to shut it up...

Anyway, I'm 28 weeks pregnant with my 2nd and would like to avoid switching to formula so soon this time and tips on persevering whilst also looking after another child would be greatly received 🤞

Do you recommend going back to work before the 4th trimester is over? I couldn't have done when my kids were babies, but my friend, who is pregnant with her first, is adamant she is going back to work after two weeks. I've tried to explain how weird my body felt, how my mood was all over the place, how tired I was, and how exhausted my body was from bleeding and producing milk but she isn't listening. She keeps talking about how American women go back a fortnight after giving birth, but completely ignores the stats that state hundreds of American women die within two months of giving birth, how the US has the lowest maternal mortality rate across all the countries in the West, and how women in the US are fighting for more maternity leave because of that.
I want to support her, but I can't help thinking she is setting herself up to fail.

Should we be trying to get into a routine from day 1, or is it better to go with the flow until a certain point?

What support is there during the 4th trimester for C section recovery ?

Hey,

Why are do we get baby blues/depression? When does ppd stop? When will hormones regulate and life and family become easy/settled?

How long is the 4th trimester?

How long has this concept been around for, I don’t remember it being a thing when I had DD in 2016

How do you help an older sibling cope with the 4th trimester

Hi, I'd like to know more about the signs of postpartum depression. What are the signs to look for? Are people with a family history of mental illness more likely to experience it? Is there anything that can be done during the pregancy or after to reduce the chances of developing it? Could it be self-diagnosed or most likely to be inderified by another family member? Is there anything concerning that mums should look out for?

Thank you

Yes, also not aware of 4th triminster ? This may be a new different thing to when I had my 2 children nearly 40 years ago, I had difficult birth in the fact the midwife was a trainee midwife and she butchered me with the knife doing an episiotomy due to i had gone over my dates by 10 days then was brought up but i had pre-eclampsia - as years later on I found that this was heireditory - which means the baby did not come out so i should have had a cesarian done immediately but my husband was sent out of the delivery room when i lost so much blood - it was everywhere but that my baby a daughter was born safely and me + my husband was elated that she didnt have any brain damage and was normal, then the room went white from all i can remember while a surgeon was called to repair me, as i had one opening from front to back of myself down below, for this guy to say he has been on shift for 13 hours and made a mistake and then they called the registrar and after 6 hours i was put into a ward to recover for 11 days which in those days wasnt normal as know you are out the next day these days if no problems. We should have sued yes for sure but we were young and it never entered our heads, as in love and so happy to have our baby. No wonder i didnt want another child but thats another story.

BUT GUESS WHAT I DIDNT HAVE A DULL DAY FOR ONE MINUTE, AND HAD NO POST NATAL DEPRESSION AFTER THE TRAUMA MENTIONED ABOVE.

I’ve just had my 2nd baby who is now 4 months and tbh I never knew about 4th trimester if I’m honest.
I don’t personally think it would have made a difference me knowing about it as I think we all just do our own thing once baby is here.
I do believe it would truly help a lot of people thou especially new first time mums who need a little help navigating through the 4th trimester and what’s to come.

Who could mums turn to for support with common fourth trimester health problems (PND, incontinence, breast feeding &infections etc) and can this be accessed through the NHS?

In my experience GPs, Midwives and Health Visitors have provided wonderful support in keeping my babies healthy, however the support for keeping mums healthy seems much less adequate and private options such as Mummy MOT / women’s health physio & lactation consultants aren’t affordable for all. Perhaps I was asking the wrong people or wrong questions, or maybe we need to be campaigning for more postnatal care?!

I am now pregnant with my 3rd baby, I have gestational diabetis, controlled by diet, same as with previous pregnancies, my previous babies had to stay in hospital for light theraphy due to jaundice which is apparently more common in pregnancies with GD, is there anything I can do either now or once the baby is born to avoid jaundice and having to go through light theraphy again?

Hello @Moancup, all children will progress at different stages and although the 4th trimester is 12 weeks long, some babies and families will need longer to adjust. Generally, babies born at 36 weeks progress well and have no setbacks. Look at the baby brain information and 5 to thrive, this will show you how you can support your baby. You cannot spoil a new baby so you can hold them as much as you like. Take a day at a time and speak to your health visitor if you have any concerns. Your baby may be suffering from reflux if they do not like to be put down, so talk to your GP for an assessment or your health visitor. Thank you for your time. Claire.

Hi @hannahbjm, this is a great question! Following the birth of your baby, you will remain under the care of your midwife for approximately two weeks. Once you have been discharged from midwifery care, you will have support from the health visitor (until your baby is five years old) and, of course, the GP surgery. They will all be there to support you with your postnatal recovery and your child's health and development. Remember local groups too! A parent and baby group or an infant feeding group can be an excellent source of support. It'll also help you to meet other parents with little ones at a similar stage to yours! I hope that helps. Zoe :)

Hi @AliceUK, thank you for your question. First and foremost, it is important to keep in mind every pregnancy and parenthood experience is different. It can be easy to worry that some of our more negative experiences will be the same next time round. Whereas there is just as much chance our experience will be completely different. The fourth trimester is our recovery time, and it is important not to set a time limit on this and take the pressure off any constraints of when you should feel ‘normal’ again. It is a time we need to show ourselves kindness and compassion and if that means life looks a little different and slower, that’s not such a bad thing. You could use your experience from last time, to prepare for the parts you know you found tricky. For example, if you found it difficult to eat nutritious meals to help with energy levels, you could cook in advance. I hope this helps. Naomi :)

Hi @WomensLandArmy, getting a partner involved in this exciting journey is all part of the fun and it is great you are reaching out to ask what this might look like. First and foremost, having someone to support your needs is really important, knowing you have a team player to support you with a drink whilst feeding, ensure you are getting a quality breakfast after a broken night sleep and being an emotional support is really important. Partners could also make time in the day for 1-1 bonding with little one through activities such as skin to skin or baby massage. It might be that your partner is responsible for bath time or nappy changes. If you are breastfeeding, you may want to express some milk in a bottle and ask your partner to support with a feed. Don’t be afraid to communicate your needs with those around you, this a time you need all the support you can get in whatever context you feel comfortable with. Zoe :)

Hi @Wolowl, thank you for your question. Everyone’s experience of early parenthood looks different and there is absolutely no rules or expectations around how much you should or shouldn’t socialise. For some, being around people can be a coping mechanism, but for many others the fourth trimester can look like lots of cuddles in bed with your baby. Post birth is our recovery time. We need to show ourselves kindness and compassion and if that means life looks a little different and slower, that’s not such a bad thing. I can assure you; you are not missing out because it is important you spend your time exactly how you choose. Time flies by quickly and whilst you won’t get this time back with your little one there will always be plenty of time to meet up with others. Naomi :)