How have your children got up to 'monkey business'? Share with Ape for the chance to win a £300 voucher

[LucyBMumsnet]

This sponsored discussion is now closed. Thank you to everyone who posted their stories below."

Children often choose their moments wisely and cause mischief as soon as you turn your back. It’s only once they’ve already buttered the carpet or themselves head-to-toe in Sudocrem that you realise they’re up to monkey business. Ape have cut the monkey business - making snacks with plant based ingredients and natural flavours - and would like to hear the stories of the times your children have got up to mischief.

Here’s what Ape has to say: “We know there are times when your kids have caused a little chaos. However, you have to admit that their antics make for great entertainment. They’re the moments that turn into memories which you look back at and laugh about. Ape snacks contain no monkey business, but we do want to hear about the good kind of monkey business your cheeky children get up to.

Perhaps they gave themselves a haircut or decided to decorate the house with streams of precious loo roll? Maybe you caught them red-handed stealing from the snacks cupboard? (We don’t blame them when there are tasty treats around!). Whatever the monkey business is, we can’t wait to hear what stories you have to share!”

What’s the most mischievous thing your child has done? Perhaps they used felt tips to draw on brilliant white walls or tucked into your birthday cake when no one was looking? How did you cope with the situation? Did it require a big clean up job or was there a lot of explaining that needed to be done? Is it something you laugh about in hindsight?

Whatever mayhem your child has caused, let us know on the thread below and you will be entered into a prize draw where one lucky Mumsnetter will win a £300 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

Dd1 got in to the sudocrem when she was 18 months old and it was everywhere!!
All over her and in her hair, on the tv and DVD player and all over the floor!!! The one saving grace was that it was a tiled floor! Dread to think what would have happened if it had been carpet 😱

My middle child scribbled all over her tummy with permanent marker....this happened the day after I was telling my dh about the time my brother shoved a marker down his trousers....thank god ours never did anything like that.....oh!!!

DD2 once turned DS2 into Spiderman with felt pens, including his body!

Not mine, but two children of a friend of mine played Hansel and Gretel with a dog cage. The sister found an open padlock lying around, and imprisoned her brother. They played happily at this for a good hour before it was discovered that nobody knew where the key was! Poor Hansel stayed locked up for a long time before the right tools were found to set him free.

By using biro to scribble all over my new leather purse ...could never get it out

DC1 getting hold of the water proof mascara and decorating the paintwork, carpets, wardrobe doors and the lining of my new rain mac (thankfully lining not outer as it didn't come out!) was impressive.

When ds1 was about 2 I left the room for approximately 2 minutes to sign for a parcel. When I came back into the room he had put sudocrem all over the tv because it looked sore. Tbh I didn't know wether to laugh or cry.

Our funniest (now, years later, we can look back & laugh) was when my DH was doing some work in the bathroom and had removed the sink top. Our toddler DS picked up the screwdriver and posted it straight down the open pipe, a good metre to where in jammed in the u-bend at the bottom - and exclaimed ' do tools, help Daddy'! In slow motion I picked him up and removed him from the bathroom as my DH started to look like Incredible Hulk...

I have a great photo of DD and DS ages about 2 and 4. They got up early one morning, dressed up as elves and stuffed each other’s ears full of play dough! No lasting damage, thankfully but I knew a lie-in had to be too good to be true.

I was giving my older kids a bath and my one year old toddler was being mummy's little helper. I left the bathroom to go a few feet to grab towels from the airing cupboard...I immediately turn around to screaming and my toddler trying to scrub down my middle child with the TOILET BRUSH...it's a shiny rose gold toilet brush that my toddler is totally obsessed with.

My poor children were traumatised...let's just say mummy's littler helper has now been relieved of their duties

My children decided to be artists during lockdown but the only issue is that they’ve used all my makeup!

I have 4 children and at some point over the years, they have all got up to monkey business. However, there are two incidents that really stick in my mind.

When my eldest DD was 5, she was playing with Hama beads at the table, whilst I was bathing my two younger children. When I came downstairs she looked sheepish and a bit upset. Asking her what was wrong, she told me "nothing", but it was obvious something wasn't quite right. After some cajoling, it turned out that she had a Hama bead stuck up her nose. I asked her what happened - "it jumped up there" was her reply! We couldn't see it so my husband had to take her to A & E to have it removed. I was an A & E Receptionist at the time so hadn't wanted to go, but the Sister who removed it, did talk to me about "jumping beads" when i next saw her at work. My DD still remembers this happening and it often gets mentioned.

The other memorable "monkey business" involved my son. He is the second of my 4 children and has 3 sisters.

One year as Christmas approached, we seemed to receive a number of tins of chocolates - the standard Celebrations, Quality Street etc. With having children and dogs, we didn't leave chocolates out on the side. I had stored all the chocolates in our larder under the stairs.

On Christmas morning, our routine was stockings first thing and then presents after church. we had returned from church and put the dinner on etc and I decided to put a few chocolates out. I went to the top tub and thought it was light - on opening it, the tin was only half full. It was blatantly obvious one of the children had opened the tin and helped themself, being smart enough to replace the tape afterwards.

I was angry and knew it was either DS or DD2 - DD1 just wouldn't have done it and DD4 was only about 2, so wouldn't have been able to do it. I sat both children down and asked who had taken the sweets. DS commented that none of the nutty sweets had been eaten so it must have been DD2 as she has a nut allergy.

Neither child would admit to it so, eventually, I said that there would be no Christmas present opening until I found out who it was. Eventually, DD2, aged about 9, confessed to having eaten the chocolates. We had a talk about it and then the children were all allowed their presents.

Later in the day, DD2 came up to me - "I didn't really steal the sweets" she told me. I asked why she had said she had - "because I wanted my Christmas presents". Turns out DS1 had been very sly and not only had he taken the sweets but he had deliberately left the nutty sweets as he was less likely to get the blame. He was definitely punished after the event, more for letting his sister take the blame.

Yesterday while I was feeding my youngest son, the next door neighbour rang the doorbell. Turns out they were in their garden and were slightly worried as they could see my 3 year old son climbing and hanging from the garage. I’ve told him sooo many times not to do it, I need eyes in the back of my head with this one, he’s a literal monkey 🐵!

Our bookshelves have come in for so much unsolicited reorganisation in their time 🤨

Ds was only about 8 months old when I turned proud and found he had pulled himself up on the (low unit) and was merrily chomping through a pear, core and all. The fruit bowl got moved after that! Another food based one but I've also realised that he hides his snacks inside his toys (cars Van's and ambulances particuarly as they have doors) to save for later. Monkey!

Mine still are and they should be well beyond that stage by now - it's mainly midnight snacking - 'mug cakes' for DD and spicy chicken wings (home-made) a penty for DS. Oh and not doing the washing-up afterwards! 'Children' are never too old for monkey business!

My eldest cut his own hair. He managed to get so close to the root that we had to shave his head without the guard and he was bald for months. He also drew on his own face when he was supposed to be in bed. It was a Sunday night as well and we couldn't get it all off so he had to go to school with black rings around his eyes and neck. He didn't learn from this because he did a similar thing later on that week.

There are loads of things like this. Living with a child with adhd is, erm, interesting to say the least!

My daughter took several bottles of my nail polish (including one Chanel one that I keep for best and some Opi) She was in reception.

She decided to open a nail salon on the playground and gave several girls manicures on the proviso that they would bring the money tomorrow!! I got called in by the teacher at the end of the day...she was trying her best not to chuckle!

Racketeering at age 4!! I never go to salons so no idea where the idea came from! she is an astute businesswoman.

When I was a child myself. I decided age 4 to be a complete daredevil. I took a space hopper, an empty bucket of duplo that doubled up as a helmet and a royal wedding tea-towel for some extra padding.
As i put the tea-towel on my head and Princess Diana's face was covering my eyes and the bucket was plopped on top!

I then proceeded to bounce from the top of my staircase on a huge orange space hopper!! the first hint my mum had that I was up to any monkey business was my head hitting the sides of the walls.
I was mildly concussed but ok! The space hopper was locked in the garage after that!

Executive decision making has never been my bag!

My dd once tipped out a jar full of gravy granules onto the kitchen floor and used to them to "draw" with

My Ds also went through a phase of throwing shoes into the bath...

My mischievous dd has discovered a new lockdown activity! A few weeks ago she was playing quietly in her brother's bedroom, so I took advantage of the peace to get some work done. 5 minutes later I had a text message from a friend - she had just been running past our house and spotted something hanging over the roof of our porch. I ran outside to find that the contents of ds's room had been 'posted' out of a very narrow window opening by dd and were now scattered across our front drive. The 'thing' hanging over our porch was his dressing gown! He was mortified but she thought it was hilarious! (Dd is 6 and has a learning disability - she is the most mischievous (but amazing) person I know - we could honestly fill this thread with examples of her monkey business!)

Oh my gosh, so many! Quite a few involving nail varnish and rugs! However the one that still makes me LMAO is DD2 getting hold of orange paint when she was dressed in her beautiful Princess Sofia dress! Totally ruined it, but the picture I took of her is absolutely priceless!

When DD was about 3, she was helping me cook spag bol. I asked her to hold the garlic puree, turned my back, and she squeezed a quarter of the tube into her mouth. After an hour, the smell began emerging from her skin. Our childminder shampooed her carpets, we drove everywhere with the windows open, and MIL wouldn't go near her.

Earlier this year, DGS put DD's electric toothbrush into the microwave and nearly burned the house down.