Mumsnet users share the things they wish they'd known as a first time parent with ALDI Mamia

[YanaMumsnet]

This sponsored discussion is now closed.

With a lot to learn and a complete change in lifestyle, becoming a parent for the first time can feel overwhelming. Learning from the experiences of seasoned parents can make things a little bit less scary, so ALDI Mamia would like to hear about the things you wish you’d known as a first time parent, and would share as tips for those expecting their first child.

Here’s what ALDI Mamia has to say: “The goal of our award-winning Mamia range is to help mums navigate all stages of their baby’s first years. One way we do that is by making our amazing, top-quality nappies affordable for families. But now we need you! This is your chance to help future first-time mums by sharing all the things you’ve learnt over the years. Maybe you’ll pick up some new tips for you next one while you’re at it.”

Do you wish you’d been warned beforehand about how emotional the experience would be? Is there anything you wish you’d been told you didn’t really need? Perhaps you wish you’d been told of the things you could save money on without compromising quality for your baby? Is there anything you’ve learned since your children were born that would have been helpful while you were expecting?

Whatever you wish you’d known as a first time parent, share it on the thread below to be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £200 ALDI voucher.

Thanks and good luck!

MNHQ

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Not everyone gets the euphoric rush of love the minute baby pops out. It sometimes takes time, and that's OK.

Wish I had known that there was such a thing as shops own brand nappies!! Must have spent a small fortune on expensive nappies

It really doesn't matter if they are breast or bottle fed as a baby. When they're heading for ten years old, they will stare at the fridge willing the cold pizza to jump out into their hands whichever you go with.

Everyone tells you how tiring being a new parent is, or stressful, or about how often you'll get poo/sick on you etc. All that is true, but the secret they don't tend to say, or maybe can't articulate, is how much joy there is at all the little things children do and say - they'll amaze you and make you laugh all the time!

• Take everything people advise you to do with a pinch of salt. You know your baby better than anyone.
• Don’t compare your baby to others- they all develop differently.
• No one needs a ‘top and tail’ bowl.
• Nappy dispensers are a waste of money and smell.
• The first night your baby sleeps through you will wake up feeling so refreshed! This will undoubtedly be outweighed by the nights they wake you up hungry, wet, sick etc.
• Branded nappies, wipes, bath products are not necessarily better. Once I realised, I completely switched to supermarket own brands and never looked back.
• Babies have ‘poonamis’ when the poo travels up to their armpits and down their legs and through their clothes. This can be anytime, anywhere so you have to be prepared!
• Don’t feel bad if you use jars/ pouches of baby food- not everyone has the time to batch cook and freeze tiny portions in ice cube trays.
• If you go back to work and your baby goes to nursery/ daycare, they will be fine. You will be a blubbering mess at the beginning, but it will get easier.
• No matter what you do for your baby/ child you will always worry about what you are not doing. It’s called maternal guilt. Just know that you are making the best decisions for your baby, yourself and your family.

To go to groups even with a difficult crying baby

I wish I knew that the quicker you can train them to sleep in their own cots the better your quality of sleep will be in the long run. Also that colic only lasts a few weeks so it’s nothing to panic about

How much I would cry in the first few weeks. That it was ok to do that.

No matter how prepared you are - you will never be prepared!
After taking 2 birthing courses I still had no idea what to do when baby arrived.

I wish I'd known that the first couple of months would be such a huge shock to the system... I was not prepared for a baby that screamed nearly constantly, struggled to breastfeed, and struggled to sleep. It was brutal, not the picture-perfect image of motherhood I was expecting (plus netflix). But I also wish I'd known it was ok to find it hard and that it would change so quickly that by five months she would be a happy, smiley cheerful baby who feeds well from a bottle, sleeps well, and has her reflux under control with medicine!

That sleep issues would fix themselves.

I wish I had known that you could co-sleep safely and that it's a whole lot safer to do that and get some sleep than be horribly sleep deprived all the time!

That somedays as new parents are simply not as fabulous as things make out! If you look less than perfect but your baby is content, if you get to eat something and a chance to shower these are little wins! Take the good with the bad and dont listen to everyone's advice, it's your baby, your family do whatever works for you!
It's hard enough without comparing yourself to some people!

That it's ok to not be perfect. Wether it's that I haven't got dressed today, or the house is a mess, or we ate biscuits for breakfast the kids are fine.

To never feel guilty for sitting on the sofa having cuddles and forgetting everything else, you can never get those days back and who really cares if the place looks a mess. And IF people make a comment, as some will, ignore it - your baby, your house, your rules.

Parenting is a long game. Dont panic when people start comparing what their babies can do, with yours. All children are different, even twins!

Don't buy expensive things! They use stuff for 5 seconds and don't even notice it. Second hand is definitely best for everything except mattress and car seat.

Biggest thing is that envelope neck vests can be pulled down to remove rather than up over head; can't believe how long it took for me to realise this! Total game changer when dealing with a leaked nappy.

That most things are a phase...that mine would grow up to love food even though she was a fussy toddler

That I'd have so much less spare cash. I really wish I'd hidden odd £10 notes in coat pockets and handbags for me to find post-baby

Babies who are overtired do an excellent job of looking wide awake. If they won’t settle with a 8pm bedtime, pull it back a half hour rather than putting them down later.
And look after yourself. You are important too.
Trust your intuition.
And, I’m sorry for the doom and gloom when this should be a happy time but, if you haven’t already done so, start an escape fund. Put some money away. Just in case. Babies change people. They put stress on relationships. If everything’s fine, great. You have a nest egg. If not, you will be thankful to start your single parent life with it.

That the baby vests can come
off downwards rather than over their heads. Useful when covered in poo!

That breastfeeding is hard and that some advice is helpful and some is downright stressful so to engage that 'what is good for me' filter from day one!

That if your child takes a liking to a specific toy/blanket buy two and swap them so they wear at the same rate.
I didnt do this so now we have one stinky/matted 6 year old toy he loves and one perfectly fluffy version that I kept in case we lost the other one that he doesnt like.

That spending time with your baby is worth so much more to you than whatever you can earn by leaving them to go out to work. Live in a smaller house, smaller TV, whatever it takes, that sacrifice is easier to make than having to leave your baby with someone else and risk missing crucial milestones, and missing them.